Aloneinoz

I know what you mean, all my non work activities involve drinking.

We go for a long walk - plan the route so we end up at the pub.
Go for a meal - drink
Go to the cinema - buy gold class tickets so we get drinks delivered to our seats.
Picnic on the beach - take a couple of cold ones with us
Go shopping - aw my feet hurt lets grab a drink
Bowling - go to the alley that serves booze

the list goes on and on.

Holidays - we would skip WDW and drink ourselves around the world in epcot instead. How bad is that!!??!!

HOWEVER I do know that i wont be having fun formuch longer unless i stick with my new sober life. We both have a lifetimes amount of fun left in us - its time to start enjoying it 100% with our friends and family in a way that we and they deserve.

Good luck

Oz

Nuudawn

Boy did that resonate with me! In the last couple years, when posed with that question, I really started to get uncomfortable when I realized I didn't have any hobbies. I couldn't answer (honestly) when asked "what do you do for fun" either. At first when I got the question, my mind would actually just kind of blank..hmmm? What do I do? I couldn't really answer many questions to do with my life, my interests, passions, anything. And the answer eventually came...well, I guess drinking covers it all..hobbies, interests, passions, goals...yup, drinking is my life. That was an ugly truth to face.

tootsl1

Yup, ugly truth alright. But how many here would agree that is how life was before!

Dorris

Carl thanks for this, It is a valid point and a true statement and I will always try to keep this in mind when I'm stressing about occasions I won't be drinking.

lillyknitting

It's your addicted mind craving the drug. When you do decide to rid this drug from your life you will find an amazing journey lies ahead, but, be warned.... You have to WORK HARD in the early days. It does get better and easier with time and it's wonderful. Good luck

DarkDays

Going to big social event tonight, aww the pute liberation of being sober and being me , the rawness clarity just ti me us the best. Tonight ladies and gentlemen

fantail

Just wanted to add... please keep in mind that it's not just that you won't think about drinking so much once you get used to being sober. That's true, for sure! But we're also talking about very real physical changes that are going to happen to your brain with abstinence.

Alcohol floods your brain with dopamine, seratonin, and other good neurochemicals. Over time, your brain adapts to the new normal so that it takes very high levels of those chems to produce any kind of reaction. That's part of what tolerance is.

So basically right now your neurons have too many extra receptors for these chemicals, and natural levels aren't enough to make you feel good. Over time though, it will adapt to your new sober state and will go back to normal.

At four months I'm already beginning to feel the change. Music affects me like it hasn't since I was a teenager. I've started to looove scary movies because the adrenaline is super fun... I never liked them while drinking. Adrenaline just stressed me out, because my central nervous system was already so overactive to counteract the constant presence of alcohol. And lots of other things... listening to a good speech, reading something beautiful. I get feelings from those things that I used to associate only with alcohol.

Hang in there! It's hard to wrap our minds (or at least it is for me) around the fact that we can't trust our own perception, and that this healing process will change our points of view so profoundly. But it's spookily true.

Just remember this is a long play.... It definitely takes time. But by the end of three months I'd say I'd started to feel better enough that it makes it a lot easier to hang on.

Good luck. Hugs to you.

GreenEggsAndHam

Thank you all so much. I read each and every word every one of you said.

I started using alcohol so that I could enjoy myself at age 15 and am now 42. Totally can relate to the hobby thing - my "hobby" has always been drinking and I only recently realized that it's not a hobby - it's an addiction and I'm an alcoholic.

I am SO ready to love doing fun things without this monkey on my back! <3

soberlicious

Fantail is right...give your brain time to even out. I was surprised at how alive I felt (and still feel many years later). Life provides endless dopamine rushes in myriad forms. "High on life" I can't help that it's cliche...it's true!

Live2Run25

I am also 27 years old, and just over a year sober. My friends could not do ANYTHING without drinking. I mean anything. When I made the decision to stop drinking, I had to ditch my friends for a long time. I didn't think i'd enjoy anything either. Then I started seeing there is great satisfaction in remembering what happened the night before. Being able to break out of my shell and laugh and have a good time because I REALLY was having a good time. It will take some time for you to get used to this, but I promise that I have MORE fun than I did when I was drinking.

DarkDays

Not to sure what happened to my post above ipad keyboard thought I deleted it. Tonight Big social event for me, big party in hall , band , free bar and food. I am looking forward to it, how strange eh ? Well not really when you actually think about it, I just wont be drugging thats all, rawness and clarity and real laughter and fizzy water Tonight Ladies and Gentlemen I will be observing the habits of sheep with a glint in my eye, oh how very smug..sorry cannot help myself.

Sober is cool, I actually really know it is.

Pondlady

I think many of us relate to not enjoying activities without alcohol. We, who are drinking, think it's a good time....others around us do not. My husband and I were recently talking and he remembers how I would drink too much wine and fall asleep by dinner time.....leaving him alone with the evening before him

I think it's good for us to give thought to how those around us feel....... drinking really turns our thoughts inward.

wpainterw

Green Eggs:
So glad you're getting the message as to what's really going on. The addictive part of your brain gets its "fix" of alcohol or whatever and tells you that you're having "fun". As time goes on it should be more and more obvious that this is a set up. You're being set up to keep the booze ,etc. coming, If you don't do that you're told you're not having "fun." Looks like it's time to blow the whistle. Stop letting yourself be jerked around. Become independent, ready to let something other than booze be important in your life. Booze is a depressant (not really fun, quite the opposite), is expensive, and is addictive. It's a little gorilla when it moves in but eventually it grows enormous and takes over everything. Not fun.

W.

LadyinBC

For me I wasn't looking for fun when I drank. I drank by myself and all I wanted to do was to get drunk and feel nothing. If I went out with friends I would only have a few drinks and then wait until I got home to get drunk.

I didn't miss the "fun" when I quit drinking, what I missed was feeling that nothing.

Live2Run25

A good example of this: For the past 5 years i've attended a blues fest in june (where i had my last drink last year) and i've always gotten smashed! last year I have 5 BOTTLES of wine that day. This year I wanted to go, because my mom's boss is the Founder and i've been to 17 out of 18 years. I was certain that this year would SUCK because I would be sober and everyone would be wasted. Well guess what.. no one wasted. Everyone was well behaved. It just seemed like everyone was always wasted because I was. It was just my PERCEPTION of what was happening around me. It was quite an eye opening experience. Once you realize this.. you're golden. =)