t7990348

I've been binge drinking for quite some time, I can't remember the last time I spent 1 whole weekend without getting drunk. I don't drink during the week, don't crave alcohol during the week, but friday or saturday rolls around, and I can't control myself, I just want to get wasted. I always tell myself, " I won't get as drunk tonight as I did last weekend", but in reality, I have no control over how drunk I'm going to get. and it is becoming scary.

Went to a neighborhood party the other weekend and planned on drinking quite a bit, but didn't expect to make an a@# out of myself. But I did! I was told I did around 15 ice ludge shots in a row of all different sorts of liqour. That's just not normal! When I get blacked out, I continue to drink and drink no matter how wasted I am.

Last night I went out to the bar, started at 7, and once the bars closed at 2, it wasn't enough, I needed more. Everyone else was ready to go home and I wanted to go to the strip bar so I could drink more and stay out. Got home and was in search for alcohol. Found a wine cooler and put it down. Still wasn't enough. I texted people to see if they wanted to come drink with me! and of course noone did because it was 3 in the morning and noone wants to drink at that time of the night, except me.

I dissapoint my parents because they know I can't control my drinking, and they are probably very concerned whenever I go out with friends because they know ill be drinking. I don't want them to be ashamed anymore, and I don't want to put them, or myself through it anymore

I have countless stories where I have been blacked out and done regretful things. I've had numerous times where I should have probably died from consuming so much alcohol. I'm lucky to be alive.

EVERYTIME, the day after I drink, I feel so much guilt, and embarrassment. I decided to post on here because I feel very depressed and hopeless.I know I need to stop binge drinking or I will end up dead. Knowing that you would think it'd be enough to stop, but it isn't. I'll tell myself I wont drink next weekend, but I would probably be lying.

By the end of next week, I will have convinced myself that I don't have a problem, and that the regret and guilt is all in my head and everyone does stupid stuff when there drink, but that's a LIE. I'm scared

I need an alternative, and something to do that will stop me from texting people, and trying to go out and drink on the weekends. I feel like drinking is the only thing anyone ever does, and quite honestly it's what a lot of people do, but they can control their drinking, and I can't. I know I'm an alcoholic. Someone please help


I've been to AA in the past and i don't really like it that much, maybe I should give it a try again, but I don't know anyone who goes, or where to go. Really dont wanna go by myself either

just got a really good job that pays very well, and I need to get my life together and stop the binge drinking. I want to be sober and clear headed. I don't want to regret what I did the night before, and I don't want to feel the shame anymore.

So when next weekend rolls around, WHAT am I gonna DO! to stop myself from going out and drinking??

DoubleBarrel

It sounds like you want someone else to fix this for you.
Have you had enough yet?
It sounds like you have some unfortunate consequences from your drinking, and you realize it's not within normal ranges, but what will it take for you to decide to quit?

This has the ability to become a vicious cycle that will be an unbelievable descent. You are already out of control once you start drinking. You have jail, illness, injury and death further down the road you are on. Not necessarily soon or all at once, but it's out there.

So the question is, what are you willing to do?

Dee74

hi and welcome t7990348

I think one of the first things to do to get out of that weekend cycle is realise you need to make some changes.

Maybe it's changes in the people you hang around with, or maybe it's changes in the places or types of things you regularly go to - maybe it's finding new sober people at AA or some other recovery group...

but I can tell you as an all weekend warrior myself if all you do is the same old things you'll simply get the same old results.

I don't know how old you are - but I kept putting of the changes I knew I needed to make until I was 40...thats not a good look believe me, and it's not a good road to go down.

A lot of people check in here pretty regularly on the weekends - I think you could do worse than to do that too

Check out our Class of November thread for other people trying to quit this month

D

Georgiaonmymind

Quit going out and find a hobby... Like bird watching

t7990348

Thanks for the response guys. I know that noone else can fix this except myself, but I want some advice on what I should do.

I don't even have to be around anyone, I just get a sudden urge to get drunk on the weekend and I'll try to find anything to do that involves drinking. Most all of my friends drink on the weekends. One of my closest, best friends is an alcoholic also, but he is trying to stop as well. He had a few bad episodes lately, but I tried hanging out with him last weekend so we could hangout and do something other than drink, and found out he had been drinking behind my back, then I started drinking with him. Me and him together could be a good thing or could be disasterous.

I will definitely get on this forum when the weekend comes.

BTW, I'm 22 years old.

Georgiaonmymind

So why exactly do you like to get 100% plastered? I only drink so I can take my mind off work and the fact that I have no friends and can't keep a relationship going. So that's anywhere from 2-6 beers quickly fallowed by sleep hahaha.

Everyone has there reasons for what they do, I'd try to figure that out friend and see if you can't correct it.

