Hurting...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Somewhere in CT
Posts: 6
Hurting...
Hello all,
Today I found out that my fiance has returned to his old crack addiction. I too have used but coke (sniffed)was my choice so far 11 almost 12 yrs have passed and I'm still sober. Now I'm not sure about how to handle this situation with my fiance. I was shocked and am still in denial as he just finished inpatient treatment last week. Where do I go from here? HELP NEEDED PLEASE
Today I found out that my fiance has returned to his old crack addiction. I too have used but coke (sniffed)was my choice so far 11 almost 12 yrs have passed and I'm still sober. Now I'm not sure about how to handle this situation with my fiance. I was shocked and am still in denial as he just finished inpatient treatment last week. Where do I go from here? HELP NEEDED PLEASE
Last edited by Buttersgirl68; 02-13-2013 at 08:10 PM. Reason: needed to add last line
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
Hi Buttersgirl
I'm sorry for your situation.
I see you've already been to our Family and Friends forum.
I think the advice most of us will give you, here or there, is to look after yourself.
ask yourself honestly if you think anything is likely to change, ask yourself how much you're prepared to put up with, and ask yourself what kind of relationship is it you think you deserve....how far does this one fall short?
Its not easy and you have some tough thinking ahead - but there's a lot of support here...you're not alone
D
I'm sorry for your situation.
I see you've already been to our Family and Friends forum.
I think the advice most of us will give you, here or there, is to look after yourself.
ask yourself honestly if you think anything is likely to change, ask yourself how much you're prepared to put up with, and ask yourself what kind of relationship is it you think you deserve....how far does this one fall short?
Its not easy and you have some tough thinking ahead - but there's a lot of support here...you're not alone
D
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 352
Buttergirl... I am sorry you have found yourself here, but welcome. You have some tough decisions to make, remember that you can only affect your own behaviour, and its important that you take care of you first. I hope you find some answers on this site, people really do want to help if they can.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
It's not for you to "handle". It's for him to "handle". Your own sobriety is an enormous, impressive achievement! Guard it well. It's a fantastic investment, worth all the gold you could carry. You would certainly be of no use to your fiance (quite the contrary!) if you relapsed. But you can't make him quit, can't even help him quit, unless he really wants to quit and is determined to quit. Then you can give him all the support he deserves. Sounds a bit like that movie, "When a Man Loves a Woman", but with the roles reversed.
W.
W.
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