Need help but asking is hard
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: ont,canada
Posts: 30
Need help but asking is hard
I have been trying to get into recovery for almost ayear now.I've been to some meetings and even to a counsellor but i just was so scared to put myself out there and look at these people and say i need help.I've been trying this on my own and countless times i just end up drinking.I'm pretty functional in my daily life i work and seem to support the people around me when needed but the lies i tell to hide the real truth.I know all about the yets of drinking and i don't know how i have managed to stay out of deep trouble.I steal money from my work so i can drink some days(not something i really admit to the seriousness of)my job could be gone so fast if i was caught.Drinking at work and even driving when i just wouldn't wait until i got home.I wish i could just forget everything else and not worry and just walk into a meeting and let these people help me.I know if i asked they would.I guess i'm here now because i'm coming off along stretch of drinking and if i could just get a few days sober maybe just maybe i can do this.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Riverside, Ca.
Posts: 388
Busy
I know exactly how you feel, I am an alcoholic, I did a lot of shamefull things while drinking, asking for help is very hard, but it's also the begining of a new better life.
I'm glad you have found us here and hope you will stick around, there are a lot of good hearted people here to offer support/
hang in there
Jay
I know exactly how you feel, I am an alcoholic, I did a lot of shamefull things while drinking, asking for help is very hard, but it's also the begining of a new better life.
I'm glad you have found us here and hope you will stick around, there are a lot of good hearted people here to offer support/
hang in there
Jay
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,709
Hi busy, I'm Dan, in Northern Ontario.
If you're coming off a run, best to go slow and pay attention to your body and the signals it's sending you. Sounds like you've been here before though.
I walked into a meeting about twelve hours after the last bottle of a 10 or 12 day binge. Wasn't easy. I was a broken down man, spiritualy and physicaly.
But I heard some things that first night that gave me enough courage to go through the terrible 3 or 4 days of withdrawal.
The help is there my friend, whenever you reach for it.
We're a good bunch here, supportive without judgement.
So a heartfelt welcome from a fellow canadian.
We've been waiting for you.
If you're coming off a run, best to go slow and pay attention to your body and the signals it's sending you. Sounds like you've been here before though.
I walked into a meeting about twelve hours after the last bottle of a 10 or 12 day binge. Wasn't easy. I was a broken down man, spiritualy and physicaly.
But I heard some things that first night that gave me enough courage to go through the terrible 3 or 4 days of withdrawal.
The help is there my friend, whenever you reach for it.
We're a good bunch here, supportive without judgement.
So a heartfelt welcome from a fellow canadian.
We've been waiting for you.
Gold Member
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: It's raining again!
Posts: 2,494
Hi Busy, just keep posting! There are lots of ways to get help... Talk to your Dr, go to a detox, check on the help that is advertized here. I never really got into trouble either and the not yets never came knocking on my door,but if you know your doing wrong,then stop before you do get caught. Stealing from your job is a crime and your very lucky not to get caught yet...Even if you got sober, they still might find out,but you might have a fighting chance if you are sober... Good luck and I do think you know what to do!
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,512
Hi Busy,
I'm Anna, an alcoholic and welcome to SR. I'm glad you found us here. This is a great place to ccome for support. I know how hard it is to look for help and ask for help. But, all you have to do is not drink today. We're here to help.
Love, Anna
I'm Anna, an alcoholic and welcome to SR. I'm glad you found us here. This is a great place to ccome for support. I know how hard it is to look for help and ask for help. But, all you have to do is not drink today. We're here to help.
Love, Anna
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: ont,canada
Posts: 30
Thanks for the replies, everyday the failure to quit makes things seem worse.I never imagined how hard this would be, the first time i knew i was in trouble i was 18 years old and my friend was to go with me to an appointment with a counsellor and i never went and sometimes i wonder were i be if i had.Here i am 18 years later and i have nothing but work and drinking no interests, i can't even be involved with someone because that would mean sharing myself and feelings.I listen to this song called "my own prison" i just feel like i'm in my own prison.I get pretty sad sometimes and i wonder how much more can i take.Why i keep doing this to myself i don't understand.I want the hope you all share.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: God's Grace
Posts: 689
Busy, I know how scary it can be. I am naturally a very nervous, shy person. Asking for help was ver hard. Very scary walking down to the church basement for that first meeting. But with time, comfort will come. Most every other person in that room probably has felt like you. Your not alone in this.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,709
Originally Posted by Busy
I want the hope you all share.
Don't drink today. If you have, stop now.
But I'm afraid the only way to get the help you crave is to ask for it. You have to find that courage inside you. It's there, somewhere. It won't cost you anything to go sit in a room with others like you for an hour.
Took me a very long time to figure out that I had to ask for help. Very long. Man am I glad I did.
You will be too.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Life Is Short
Posts: 2,017
Hi Busy....welcome to sober recovery. I'm so happy you're reaching out for help...grab hold of it, and LISTEN to what others tell you....best teachers around, but you have to really PAY ATTENTION. I've tried countless times alone, only to fail repeatedly.....I went back to AA, and it's working, I know what to do now, I finally admitted to myself I can't do it alone. So do whatever you have to do to stop this insanity, it's no way to live...hell it's not living period.
Wishing you the best on your recovery, it's pretty good on this side you know....so come on.
