Day 1- I'm a drunk, an alcoholic. I need to stop.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: NY Metro
Posts: 20
Originally Posted by missingtheoldme 
wow...so happy to have found someone on day 1....I relate. I am so happy you also decided to talk today.
I am a closet alcoholic..it has gotten really really bad...I now drink spirits straight and I need to stop. I look awful and feel awful. My boyfriend doesn't know and I am scared. Today is day 1 and I want to tell him but I am so ashamed. I ask myself how will I live without alcohol. I feel like ok I can probably stop drinking but not when I go out and I know I have to because I have such an addiction. I have been a drinker for many years but now I have hit bottom. I need advice please..so bad. My parents would be shocked and they will wonder if I go to their house and dont have wine with dinner. I also wonder if I can ever have fun going out without alcohol. My boyfriend could care less about alcohol and is always the dd. He would never drink again if it helped me I know that. Sitting here crying because I feel so lost. (my kids know I drink but know they have no idea how bad it is...or maybe they do)
I am a closet alcoholic..it has gotten really really bad...I now drink spirits straight and I need to stop. I look awful and feel awful. My boyfriend doesn't know and I am scared. Today is day 1 and I want to tell him but I am so ashamed. I ask myself how will I live without alcohol. I feel like ok I can probably stop drinking but not when I go out and I know I have to because I have such an addiction. I have been a drinker for many years but now I have hit bottom. I need advice please..so bad. My parents would be shocked and they will wonder if I go to their house and dont have wine with dinner. I also wonder if I can ever have fun going out without alcohol. My boyfriend could care less about alcohol and is always the dd. He would never drink again if it helped me I know that. Sitting here crying because I feel so lost. (my kids know I drink but know they have no idea how bad it is...or maybe they do)
Powerless over Alcohol
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Trudging the Road to Happy Destiny!
Posts: 4,018
Welcome to both you and missingtheoldme 
I drank daily till I was 39. And in the last decade I had lost everything due to it. The sobriety road isnt easy but it is easier then trying to juggle all the other things when the only thing I was worried about was that next drink..
AA has saved this alcoholic , and given me a life that I gave up all hope of .
I drank daily till I was 39. And in the last decade I had lost everything due to it. The sobriety road isnt easy but it is easier then trying to juggle all the other things when the only thing I was worried about was that next drink..
AA has saved this alcoholic , and given me a life that I gave up all hope of .
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 14,934
Welcome to SR!
After thinking it wasn't for me I finally gave up and tried AA. I needed some face to face support from non judgmental people who understood how difficult it was for me to stay quit. I found that in AA. Together with this website I've managed to string together a decent amount of sober time. You can too!
After thinking it wasn't for me I finally gave up and tried AA. I needed some face to face support from non judgmental people who understood how difficult it was for me to stay quit. I found that in AA. Together with this website I've managed to string together a decent amount of sober time. You can too!
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
Reading and posting here really helped calm my anxiety. I knew I was in the company of people who truly understood what I was feeling. I hope you'll find encouragement and hope by being with us. Glad to have you as part of the family, Underthevolcano.
Welcome to you, missingtheoldme. You've found a great place. You can do this.
Welcome to you, missingtheoldme. You've found a great place. You can do this.
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
Missingtheoldme, I learned that nobody cares if I decide not to drink. I also learned that I can have a great time when I go out and not drink. The idea that I needed to drink, at any time, was a lie I told myself, and one I listened to.
You can stop listening to and acting on those lies if you choose to. You have that ability and power within you to put it down and never pick it up. Keep posting, there is a lot of support for you here.
You can stop listening to and acting on those lies if you choose to. You have that ability and power within you to put it down and never pick it up. Keep posting, there is a lot of support for you here.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 3
Hi Underthevolcano,
Your user name...I always watched that movie on benders, when I got all self-loathing. That one and others made me feel not so isolated in my "condition". I would have read the book, but I can't read drunk.
A sad sack watching a sad sack...now that's living!
A challenge to you...stay sober long enough to revisit your namesake with a clear mind. It might hit home in a different way.
Your user name...I always watched that movie on benders, when I got all self-loathing. That one and others made me feel not so isolated in my "condition". I would have read the book, but I can't read drunk.
A sad sack watching a sad sack...now that's living!
A challenge to you...stay sober long enough to revisit your namesake with a clear mind. It might hit home in a different way.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 143
Originally Posted by IndaMiricale
Welcome to both you and missingtheoldme
I drank daily till I was 39. And in the last decade I had lost everything due to it. The sobriety road isnt easy but it is easier then trying to juggle all the other things when the only thing I was worried about was that next drink..
AA has saved this alcoholic , and given me a life that I gave up all hope of .
I drank daily till I was 39. And in the last decade I had lost everything due to it. The sobriety road isnt easy but it is easier then trying to juggle all the other things when the only thing I was worried about was that next drink..
AA has saved this alcoholic , and given me a life that I gave up all hope of .
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
