Omnom

Yeah... I cant beleive it.. I can usually go about 4-5. I had the itch really bad yesterday and I made it. I guess it pays to have all of my money tied up into my new apartment. Im broke and couldnt score. (Not for lack of trying cause I did try and find some even without the money) I woke up today though not having used yesterday and I am actually impressed with myself. Probably the longest stretch thus far. Hopefully I can keep going.

Im no longer dating that guy anymore and Im kind of upset about it. I just feel so SAD today. I want to be loved and feel respected. I really wanted him to be the one. He hates me. I did go psycho on him. I have made myself look so bad. I showed a side I didnt even know I had.. I dont think it was me UGH. I want him back Usually this would have triggered me into a WHOA is me.. MUST get HIGH spiral.

Trying to be positive about things but every time i turn around I feel like people are deliberately hurting me which in turn makes me want to get high.


I will be getting my apartment next week and I am so scared. I have to keep telling myself that I cant get high occasionally anymore because I need to put all my money into my apartment and stuff. I think I may have jumped and got the apartment a little to early in my recovery but I did it in hopes of tricking myself by tying up my money will be the trick.
I have been living with family since December because I had lost my job in october and couldnt afford my apartment anymore while smoking crack (WHO CAN??)

Excuse the ramble just kinda want someone to talk to right now and maybe give advice?

shirlygirly

Congratulations on eight days! Things can only go up from here, so hang in there.

I'm on Day 30 of being sober today, and a little less than two weeks into my sobriety my long-term boyfriend dumped me. It was horrible. It's also the first breakup I've ever been through where I didn't drink to cope with it.

What I've come to realize is that even if he was the one for me, or IS the one for me, it wouldn't have worked out unless I got clean and sober on my own first. I need to be healthy as an individual before I can have a healthy, functional relationship.

As for the apartment, try and relax, because you know for a fact that too much stress will trigger a relapse.

Are you going to NA? If not, you should be going to meetings daily.

<3 <3 <3

Omnom

I have not gone to meetings. Im afraid that if i do I will just meet new people to use with. Im sorry about your boyfriend but yes I agree you should take care of yourself first. Im trying to do the same.

shirlygirly

I understand your fear of finding people to use with, but I think you should still give it a try.

I've been to NA before, but decided on AA as my fellowship instead. Why not go to the next NA meeting, introduce yourself to the meeting's chairperson, and ask that person to put you in touch with a potential sponsor?

coming_clean

My advice:

Keep it up, you're going a great job.

Take things one day at a time, don't grasp everything all at once.

Omnom

maybe. Im not sure about the meetings. Your not the first to tell me these things either. Im really scared.