Richie1977

22 years old, your really just starting out in life, you have a choice that you need to make. Don't get to 32 years of age and wonder why your having physical and mental health issues, financial problems, relationship problems, and a whole lot more.
I hope you make the right decision. There is a lot of support on here for you.
Best of luck

Edabisco

For me, reading SR and other sobriety literature has been really helpful, especially in maintaining that knowledge that I do have a problem. You described almost to a tee 11 years of my life, and like you I'd have moments of clarity, normally the next day, where I'd know what I'd done was not healthy, or that I had a problem, was an alcoholic, needed to stop. Can't tell you how many times I googled an AA schedule. But when Friday rolled around I'd convinced myself that other people did it, I was fine, and it started all over again. Reading about other people's experiences - and continuing to read about them - convinced me that I do have a problem. It makes that first step, which we're always working on, easier. It's really true that you've got to avoid that first drink, which you'll find is maybe easier than you thought once you've committed to sobriety (though not easy.....). What's impossible for me is not taking that second drink, or third, or fourth......

t7990348

I can't really think of any reasons as to why I like to get wasted. I think partially it has to do with the fact that on the weekends I feel lonely and the only way to feel like I am connecting, or socializing is to go out and drink. I probably drink to get drunk because down inside I really want a relationship with a girl, and have been screwed over multiple times by girls, and sometime it feels as if i'll never find the right one. I haven't actually had a real relationship since I was 18, and that ended badly. She cheated on me, and broke my heart and even though it's been many years, I guess it still bothers me just because I really had a connection with this girl and she didn't feel the same apparently.

Other than that, I can't really think of anything. I have great parents, a great home, a great job, and mostly everything I could ask for.

I used to mess with pills, and ended up going to rehab to stop. I feel like I've traded one habit for another. I messed with pills a couple times in the past few months but nothing major. But I can't do pills at all because I know it will ruin my life, and also my job will be at risk. I can get drug tested at any time. So I haven't done a pill in 3 weeks. I was close to doing one last night because I was around someone who got some, but I didn't. Instead I planned on getting drunk

When I came out of rehab 2 years ago, I felt awesome. I was going to church and was clean and sober for almost 3 months. then I started slowly drinking again, and it wasn't long before my addictive behavior was back. My drinking has gotten progressively worst it seems.

Anyways, I am pretty much just rambling but it feels good to let stuff out, especially to people who have been in my situation and are now clean. I hope I can kick this horrible cycle

jstar

First of all, welcome to SR! It sounds like you have found yourself in the right place - it is quite a realization that we come to when we realize that our drinking is out of control. It doesn't matter how old we are or how many days a week we drink - it's what happens to us when we do drink. I was a blackout drinker too for about the last year of my drinking. It was so scary & depressing, shameful....etc etc...that I too look back & have a hard time wondering why all the things that happened to me or how much of a b**** i was to people in my life, didn't stop me from doing it all over again. Day after day. I was pretty much a daily drinker and a binger on the weekends or when there was other people around me.

You mentioned having tried AA before, so you obviously realize this is an issue for you. Why not give it another try? I went in & out of the revolving doors of AA for 2 years before I have finally put 99 days together...in a row!

It is possible to break this cycle, you just have to be willing to do whatever it takes

Someone else mentioned finding something new to do...I can relate to this being very difficult to do, at least for me still in early sobriety it is hard. I have been realizing more & more lately that pretty much everything in my life before getting sober, revolved in some way or another around alcohol. So I got myself a Sponsor in AA with 20+ years of sobriety to help me, and I go to meetings (even if it's uncomfortable) and hang out after & talk to people. I've been making lists of things that I would like to try & do/accomplish, things that when I was drinking I would have thought were boring because they don't involve alcohol.

There is a clear & beautiful gift of life waiting for you...I hope you check in here and post. reach out for help if needed all my best for you~

awuh1

I’ll tell you some things you can do but you won’t like it. It's almost guaranteed to get you on the right path.... but.....Alcoholics hate doing anything that is not their idea. Given what you have shared, this is the best plan with specifics that I can come up with.

1)This week tell everyone (or most everyone) you know that you are going to quit drinking. 2) tomorrow, call your local AA office and tell them you need a schedule for local meetings. 3) go to a meeting every single day for the next three months (two of them on Fridays Saturdays and Sundays if necessary). 4) find 2 or more sober people you can hang out with for the entire weekend (for at least the next 4 weekends). Tell them you will clean their house, fix their car, ANYTHING to just be around them when you would normally drink. 5) post at least once a day right here to let everyone know how you are doing.

Sounds drastic? You bet. I’m being as serious about this as the jails, nut houses and the morgue…. because sooner or later that’s where your drinking is going to take you.

So there are 5 things to get you started. Good luck. Keep us posted.

Lionhearted1

Hi and welcome, your story is very very similar to mine, i was a binge drinker only on weekends at 21-25 then i was an everyday drinker plus a binge drinker, i know exactly what you are saying i used to actually drink faster and more in black out, I use to be told that i stopped mixing the drinks and started drinking from the bottle at a certain point, i just could not satisfy that thirst!

