Erratic

Ive been bz with work this week, but my drinking has been here 2 days and another 1 day. This is not what i want. I never went to the alcohol services on wed due to work. I have another appointment on 4th sept and i really want to nip my drinking in the bud.

I want to be on this forum but when im drinking i feel that im letting you all down and myself.

I want to fight this, im sick of saying im back on day 1, just finding it really hard to put 100% into this.

I really need some

I need motivation, to feel good in myself, keep myself bz.

sry for all the I's as im thinking bad about me saying me all the time

So guess i am in a trap,need to be smart enough to find myself out of it!

If anyone has any ideas or advice in gaining all this please reply.

Oldselfagain

Hi Erratic,

We all go through fits and starts. The key is learning your triggers and putting a plan in place to resist the temptation. Hang in there

pinkdog

Hi erratic, it's okay to be thinking about yourself. It's good to think about yourself and your situation. That leads to answers. Making the appointment is a good start. Coming here is a good start. Finding ways to stay busy without drinking is also good. Keep looking for answers. Great support here. I found exercise to help so much with anxiety and cravings. It also helps sweat toxins out. Drinking lots of water helps too. Best wishes.

GracieLou

I was in that trap too and being smart enough had nothing to do with finding the way out.

Going to other people that had the rope, the ladders and the strength I did not have was the only way for me. The only action I took was to reach out and admit I needed help. That is the first step out of the trap. The second is to accept that help.

Spinach

No one got here quickly.
Just keep on trying to get further days I found after a good number I found it easier not to break the run and soon enough I changed my relationship with the demon drink and I found myself being teetotal and only occasionally think of drinking but when I think of the consequence I dont !
Keep on find a focus to keep those days adding up. Keep on breaking the habit.
Of your picking up is about giving yourself a treat you've got to allow yourself time to remember how much better it would be without addiction and all it's consequences ,pick a few of your own and put them between you and your first drink.
Keep here and don't add worrying about picking up here . You will get there.
John.

jazzfish

Getting some traction in those first days of sobriety can be so difficult. However, there is only one way to do it: don't drink. Do not pick up that next drink.

I have looked at many alternative approaches to quitting and this is the foundation of all of them. There is no magic to it. It will suck for a while. However, there are support and strategies available for doing this - almost all dealt with somewhere on this site.

I spent far too long looking for the "magic" solution to my drinking. I wasted time looking for an easy way out. There is none. Don't drink.

Use this site to get support and encouragement from others. Use this site to hear experience and strategies for staying sober. Use this site to let others know what you are experiencing and know that you are not alone.

IOAA2

Hi. I had much difficulty with my thinking process until I realized my drinking was out of control. Many things I had put a priority on were blocking my path to being sober. Most were BS reasons to continue drinking. Things slowly got better when honesty started to take the place of the BS. I went to a lot of flesh meetings where people understand and help in person with love and caring. It was strongly advised, which I didn’t like, that if I didn’t pick up the first drink I wouldn’t have to get sober AGAIN. It took awhile to get out of the alcoholic haze thinking process but the journey has been beyond my dreams. There is much good help on these pages if we ask.

Dee74

Hi erratic

I agree with those here who've said it's not about being smart.

I tried to think my way out for years and got nowhere - the one thing that will work is action.

I know you're busy with work, but whatever time you have spare I think it's important to spend some of that on your recovery - if you can rebook the alcohol services, or see your DR about some help in that area, thats great...if you can think about ways you can get more support, that would be terrific too.

If all you have time to do is think about ways you can change what you do at home, and work out some other things to do than drink....and hopefully find some time to post here every day or night, then thats a start

D

carsula

Hi there
Okay this is causing you pain and misery. You can stop it now. Just do it. Enjoy being free.

Lightning Bug

Keep coming back - especially when you drink. We are here for you.

Erratic

Thanks for everyones advice and comfort xx

I just guess im sick of excusing myself for drinking.

There is alot of situations i get into which tempts me to drink and its hard to not do the things that is causing me to drink, if u understand? sometimes its just normal things like going to the shop, finishing work, feeling in a good mood, tidying up ect.

I know i have to be 100% in doing this, and ur right i dont have to be smart about it. I will keep coming back as u all give great support and i know i dont have enough around me to keep me going.

Im on a break from work being here, so i will come back when i finish tonight. distract, distract.

see you all soon xx

EndGameNYC

Hi Erratic.

You're not letting anyone down here by what you do or don't do. The biggest thing that affects me is to know that someone is continuing to suffer. I've been around long enough and relapsed badly enough to know what real pain is.

What worked for me was to accept as much help and support as I could bear. I couldn't have done this without it.

Erratic

Thanks end, i think i understand.

Today hasnt been a good day, but i knew that going to my friends who i havent seen in months is that i would drink. Her place was about drinking and i know that i wouldnt be able to go for coffee.

I guess a new day tomorrow, im by myself and fight the urges with out any cravings.

support here is great, just need to take it. xx

carsula

You need to remind yourself about why you want to stop drinking when you are tempted to drink again. I mean really think about the pain. Feel the hangover and feel the regret!

Eleni58

Erratic, I joined this forum before I actually quit drinking to get tips and feedbacks on how to safely quit drinking and stay sober. Was a Godsend! Hope you stick around.

Eleni58

Also, as long as you're persistent and refuse to give up, there is NO LIMIT to the number of Day Ones you can have--the key is that you keep coming back and continue to strive for your ultimate goal of complete sobriety.

Silvy69

Agree and was there myself when I stopped drinking I knew I couldn't do it alone and got myself to an AA meeting.. That is where I got my support and where I am learning about myself and how to stay sober... One thing I have learning there is no "I" for me but "WE" ... We can do this!

GracieLou

I do understand.

Yes. The normal things that we all do. I did them all while drinking. I cleaned while drinking, I cooked while drinking, I did laundry while drinking, I played on the computer while drinking and I watched TV while drinking. That is a lot of drinking...lol

I thought I associated everything I did, other than work, with drinking.

What I found though if I did none of these, I would still drink. It was not the action or chore that set me to drink. It was that I was always drinking, period. I was already engaged with the drink and the chore or action was just a side line, not the cause or the trigger.

Towards the end of my drinking career I got busy doing nothing and I got it done fast. The drink, again, came first. Then the chores that took me all weekend to do with most left undone because I did two things and deserved to relax with a drink!

Louise82

Yes, I can definitely relate to just normal things being opportunities to drink. The only way I could break the cycle of regret and temptation was to seek out help. I couldn't stop drinking on my own. So coming back here to SR and posting regularly is a great start, Erratic. You may also want to seek out local face-to-face support like AA. You don't have to stop drinking before you can start attending AA. The only requirement for AA membership is a desire to quit drinking.

Erratic

Thanks again guys, im here but still not sober yet.

Really understand what ur all saying and i know it in myself that i can do it, longer this goes on for it be harder. Dont want to go back where family life was torn apart and dont want to go back into hospital. Im trying but its not enough.

sry feeling sry for myself i guess. still need that kick up the bum.