pooky

It has been 6 weeks since I had a drink. Have been going to AA meetings the whole time,getting ready to start the steps this week with my sponsor.
It has not gotten any easier to resist drinking.I just wanna go hang out with my hubby and enjoy some wine and hang out to pass the time.
I know that I can do that if I want to but I don't wanna blow the past 6 weeks,have a hangover,be remorseful,hurt the people who are so proud of me,etc....I have been exercising ,eating right and everything else I know to do.
Dont know why Im posting this..guess just to get it out.
pook

legna

Periods of abstinance doesn't make not having a drink easier for a "hopeless" alcoholic. Exercise, eating right, etc., simply keeps the compulsion from being exacerbated. For an alcoholic of my type, sobriety and the peace of mind and serenity that comes with it requires a spiritual solution.

I found that solution in the twelve steps. The honesty, open-mindedness and willingness necessary to work the twelve steps required me to have put some distance between myself and my last drink. Once dried out, I was able to make a start. It was only through working the steps to the best of my ability that I was able to transcend the obsession and compulsion that leads so many through the revolving door.

I am happy for you that are about to begin the steps. Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed this path.

hypochondriac

You'll get there Pooky I found that my cravings didn't go away if I paid too much attention to them. Sounds silly but 'ignore them and they'll go away' really does work for me x

Dee74

Hi Pooky

I kept relapsing for years - I finally worked out I'd stop drinking but do nothing else.
I was a drinker, living a drinkers life...just not drinking.

It was pretty inevitable I'd drink again, looking back.

You're smarter than me - you're doing AA and checking in here...obviously if you have a sponsor they're the person to ask about this...

but I still think it's a good question...

why are you unhappy not drinking?
what needs to change?
is there more in your life you should be looking at?

D

Thepatman

Your lifestyle needs to change if it's causing issues. Find new hobbies with your husband, take dancing lessons, Go play badminton, anything different then a dinner at a restaurant if that was your groove when drinking. Just my 50 cents ;-)
Stay atrong!

pooky

thanks Dee
Not really sure why Im not happy sober. A lot of it is boredom I think.But on the other hand Im being lazy..I could be doing something constructive. Never been a hobby person.
Just feel like cuttin loose sometimes..nothin really wrong with my life..Guess im fortunate in that respect.
Need to figure it out though

Anna

I hope that things will become more clear to you Pookie, as you continue on the recovery journey.

Delilah1

Hi Pooky,

You and I are almost at the same place in our sobriety. I have found exercise and reading help me fill the time I would have been drinking. Apparently being on SR also takes up some of that time considering I have so many darn posts!!!

Hope you find something you can enjoy.

IndaMiricale

It didnt take weeks for us to get where we were in our drinking career. So it doesnt fade just like that, as fast as we would like. Specially being alcoholics we want instant gratification.

It truly does fade little by little. But I have a bit of time and still think how nice it would be to have a couple. HA then I think yea that would be the day. A couple never in my life time. Work those steps and just focus on today. Just dont drink today.

I would tell myself sometimes well maybe tomorrow. Then maybe tomorrow, I just would live in today. And little by little days turned into weeks, and then months..

You can live free , pooky.. Good and Great things are to come for you , as long as you do the next right thing, and dont pick up that first one.

Xune

Instead of a glass of wine with your husband, why not enjoy a nice cup of tea or soda / ice and lime?

sugarbear1

Alcohol was my solution to living life. Once it was gone, why would I have expected to be happy?

Without a new solution to living, there really was nothing to be happy about. I was miserable and I made it to day 12 when I found my first sponsor and we worked the 12 steps on days 14 & 15.

That is when I slowly began to become happy. Old habits had to be noticed, addressed, and then changed.

Those steps saved my life. I have worked steps 4-9 four times in 18 months.....all with different intents, but each time relief and freedom came to me.

Life is totally awesome today no matter what happens!

2granddaughters

Hello pooky.
You know in AA's HOW IT WORKS where it says "We stood at the turning point, we asked HIS protection and care with complete abandon" ... I think you are standing there now. I know I have stood there numerous times in recovery.

When I get to that point (after all my self-will and fighting to get my own way have failed) I get on my knees and ask for God's help with all my heart (as best I can, that's all that's required) and I recommit myself to AA.

Have you told your sponsor and the trusted oldtimers in your group just how you feel? I would .....

PM me if you want. Warning!!.. I'll give you AA advice as I understand it today.

All the best.

Bob R