The anxiety and hangovers get WORSE alot worse, the consequences get worse i have done things that i thought i would never do due to drinking. and the worst thing about this disease is you know you may die or ruin your life and hurt the ones closest too you but you still do it! No one on this site can stop you binge drink, we can give advice and encouragement but its an inside job!

YOU HAVE TO WANT TO CHANGE; YOU HAVE TO WANT TO STOP!!!

My only advice would be dig deep, read as much about alcoholism as possible, under the influence is a great book, read the big book of alcoholics anonymous, read a lot of threads there are some amazing people on this site!! Good luck!

If you feel aa is not for you try avrt or smart!!

healthylife87

You sound a lot like me, except I would drink 1 day during the week usually, as well as the weekends but I would hardly ever drink to the point of blacking out. I did do embarrassing things though and fight with my bf. From what I have seen on these boards, it starts out how we were drinking and progresses to worse and worse. I want to get a handle on it before it gets that bad and you should too! I have just been checking these boards daily and keeping busy with exercise and work. If that isn't enough for you, you should definitely check out some of the things the others are suggesting. Best of luck to you!

Anna

Welcome and I'm glad you recognize you are addicted to alcohol.

My advice is to make changes in your life. Plan ahead, plan something for the weekend that is totally different. You will need to make changes as far as places you go and people you are with. How about getting involved in sports, do some volunteer work in your community, do something to help out a family member or neighbor, anything that is different than your normal weekend routine.

Keep searching till you find a recovery method that works for you. And, know that you can do this!

hypochondriac

Welcome to SR t7990348

There is something Allen Carr always says about addiction which I think is quite useful... that we don't drink for the reasons we shouldn't...

It sounds like you have convinced yourself that you need alcohol to help you enjoy the weekend. I had to remove a lot of the myths surrounding alcohol in order to get better. It is easier said than done, especially if you have been relying on drinking for a long time and to be honest most people seem to think alcohol is essential to enjoyment. Not so, but it takes effort to retrain your thought patterns. It would certainly help you to check out some recovery literature... AA, SMART and AVRT... just try and find something you can relate to. And spend every minute of the weekend here. That way you won't feel lonely x

least

I don't believe that we all have to hit 'rock bottom' before we want to change. Some of us quit before we've lost everything. My bottom was emotional - I couldn't live with hating myself all the time.

As for what to do, maybe do some things that don't involve drinking. I don't go out much so can't offer suggestions, but know that there are lots of things to do without drinking.


Welcome to SR!

Twenties

I'm 21 man and you sound like me. getting plastered on the weekends, i was the life of the party, starting chants at bars, basically acting a fool, but everyone loved me. I have bad social anxiety though, so when i was sober, i sucked and could never get a girl.
i showed off how i could pound down liquor, and thought everyone was impressed-they really dont care that much. After the years of drinking, there was no real relationships, just meaningless drunk hookups. its not real

Just commit to sobriety it before it gets too late...do it. seriously. take my word for it. if you have family that cares, let them know you have a problem. it was the hardest but best decision of my life.

Boo92

Hi I can totally relate to yur story. I've signed up to this forum only today myself. I dot drink everyday or even every week but when I do I just don't know how to stop and am always the last one looking for the party. It's a binge drinkin cycle and for ages I didn't think I had a problem cuz lots of ppl, young ppl especially with no children to look after, so most of my social peer group, I'm 26 myself, loads of my peer group drink every weekend and get pissed. But just not to the point where I do. I am always waking up and having to ask everyone 'what did I do? Did I do anything embarrassing?' I find this the hardest not cuz it completely takes away any dignity or self respect and I think how ppl must see me :/
Today is my first day of the rest of my sober life and I'm goin to have to learn to be me without drink, and how to have fun without the drink. I think it's possible.
If u like stay on touch and we'll do it together, everyone on here is doing it together and that's the most important thing. The support on here is invaluable.
Good luck!

goldiilocks

I too am a binge drinker... I've know I was an alcoholic for about 4 years now, despite me denying it a couple of days after every bender. For me, it just got worse and worse and my binges would get longer and more uncontrollable. I dont really know what to tell you as far as advice goes because although I am not new to trying to stay sober, I have not succeeded very well so far. All I can really say is, for me, it got worse and to the point where I would no longer want to go out to binge drink and I would rather do it in the comfort of my home... I dont know if you are in my age group but I am 24 and I find that it's easy for us to deny our problem because during these years everyone is partying and whatnot and our disease might still be in the earlier stages. I think the hardest part is admiting that you have a problem to yourself, at least for me that has been the hardest even though there have been blaring signs and signals in my face for a while. I wish you well and you will find support here.

sugarbear1

I found this: CDC - Frequently Asked Questions - Alcohol

while searching this: binge drinking dsm V

There's an on-going debate in the medical community as to whether or not binge drinking (or periodic drinking) should be added to the DSM V and exactly how it should be added (new edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders will be published in 2013---the book of psychiatric disorders and definitions).

You found SR, stick around with us!!