One year ago....
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: South East England
Posts: 8,009
One year ago....
....I woke up fully clothed on top of my bed. I was gripped with the most overwhelming anxiety. I felt sick and ashamed and utterly hopeless that things could ever be any different for me.
I had relapsed after a couple of months of sobriety, I'd started to feel better and more optimistic about my chances of making a better life for myself, but all it took was a stressful few days at work and there I was again..hungover, and so so tired of this cycle of drinking and relapse that I couldn't seem to break. Worse this time...my marriage was really on the rocks. We were a couple of drunks and things had reached the end of the line really. Too many hurtful words, too many regrettable actions, too many evenings we just couldn't remember and the uncomfortable silences and hurt that followed them. So, on the 26th May 2012, I decided I'd had enough, and my husband followed soon after. We stopped for the sake of our marriage and for our kids.
My life now is simple. There are no dramatic vodka soaked evenings of high drama. We are a proper family...we go out together, we talk, we watch tv, I help my daughter study for her exams, I talk to them about their lives.
I am a parent. A proper concerned loving parent. I nag them about keeping their rooms tidy, I moan about them keeping glasses and plates in their bedrooms and I embarrass them by being totally uncool in front of their friends. We laugh together..... And I cannot begin to tell you just how important all those little things are to me and to them.
Thankyou to everyone here on SR for all your love and support. There is no doubt that finding this site saved me. You are all the best...keep going guys, it REALLY does get better xxx
I had relapsed after a couple of months of sobriety, I'd started to feel better and more optimistic about my chances of making a better life for myself, but all it took was a stressful few days at work and there I was again..hungover, and so so tired of this cycle of drinking and relapse that I couldn't seem to break. Worse this time...my marriage was really on the rocks. We were a couple of drunks and things had reached the end of the line really. Too many hurtful words, too many regrettable actions, too many evenings we just couldn't remember and the uncomfortable silences and hurt that followed them. So, on the 26th May 2012, I decided I'd had enough, and my husband followed soon after. We stopped for the sake of our marriage and for our kids.
My life now is simple. There are no dramatic vodka soaked evenings of high drama. We are a proper family...we go out together, we talk, we watch tv, I help my daughter study for her exams, I talk to them about their lives.
I am a parent. A proper concerned loving parent. I nag them about keeping their rooms tidy, I moan about them keeping glasses and plates in their bedrooms and I embarrass them by being totally uncool in front of their friends. We laugh together..... And I cannot begin to tell you just how important all those little things are to me and to them.
Thankyou to everyone here on SR for all your love and support. There is no doubt that finding this site saved me. You are all the best...keep going guys, it REALLY does get better xxx
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 192
Congratulations! You have a lot to be proud of, and grateful for. I have always enjoyed, appreciated and been encouraged by your posts. At almost 7 months now myself (and also having a few slips after an original two month dry period), I've followed your progress and looked to you for inspiration.
Congrats on a year, and thank you for being here.
Congrats on a year, and thank you for being here.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 2,937
I think your brilliant!
Keep going, I found I changed my thinking after I hit one year.
I love reading your posts.
I am really glad you found SR too. You make it a nice place for me.
Lots of love to you
xx
Keep going, I found I changed my thinking after I hit one year.
I love reading your posts.
I am really glad you found SR too. You make it a nice place for me.
Lots of love to you
xx
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 804
Hey Jeni,
Congrats! Having the same sobriety date and similar names, I've always felt an affinity towards you. It does feel amazing, doesn't it? While in some ways, it's been a long year, in others, it has flown by. I wouldn't have believed how much better I feel. Physically, emotionally, spiritually, everything. I too am now present in my own life. And, although it's not perfect, it's a helluva lot better.
Congrats! Having the same sobriety date and similar names, I've always felt an affinity towards you. It does feel amazing, doesn't it? While in some ways, it's been a long year, in others, it has flown by. I wouldn't have believed how much better I feel. Physically, emotionally, spiritually, everything. I too am now present in my own life. And, although it's not perfect, it's a helluva lot better.
That bell or bike person
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: london
Posts: 4,978
Jeni ,
It's great to have you around . Thankyou for sharing in a direct and open way with people . I always see compassion in your posts .
I'm so happy you and the hubby are doing this and share the journey and wish you both contiued sobriety .
Bestwishes, M
It's great to have you around . Thankyou for sharing in a direct and open way with people . I always see compassion in your posts .
I'm so happy you and the hubby are doing this and share the journey and wish you both contiued sobriety .
Bestwishes, M
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 458
*Tears rolling* Jeni I am so pleased for you, one year is amazing xx
You explain exactly how I feel this morning as you did a year ago and seeing your post tells me it is possible after so many relaspes.
I really hope you enjoy your day today
xxx
You explain exactly how I feel this morning as you did a year ago and seeing your post tells me it is possible after so many relaspes.
I really hope you enjoy your day today
xxx
Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 232
What a lovely post Jeni. I'm a mom too of teenagers and Dec 10th 2012 was the last day I drank. A glass of red wine, just like so many glasses and bottles that had gone before. For some reason I have managed to keep that as my final glass and now 5 months on I am living a very simple, sober life too.
Like you I'm a parent and now I listen and spend more time with my kids. I have to be careful that work doesn't become my new preoccupation though so there is still much room for improvement!
But thank god the sneaking around and secrecy of my drinking has stopped.
And that is still hard to believe and such a wonderful relief!!
Like you I'm a parent and now I listen and spend more time with my kids. I have to be careful that work doesn't become my new preoccupation though so there is still much room for improvement!
But thank god the sneaking around and secrecy of my drinking has stopped.
And that is still hard to believe and such a wonderful relief!!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,678
Words cannot express how grateful I am for you and your continued sobriety Jeni. This place just wouldn't be the same without you. Massive congratulations for your first sober birthday (and your hubby's too), may you have many more to come x
7 
x7 
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