Nuudawn

Ah hey...moans are okay : ). I have them all the time. Usually there is something behind the "moan" though..I'm either in self-pity or one of the emotions of HALT apply. "Tired" for me is a big one. I was sooooooo tired last night that I had no energy to address my discontent..yet did I sleep? Noooo. It felt idiotic to retire for the night at 7:00 p.m...so I watched mindless television and ate far too much food. In the old days...I just would've gotten drunk. And that would've kicked the arse out of me further. Instead of feeling waaaay better today (because I did go to sleep at 10 pm)..I would have been hungover and further depleted...rather than refreshed and read to face a new day : )

13unluckyforsom

Or..... Isnt this hangover trip to hell and back just freakin awesome - let's plan to do this every day lol

13unluckyforsom

I used to drink even if my eyes were closing lol even if I wasn't even enjoying it - just because - then be ten times worse the next day!

Insanity doesn't even touch the rationalising and justifying that went on in my head so as I could drink that poison!

Hell any excuse really would do lol it was just a matter of picking one for the day!!

Oh look it's a full moon 'lets drink'

Oh look I cleaned the house 'lets drink' lol

mecanix

I was wondering what your missing Is it the blackouts ? the sweats ? the incordination ? passing out on the sofa ? talking drivel to people on the phone or e-mail ? the giddy head ? the "ahem" accidents ? knocking the glass flying ? spilling booze everywhere ? the stinky breath ? the sore eyes ? the bad sleep ? the furry tounge ? not being there for the kids ? not being there for the other half ? going back to day one and enduring the early stages of recovery allover again ? the flushed face ? the bad skin ? the poor diet ? the stress and tension of do you have enough ? the shame and anxiety ? the liver , kidney and brain damamge ?



Stay strong even if ya bored .. bestwishes , m

13unluckyforsom

LOL LOL LOL Well for me it has to be the bad co ordination - those bruises I used to wake up with were smashers and yet I never seem to recall falling lol I also loved the shame - oh or the wakening up in panic mode and checking who you'd phoned or txt lol but by the end I was getting too smart - I was deleting call logs and messages and browser history before I passed out drunk so half the time I really did have no idea who I'd been talking to or messaging!

Yeah - fond memories I must say lol don't know why anyone would want to quit lol

foolsgold66

I still have the fuzzy tongue. Damn you guys for getting rid of that!

13unluckyforsom

I actually woke up one morning - no joking - sitting upright on the couch with my legs crossed fully clothed - lol

On the other side of the coin as much as I like to have a joke about my drinking and granted - I did do and say some funny **** but reality wise - it was a hell of a waste of 6/7 years.

Raider

Jdooner, my husband is in denial. What are you going to do ? Can't diagnose the spouse.

13 good for you! I wasn't so strong. Now I feel guilt. Hang in there.

mecanix

Yeh Emily ,
i lost a house , a car , a job , my cat who i'd had for 11 years , four teeth and given some other rotten ones , some bad scars . I had international debt and a blood pressure of 180/120 and still i carried on ..
My life kinda stopped growing at about 21 and did'nt start again untill 2 years ago .. 16 years later ..

I know feeling like drinking isn't drinking , it does change though , i've not felt like i wanted to drink in over a year now . Get your head right and i'm sure you'll be able to do that as well .

Bestwishes, m

jdooner

Raider don't beat yourself up. My guess is you will have ups and downs and relapses along the way. The key, as I understand it is not just getting dry...this is step one, but changing the psychy and the surrendering is sort of the key.

I can't focus on my wife right now, I need to get a sober and clean mind before I tackle some of these bigger issues. I am guessing around a couple or a few months I will either inspire her to make a change or not. At that point I can decide what to do and that choice will be pretty clear if I take emotions out of the decision.

13unluckyforsom

Mecanix I've recently kept a couple of plants alive but also accidentally killed a goldfish - every time I was out I forgot to buy fish food... Oooops I did try giving it bread though.. It wasn't intentional murder lol.

Joking aside I've a long way to go and a lot of head space to clear - but ill get there cos the alternative isn't one I'm up for!