First post.... needing support
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 42
First post.... needing support
First post! I so badly want to stop this pattern of self-destruction I am caught in. Most days I want to drink and most days I do. I start thinking about it halfway through the day and wine is usually my poison. On nights that I drink, I usually have around 4 drinks. At least once a week, I binge drink to the point of blacking out. Its disgusting when I really think about it. I obviously end up with a terrible hangover the next day, but usually, on nights like that I am still intoxicated the next morning. I am tired of feeling like a POS!!! Not to mention the fact that my relationship is in jeapordy! I am a mean drunk and my boyfriend has essentially given me an ultimatum. I have somehow miraculously managed to hold a job, maintain a 4.0, and secure an awesome internship. However, I know that all of that is threatened as well if I continue to drink. The most difficult part about quitting for me is the fear that I won't be able to have fun or socialize like a "normal" person. I have so much difficulty with the craving for a drink that I get grouchy and irritable. Another sign that I have a problem. Anyhow, any advice for getting through the first 30 days? Do the cravings ease up? Does it get easier to be in social settings with alcohol?
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Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: North America
Posts: 1,628
Wecome to SR April :-)
Congrads on your grades and internship; you are obviously a bright young lady. Yes, eventually the cravings get better; the rate at which this happens differs from person to person.
I found it helpful to at first not think in terms of 30 days or even two weeks; my initial (hard) goal was 4 days (until my court date). Then I went day by day, until I was surprised to have two, then three, then four weeks, etc. It has gotten easier, but as you will read, it isn't always easy. Some times it boils down to taking things one minute, one hour, one day at a time. Gotta do what ya gotta do, ya know?
As you check the boards and hear from others, I'm sure suggestions and ideas better then mine will follow. For right now, I suggest, take it for today; start today, and keep coming back~~~~
Congrads on your grades and internship; you are obviously a bright young lady. Yes, eventually the cravings get better; the rate at which this happens differs from person to person.
I found it helpful to at first not think in terms of 30 days or even two weeks; my initial (hard) goal was 4 days (until my court date). Then I went day by day, until I was surprised to have two, then three, then four weeks, etc. It has gotten easier, but as you will read, it isn't always easy. Some times it boils down to taking things one minute, one hour, one day at a time. Gotta do what ya gotta do, ya know?
As you check the boards and hear from others, I'm sure suggestions and ideas better then mine will follow. For right now, I suggest, take it for today; start today, and keep coming back~~~~
instant
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Australia
Posts: 5,711
Cravings I think are the hall marks of the problem. We have a higher propensity to develop them than other people. If you stop they will eventually disapear or occur rarely.
I think there are also emotional and thinking changes that are the direct result of the addiction. Imagining a bleak future without the drug is one of them.
As it turns out there is more enjoyment and fun in my life now I am sober than was ever the case when I was drinking.
In retrospect it is now clear to me that there is a difference between joy and chemical excitement, or true fun and intoxication.
I think there are also emotional and thinking changes that are the direct result of the addiction. Imagining a bleak future without the drug is one of them.
As it turns out there is more enjoyment and fun in my life now I am sober than was ever the case when I was drinking.
In retrospect it is now clear to me that there is a difference between joy and chemical excitement, or true fun and intoxication.
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,678
Originally Posted by MsAprilJ 
The most difficult part about quitting for me is the fear that I won't be able to have fun or socialize like a "normal" person. I have so much difficulty with the craving for a drink that I get grouchy and irritable. Another sign that I have a problem. Anyhow, any advice for getting through the first 30 days? Do the cravings ease up? Does it get easier to be in social settings with alcohol?
Yes and yes...but that all comes much later...the first 30 days you might want to concentrate on detoxing safely and maintaining the irritability!. That's how it was for me anyway. Lots of chocolate helped with the cravings initially and reading up on AVRT helped me stick to not drinking and helped with the cravings immensely. It wouldn't hurt to keep away from social settings with alcohol for a bit too. Sticking close to SR is probably essential...
Well done on making the decision to quit now before things get too bad
x
So it goes
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Manchester UK
Posts: 1,620
I think as Scrambled says take each day at a time
If that is too much, do it hour by hour, just break it down to manageable chunks (heck break it down to 15 minutes or less if that works)
And also remember it isn't the 5th glass that gets you drunk, it is the first one.
Don't forget the first drink does the damage
Eventually it gets easier, and here's the thing you don't get told by a drunk, it is better sober. The sober people keep that a secret for themselves
Billy
If that is too much, do it hour by hour, just break it down to manageable chunks (heck break it down to 15 minutes or less if that works)
And also remember it isn't the 5th glass that gets you drunk, it is the first one.
Don't forget the first drink does the damage
Eventually it gets easier, and here's the thing you don't get told by a drunk, it is better sober. The sober people keep that a secret for themselves
Billy
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: Aussie
Posts: 382
Welcome to the boards. Im on day 10. It gets easier as the others have said you take it 1 day at a time. Don't think of months or years but think of Today and what you are going to do today instead of having a drink.
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 42
A sincere THANK YOU to all of you who took the time to read and respond to my post! I believe the support of others who have been through the same, is vital. I am going to be honest and say that I am struggling with so many emotions right now. First, I am so angry at my problem!!! Its so unfuckingfair! And, truthfully, I am probably pissed off at the thought of never getting to drink or "feel that buzz" again. Its like trying to get out of an unhealthy relationship.... actually, it IS trying to get out of an unhealthy relationship. It just happens to be with a substance and not a person. Second, I am feeling shame. I am ashamed that I do not possess the self control to "get my drinking in check" or to "moderate". Third, there is the "addict" in me that is in denial. Whispering in my ear that "I'm not really an alcoholic, I just go overboard sometimes, I can handle it this time, just a couple glasses of wine, etc. etc. etc...." And then its back to shame... Did I just say all of that "out loud"?
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Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Welcome MsAprilJ!
Every single thing you said is stuff we can all relate to and it's a really, really good thing that you're looking at it honestly right now, so Bravo!
I was terrified to get sober (sad and angry, too), but equally as scared to keep living the way I was. I realized I couldn't wait on my addiction to give me permission - I had to turn my obsession towards getting sober.
I never, ever, ever thought I'd say this, but I love being sober and have no desire to drink today..... It can happen for you, too! Glad you're here!
Every single thing you said is stuff we can all relate to and it's a really, really good thing that you're looking at it honestly right now, so Bravo!
I was terrified to get sober (sad and angry, too), but equally as scared to keep living the way I was. I realized I couldn't wait on my addiction to give me permission - I had to turn my obsession towards getting sober. I never, ever, ever thought I'd say this, but I love being sober and have no desire to drink today..... It can happen for you, too! Glad you're here!
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Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 513
Hi and welcome
I am on Day 7 myself. I have only gotten through this far by focus on each day, by itself. If I think about forever and ever right now I freak out. I just tell myself I am not going to obsess over the future, but I have committed that TODAY I am staying sober, and it has worked.
I am on Day 7 myself. I have only gotten through this far by focus on each day, by itself. If I think about forever and ever right now I freak out. I just tell myself I am not going to obsess over the future, but I have committed that TODAY I am staying sober, and it has worked.
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