nomis

Fellow black sheep here. For me, I'm finding being a black sheep has less to do with other people's problems and more the way I act towards them, particularly my gossiping and conniving. Just my two cents.

fini

iwh,

i've been on another forum for years where you can give stars to a post, from one to five, and we all decided not to use them.

for myself, i decided i'd never use the "thanks" button, as it would put me in a quandary at times. and i'd be adding to what i see as a problem. a needless feature that is problematic, partly in exactly the way you mention, and partly because it seems to also be used as a "loyalty" thing (as in Natty's excellent point of saying thanks for your pals drivel
i think forums would be better off without that feature.

Junegirl

Iwh, there are some excellent points made by Natty, mecanix and BigSombrero about the possible reasons for the little thanks you've gotten. I think that as humans we want some validation, some recognition of the positive things we're doing (and you definitely are giving some positive things here!) But the validation isn't always spoken outloud. It's there though. As someone said, many are reading and appreciating and just can't "thank" (lurkers) or are scrolling through quickly (me).
Anyway, hope that's helpful. This thread is not a waste of time,

June

soberlicious

Well, for me, I just had to realize that there are going to be times that I have a thought, no matter how profound I think it is, that either bores others or they aren't moved by, or that they have no opinion on and therefore no response.

It's not the end of the world. In fact, nothing really is...except of course the actual end of the world.

Validation from others is always nice, but it's not necessary to living a happy life. That realization alone has brought me the most freedom, second only to ending to my addiction.

How much weight I give others' actions is completely up to me.

SnwFlower

Hi Iwh, thank you for sharing your thoughts, and I hope you feel better. We're a big family here and we care.

I think we've all experienced those thoughts a time or two. In fact, here's almost verbatim the dialogue that goes on in my head when that happens to me, "Did I type something weird, or maybe it was just stupid? I'm being silly....(giggle) Oh well (another giggle)." The giggle is at myself, for actually caring about it so much and "needing" that affirmation. Don't forget that it's an amazing community, and trust that intentions are good. Also, when it all comes down to it, whether we get a "Thank you" or not, it doesn't mean that others don't appreciate or love what you wrote. And maybe sometimes they don't love what you wrote,...but who cares? Just by writing your thoughts you are a part of the SR family/community and touching many lives, and your thoughts are appreciated immensely. I say march on Iwh! Post away regardless of those "Thank You's" - That's my 2 cents.

Grungehead

I missed this thread earlier, but I posted in another thread that was started about the Thanks button. When I first got here I paid a lot of attention to the amount of thanks I got for a post. I felt like the more "thanks" I got the more accepted I was by the group. Of course that worked the other way and I thought I posted some "masterpieces" that didn't get any or many thanks. I then realized I was missing the entire point of posting here.

I nicknamed the area where the thanks show up as the "resentment bar" LOL. Ever since then I don't worry about the thanks. I still give them and I still appreciate any I receive, but now all I worry about is if it helps someone...member or guest...thanks or no thanks. That is what this place is all about anyway, giving and receiving support in our quest to stay sober.