bemyself

Yes, I've been doing the pouring it down the sink thing ad nauseum lately - I'm sure I'm boring others here in mentioning it, 'cause I'm sure as hell boring myself :-)

Davey, I agree with those who are applauding you for making that pour-it-out decision, and hope that you too can get to your previous mark of 2 months. Know what you mean about anxiety too, it's one of the big obstacles for early sobriety.

Well done to you, persevering with it as you are!

DaveyT

Feeling better today, the anxiety is starting to subside although my previous experience says i'll get another peak of it around days 9-10 but at least I'm prepared for that. It's such a relief to feel that horrible little monster letting go of me for a bit. It makes staying sober a lot easier, although I know not to become complacent.

The general aches and pains are pretty bad at the moment but I expect them to go off in a few more days. Taking paracetemol and ibuprofen to help and a nice hot shower seems to relieve some of the aching. I slept better last night, the night sweats are still present but at least last night it wasn't so awful that I had to wake up and sleep on the floor. I'll be very happy when they are finally gone again, having to change the bedding on a daily basis really sucks.

Bit of a headache going on as well, but still staying strong, I want to drink but I know I can resist it tonight. It's nice to be at the point where occasionally I know I can resist without being worried. Tomorrow will be another day of course, cravings seem to come and go in the most unpredictable and extreme waves.

Thanks for all the wise words. I know I've said it before but the relief of having people who understand is hard to put into words.

DaveyT

You're not boring me, I'm actually relieved that someone else has done this more than once. It feels so stupid to buy alcohol and then pour it away, sort of a "what am I doing to myself" moment. My toilet seems to have had more to drink than I have lately lol.

At least we realise that the alcohol is the enemy. Drinking any amount is bad but I think it's better to drink a small amount, realise what you're doing and throw it away rather then go on a massive bender. It's not great, but it's a positive step. That's how I'm trying to see it.

That is something else I have learned from people here, both reading their stories and in the direct replies to mine. Concentrate on the little successes rather than the failures.

Fandy

if you know the anxiety is going to come down on you either of those days, put something in place now to counter-act it....maybe have a plan with a friend or a movie ready for the time, a small enjoyable project you are working on to keep you focused during the time.

DaveyT

Unfortunately due to a physical health condition I have which is unrelated to the alcohol I am unable to leave the house very often (collapsing from exhaustion is common). However you are right I need to put something in place and I am working on that. If I invite friends they will bring alcohol so this won't work.

I think a new hobby I can do from home may be an idea. Maybe something artistic