Lily71

Hello,

So glad I found this online community. I have been seeing a counselor for the loss of my dad recently and I am working through that. But, a week ago I've discovered my daughter has bulimia. I found out when our dogs were in her garbage in her room and drug out at least 10 empty boxes of laxatives. When she came home, and I asked her about them she completely closed up, became very angry at me, and said she has been eating and throwing up for a very long time plus taking laxatives. The boxes our dogs found were over time she said. She was mad because she didn't eat for 13 days one time and no one noticed.

Her father was an alcoholic until the day he died, and the frustration and helplessness instantly came back to me with her. When I asked if she wanted to talk to someone she immediately said she didn't have a problem and I couldn't tell her what to do. (where have I heard that before????)

My counselor suggested I find a community of others who've experienced the same thing to talk to for support. I thought about posting in the eating disorder portion but I am not sure.

Any suggestions ?

thank you so much.

least

I would think you'd get more responses in the eating disorders forum but feel free to post anywhere.

Welcome to our recovery family! :ghug3

Dee74

Hi Lily - welcome!

You'll certainly find a lot of support here

Like least said we have an ED forum - you may wish to check that out too

Eating Disorders - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

D

Anna

Hi,

Welcome!

I'm sorry for the difficult times you and your daughter are going through. I hope thay she will recognize she has an eating disorder and seek help for herself. I'm not sure how old she is, but a good place to start might be to talk to your family dr and get his advice. And, yes, you might also want to check out the Eating Disorder forum on these boards.

Hevyn

We're so glad you're here, Lily. I'm not very well-versed on eating disorders, but I'm sure someone will make some suggestions. One thing's for sure, you aren't alone anymore. Hoping you'll find comfort in that.

icanwin

Lily I am not qualified to give advice fir your difficult case. But as someone else said, you are not alone.

"When it's dark enough you can see the stars"...and you will see the stars one day :-)

Rossy

Hello Lily.

DisplacedGRITS

i Liliy. i'm 31 and i am bulimic. i have been for about 8 years now. it's a daily struggle and one i haven't sought help for because my alcoholism took center stage for so long. from what i've come to understand about myself, it's a control issue and a self esteem issue. i have terrible self esteem and when i eat (and i mean eat anything) i feel horrible. i used to be overweight. it wasn't totally my fault or my upbringing. a lot of it had to do with my asthma and the medication i was on during puberty but anyways i was fat. i was a fat teenager and i was a nerd before it was cool and i was miserable. i was a light cutter and i was an eater and i hated myself. fast forward to now and i am an alcoholic bulimic. alcohol dulled my pain and bulimia is the only control i have over my environment and my body. not to scare you, but many people with EDs are at high risk of substance abuse. your daughter needs professional help ASAP. eating disorders are harder to overcome even than most substance abuse because you can't just quit eating. sometimes, i'm not even sure that it's an issue i really want to resolve. most of me wants to but there's a significant part of me that's fine with the situation. it's scary. it can kill. i've been at risk of a heart attack and i'm only 31. that mess is scary. your daughter is not going to be happy with you no matter what you do. i'm not sure how old your daughter is but most likely she is not going to quit on her own. she needs outside intervention.

DisplacedGRITS

well, i guess you can't cart her off to rehab but you may want to point her towards the ED forums here. hell, point her towards me. i'll tell her what a treat it is being 31 and a dysfunctional bulimic. excusing yourself after every meal while your whole family knows what's going on. the shame and humiliation yet you feel the compulsion pull at you and you feel powerless. if she can stop before it becomes ingrained, before she has no choice but to check herself into a rehab clinic, she'll live such a better life.

there's an HBO special called THIN. it's a documentary on bulimics and anorexics at a rehab facility. it's powerful, sad...it's a lot to take in. maybe watch it first and decide if it's something she could handle.

Lily71

Thank you all for the wonderful welcome.

I think I will try the Eating Disorder forum also. Thank you Displaced for your openness. My daughter is 21 almost 22. She was also into cutting when she was 13-14. She seen a therapist then. I know she's an adult and I don't think there is a whole lot I can do as far as rehab for her unless she wants to go. But I will definitely see if I can find the THIN DVD and start there.


Thank you Gardensparrow, I will research info about ANAD and Focus on the Family website to see what info is available there also.

Again, thank you all so much, I know this will be a long hard road, I've been through a horrible experience with her dad's alcoholism and death, but I will have to remember her life doesn't have to end the same way.

DisplacedGRITS

ah, i was under the impression she was a teen. the ED forum will be a great help. i hope she gets around to looking there. it's a difficult disease to deal with. i've started having problems over the past couple of years with my teeth due to it and it's so embarrassing. i hope she gets the help she needs. sorry if i came off strong. it's something i hate to see others struggle with. good luck to you and your daughter.