Advice Please
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 170
Advice Please
Im in a sticky situation. My girlfriend lives in London, I live and work about 100 miles away in my hometown. My parents own a flat in my hometown that I have an offer to move into at a low rent. I want to move in there, live on my own, free from distractions, and fit in as many aa meetings as possible. This town can also be very boring with not alot to do.
However I also want to be with my girlfriend, i dont want to break up with her and finish a 5 year relationship. She keeps asking me to move to London. I think if i move up there i think it may be harder to stay sober. As I would have to live with people. Although a positive from living there is there are more alcohol free activities to do there, like going to the theatre etc, also there would be the support of my girlfriend which could help alot.
What do you think the best option is?
However I also want to be with my girlfriend, i dont want to break up with her and finish a 5 year relationship. She keeps asking me to move to London. I think if i move up there i think it may be harder to stay sober. As I would have to live with people. Although a positive from living there is there are more alcohol free activities to do there, like going to the theatre etc, also there would be the support of my girlfriend which could help alot.
What do you think the best option is?
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 737
I'm thinking that if you wanted 100% to move in with your gf (and I might be wrong), then you'd be packing, not asking us 
Also, as you know, jobs are not easy to find -would you be able to find work in London?
Also, as you know, jobs are not easy to find -would you be able to find work in London?
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 544
My advice?
Fast forward the movie....to, say, this time of the year in 2018. Now where do you see yourself? If you still see nothing remember this, if aren't making plans for yourself, than eventually you will find yourself fitting into someone else's "plans."
Good luck and God Bless
Fast forward the movie....to, say, this time of the year in 2018. Now where do you see yourself? If you still see nothing remember this, if aren't making plans for yourself, than eventually you will find yourself fitting into someone else's "plans."
Good luck and God Bless
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 5,937
If you two have five years together I'd say you need to have a long, heartfelt talk with her. Let her know how much you're suffering from alcohol; maybe she doesn't know. Make it clear to her that the one non-negotiable is sobriety. See how she feels about that.
Maybe you're better off without 'distractions.' Or maybe you have an ally in her. Talk to her and find out.
Maybe you're better off without 'distractions.' Or maybe you have an ally in her. Talk to her and find out.
Not Alone
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: South East UK
Posts: 1,513
Hey thesun,
Tricky one. What I will say, like coraltint ^^^ is that London has a ridiculous amount of meetings. Breakfast meetings, midnight meetings etc. You could go from one to another from sun up to sun down and most likely not have a gap of more than 20 minutes between each one.
Natom.
Tricky one. What I will say, like coraltint ^^^ is that London has a ridiculous amount of meetings. Breakfast meetings, midnight meetings etc. You could go from one to another from sun up to sun down and most likely not have a gap of more than 20 minutes between each one.
Natom.
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