Psk691

I started using pain pills about 3 years ago while still in clege and lving in my frat house. I isolates myself from my friends and began to use drugs more and more. During the time I was getting ready to graduate I found my "dream job" and decided that I needed to stop and got a friend to set me up on a suboxone taper ... I was clean for almost 8 months.. Then long story short , fell off the wagon and been playing the game since. It's taken away everything. I am at Rock bottom. Back in February I went through the state and checked into what was supposed to be a detox and rehab program . When I got there the facility was disgusting. The amount staff patient ratio was insanely off balance. And no one there( even the staff) wanted to be there. I left after detox and wound up lasting only a few days. The past few months I've been sinking deeper and deeper. Becoming this dark and shceming person. I had a good friend confront me and tell me if I went to rehab I could move out there and start fresh, but only after treatment. So being that I'm uninsured the only option I have come accross is this state run facility again, where most are court ordered there as opposed to really wanting to change. I'm not saying I'm above anyone, please don't misunderstand. But I had another friend that had insurance and got
On a plane and went to florida 100% covered by insurance. I spoke with a few rehabs all over the country to see if there's anything I can do and they basically said with no insurance and little money, I need to rely on the state. This is the first year of my life that I'm jobless. And I refuse to believe that my only option is a facility that will 100% set me up to fail. I am pleading with anyone that has has expierence with this or know any organizations I should reach out to, that will help me get into a good rehab , even out of state( I live in PA) I am desperate to change. I know I'm not meant to live like this. I've spent thousands and scammed thousands as wasted so much. I'm on the verge of giving up. My friends and family are starting to lose faith. I'm starting to lose faith that this is even worth living for anymore. Anyway, that's my story. I pray that someone can help me. And I have to say some of the recovery stories are incredible. I hope one day I can share mine, if I make it.

Impurrfect

(((Psk))) - Welcome to SR!

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

DisplacedGRITS

In the meantime are you going to any meetings on your own? NA or AA? It's a good place to start and some people there may have advice specific to your area. Welcome to the site. I've been to a nice rehab place twice and while it was a positive experience, it didn't do diddly for my long term sobriety because rehab is short term. It only lasts a month usually, a few months at most. After that you're on your own and you have a choice. Build a support network and a solid plan, be it NA, AA or another program or go it your own. I tried going it my own after rehab and was drinking again almost immediately. Finding a long term program is what worked for me. Don't give up hope if rehab isn't in your immediate future. Many people have found sobriety without it. Here is a great starting place.

artsoul

Welcome Psk -

I went to both a privately owned rehab and a state one. Both were really well-run and I gained a lot from going. I'm sorry to hear you had a difference experience. Have you researched other treatment centers in the state? There are doctors who specialize in addiction you could call for recommendations - it might be worth asking around.

It's frustrating to want help and not be able to find it. I'm glad you reached out here today - it's a great place for support, no matter what other programs you get involved in. Think positive - there's a solution out there!:ghug3

Psk691

My state funding is not going to come at all because the fiscal year is ending and they are out of money , then they also said they will not cover inpatient for me since I left the state facility after detox in February. Does anyone have any organizations i may be able to reach out too ? I have been on the phone and Internet all week.. In my state and most others , the success rate of state funded rehabs is 5%. I was thinking of trying to buy short term health insurance but most companies won't cover because it's pre existing. Anyway .. Any help is much appreciated .. There has to be a decent rehab somewhere.. I know the help is there. Money can't be the only thing standing in my way.

Psk691

I haven't been attending meetings because I am still
Using to prevent being sick and feel liken hypocrite. I do have an arrangement conditional on me finishing rehab i can relocate to a more
Expensive but prosperous area of Northern NJ. I see that as a chance for a fresh start.

artsoul

Have you talked to a doctor or your local mental health services? They might be able to help you find some resources. I know that Salvation Army has a no-cost program. Also, here's a few places in Philly you might want to check out:

The Kirkbride Center

About.com: http://nphs.com/

tomsteve

my man, you are worth getting sober!!

one thing i highly suggest is getting to your family doctor and getting honest with him and gretting yer arse to some NA meetings. you got a lot of time on your hands right now and its a great time to work on you.

Sapling

You know why that is?...Because it's not what you do in rehab...It's what you do after that makes it work or not. My rehab prepared me for AA...I left early to save some money and went to AA on my own...A year later...Their success rate with me is 100%...And I was only there 2 weeks. If you really think you need rehab or detox...As mentioned...I'd check with the Salvation Army...In the meantime...I'd get to some NA meetings...Be with some recovered addicts...Make some clean friends and get busy working on recovery....You can change your life...I did. But it doesn't come without effort on your part...Like anything else in life worth having...You have to work for it.

Psk691

I just returned from Detox ... I begged them to let me stay ... But they said the state wouldn't fund me ... And I am not qualified for medical assistance ... I need inpatient help ... And now ... I was referred to a place in Cincinatti Ohio called Restoration Church ... But I dont know much about it .. And read one website that said you are forced to peddle the streets for donations in turn for staying there ... I don't know what to do at this point ... I keep looking in NY and NJ and PA and can't find anything that does not require funding up front ... Does anyone know anywhere else I should look ? I can definitely get money for a train or Plane ticket ... I'm desperate to get out of this area and into a legit rehab program to learn the things I need to learn for atleast 30 days ...

Dee74

Hi psk

Have you looked at the National Database?

you can zero into facilities by state and then location...and every entry has a brief description and most will give an idea of fees.

Substance Abuse Treatment Facility Locator

CraigA

It definetly is hard because of the economy and how staes and ins. sees addiction. I went through a halfway house where I had to find a job, go to meetings, and they provided counseling, group therapy, look in your area for recovery homes and call them. The bottom line take action go to AA meetings in your area and ask at the meetings also most likely someone in your area will know of some places. Keep the faith, and don't pick up the first one, get phone numbers of people in your arae and use them when you feel like using/drinking. Look in your phone book, call i believe 311 and they can also direct you. But the most important thing is stay connect to sober people, and keep posting and reading here, if you have a BB you canread that you can also read that online like you are reading this, I am not computer great but if you type Big Book Alcoholic Anonymous something should come up. Keep doing the positive work instead of drinking you can do this. God Bless you and stay strong