Threshold

Think of what you would tell anyone who has undergone a tragedy that brought about the loss of health, wealth or security, because that essentially IS what active addiction is, a tragedy, a huge long ugly chronic health problem.

Lost a home to a hurricane, lost all on a bad investment, had a bad accident participating in a sport....these things happen. We make a choice that leads to loss...building a home on a flood plain, taking a ski trip, investing in a dot com company...on and on.

Then we find ourselves holding the bag and wondering what if. So what do you tell anyone else who is holding their version of that bag?

The only way is forward. We can waste another decade mired in guilt, or head banging and hand wringing but it's just throwing good money and energy after bad. The best thing to do is to accept the reality and move forward in the direction we want to go.

Natom

I once tried to add up all the money wasted on booze, drugs and gambling. When I had a rough idea I figured I could have bought a nice apartment and car in full. That didn't bother me much. Money is money. It comes and goes. What really hit me was the time, which was relatively short in comparison to others. But the 7 years since I left school. I had to just write them off. I haven't really done anything in them except fail at my feeble attempts to progress in life. But now essentially I'm right at the beginning again. And that's the best place to start a story.

Natom.

Womble76

Regret - treat it as a dog would. If you can't eat it or hump it, p*ss on it and walk away.

Love that phrase, it's helping me a bit at the moment.

least

Coldfusion

Actually, dealing with regrets is a part of the AA program.

mwstylee

I also have a lot of regrets. Although for me, I regret wasting years of my life being drunk. I was supposed to be living life but instead I spent years and years in la-la land being a stupid drunk. I can never get that time back. Money can be earned, but you can't create more time.

Delilah1

Love it too.

artsoul

When all else fails, try gratitude for what you do have. It works!

leastofthese

I have a lot of regrets, too. I believe God has forgiven me, but what do I do with all of the things I did with others when I was drunk? For me, the more I stay away from the bars and restaurants where I drank gives me the hopes that people I drank with will forget about me. One of the stupid things I did when I drank was to send stupid, inappropriate texts to people. I am going to apologize to these people the next time I see them.

EternalQ

I too have many regrets. And big messes I'm still cleaning up.

It finally occurred to me that the way to get past it was to ask myself for forgiveness,
and to make and keep a promise to myself that I will never do it again. To re~earn my own trust.

In other words, to commit to real change.
This sounds glib and goofy but it has worked for me.