RobC420

In my experience, it was mostly me to him at first, but over time it became more of a two way thing. If I ever called they answered or called me back as soon as possible. They never left me hanging.

lilac0721

Well, I just met with a woman who I hope will continue to be my sponsor. She asked me to call her at a regular time every day, just to check in. She also said that if she's not available or I don't hear back from her within a short time, to call another woman from the group just so that I am checking in with people and learning to connect to people rather than isolate.
Hope that helps!

miamifella

I let a lot of sponsors go because I did not know that in my area, sponsors rarely if ever contact sponsees.

I did not know this and thought that they did not want to be my sponsor since they never contacted me.

I recommend having a discussion with any sponsor about what their expectations are and how they operate.

Weasel1966

In general, communciation is not a one way street.

I placed two calls with no response.

I will go to my meeting this evening. I have no intention of calling in this morning. I dont particularly care if this is the way he "works" i think its rude. And to have had a discussion about my rough times and provide no inquiry at all speaks volumns.

He has no obligation to me nor I to him. But I thought there was a realative freindship building.

I have a busy work day and no time to mess around with BS like who called who. Time to move on today.

Have a good day everyone.

K

pipparina

I agree Ken. Some of the old school ways did not work for me. I found it rude and unhelpful. I needed someone who was sensitive to my struggle against alcohol and living a sober life, especially in early sobriety. The drill Sargent method was just too hard for me.

So there is a gentler way, and I managed 14+ years having gentle sponsors.

Weasel1966

So I decided that since I am all about communication I think finding another sponsor that is a bit more interactive is needed in my case.

How do you tell a sponsor that you are going to find another?

Mark75

That.

Mark75

It happens all the time... Your sponsor wants you sober and recovered. A good sponsor is not doing this for any other reason. I know, it's hard, I needed to change sponsors once and I kind of obsessed about for a while... My first sponsor and I are still very friendly and we speak often with each other.

Weasel1966

Well.... I should be worried about me today and instead I have this other stuff now.

His lack of interest is what it is. I will move along. Learning to manage my expectations.

MIRecovery

My suggestion is to find a new sponsor first before letting go of the old one. Sort of like a job. A crappy job is better than no job

nobshere

Weasel...my suggestion is to take your time in finding a new sponsor..unfortunately it was my experience that many take on a role they have no business being in.

FreeFall

Sounds like the guy might be an option for a future friendship, just not what you need in role of sponsor. He may have had stuff of his own to deal with, but it seems like someone ready to be a good sponsor could carve out some time to respond to you. I agree with Nobshere to take some time in finding the right person.

Good luck on your busy day at work. I can't seem to get motivated to do anything at all today except read.

Weasel1966

He finally called me at lunch. I called him back. He explained that he did not tell me the protocols and should have earlier.

He is a great guy. I think he does care. Just things got a little messed up with communications.

I have two phone lists. He will be checking off some names of the more responsible folks for me as back ups.

Personally I hate cold calling anyone. If I need support it will be here with my SR family. I have come to rely on you. I hope you know you can rely on me.