Hugs......Denise
Wishing you the best on your recovery, it's pretty good on this side you know....so come on.
Hugs......Denise
Member
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: out there...
Posts: 2,653
Welcome Busy ...
I was just about your age when I hit the end of my run. I had no hobbies left. couldn't keep a job, and my relationships were all on thin ice. I wondered why this was not something I could do for myself. I finally surrendered and gave the suggestions a try. Hung around after the meetings, made some friends, called them and planned events that didn't involve getting loaded. They helped me remember the lousy results of all my carefully planned using and here it is 13 years later. Things are good and I have more hobbies and interests than I can get to. It' s a challenge to find time for all the realationships, and I can't remember the last time I was bored.
Give yourself a break, take it a minute at a time and just don't pick up. It gets better.
I was just about your age when I hit the end of my run. I had no hobbies left. couldn't keep a job, and my relationships were all on thin ice. I wondered why this was not something I could do for myself. I finally surrendered and gave the suggestions a try. Hung around after the meetings, made some friends, called them and planned events that didn't involve getting loaded. They helped me remember the lousy results of all my carefully planned using and here it is 13 years later. Things are good and I have more hobbies and interests than I can get to. It' s a challenge to find time for all the realationships, and I can't remember the last time I was bored.
Give yourself a break, take it a minute at a time and just don't pick up. It gets better.
knucklehead
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: earth
Posts: 694
Busy i like all of us here on this site are dealing with our very serious problems with addictions. I really dont have any time sober it is my 3rd day with out a drink and my 2nd day with out a hangover. I know that i am really tired of drinking and i am struggling with myself. i have very little faith in my self but I havent drank for a few days now.
I know that i will have to battle myself daily. I have often lost to the addict that is me. I am very unsteady but I know for sure that I am not going to drink today. i didnt always feel that way today but I made it over that hump. Tomorrow is yet to be written but i have gotten some good advice here. I will pass this on to you we our responsible for our recovery and I am responsible for my recovery. We need to help each other along. glad to have you with us.
I know that i will have to battle myself daily. I have often lost to the addict that is me. I am very unsteady but I know for sure that I am not going to drink today. i didnt always feel that way today but I made it over that hump. Tomorrow is yet to be written but i have gotten some good advice here. I will pass this on to you we our responsible for our recovery and I am responsible for my recovery. We need to help each other along. glad to have you with us.
OH SH!T
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: RICHMOND,VIRGINIA-
Posts: 1,655
HEY BUSY,GLAD YOUR HERE.HEY BEACH GLAD YOUR HERE ALSO.
I'M TED,A REAL ALCOHOLIC.THERE IS A BETTER WAY TO LIVE.
STICK AROUND AND FIND YOUR WAY WELL.GREAT BUNCH OF FOLKS HERE.
ONE DAY AT A TIME IT DOES GET BETTER!!!.......ted
:boat
I'M TED,A REAL ALCOHOLIC.THERE IS A BETTER WAY TO LIVE.
STICK AROUND AND FIND YOUR WAY WELL.GREAT BUNCH OF FOLKS HERE.
ONE DAY AT A TIME IT DOES GET BETTER!!!.......ted
:boat
Member
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: QUeeNz,NoOYaWk
Posts: 205
Busy welcome...This a great first start...I know how scary it is to actually say out loud you need help and that your an addict..For a long time i couldn't say it either..Reading your post reminded me of my first session with a physhologist..My mom bought me to him cause she thought i had an eating disorder cause i never ate and i lost so much weight so quickly..She didnt wanna believe her 15 yr old had a problem with drugs...I remember sitting across from him and sweating and feeling like i was gonna puke...I remember thinking if hes a real shrink he would see that somethings wrong..But he didnt he told my mom i probably was just going through teen issue and will be fine...I wasnt...But by him saying that..Kept me in my addiction for 3 more years...
Its hard to surrender..and to say you need help...When our minds and bodies are trained to fight till the end...But you have to just come to terms and realize the only way you gonna come up outta this hell is to give in and realize you cant win...You cant drink..Even though you believe you function fine...There must be something off thats making you feel you got a problem so obviously you aint functioning ok...You made a first step..By asking for help here...Keep coming here and try to find a good AA group near you...Take baby steps and you will find your way...I wish you well..Jackie
Its hard to surrender..and to say you need help...When our minds and bodies are trained to fight till the end...But you have to just come to terms and realize the only way you gonna come up outta this hell is to give in and realize you cant win...You cant drink..Even though you believe you function fine...There must be something off thats making you feel you got a problem so obviously you aint functioning ok...You made a first step..By asking for help here...Keep coming here and try to find a good AA group near you...Take baby steps and you will find your way...I wish you well..Jackie
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: a spiritual vortex, Colorado
Posts: 844
hi busy
mack- addict whose DOC was alcohol
i do AA/NA- like Dan sez- no reason to wait a few days to catch a meeting-
i'm in the same boat as gooch - i been doin this for 8 years and it has done nuthin but get better
you are not alone in this
you never HAVE to drink again
mackat
mack- addict whose DOC was alcohol
i do AA/NA- like Dan sez- no reason to wait a few days to catch a meeting-
i'm in the same boat as gooch - i been doin this for 8 years and it has done nuthin but get better
you are not alone in this
you never HAVE to drink again
mackat
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