Beer and when to stop
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 328
Hi Troll265, we seem to be in a similar situation in that we both realize we drink too much but aren't sure how serious the problem is or what to do about it exactly.
Even our drinking habits are similar, though there are some differences, you seem to be more of a social drinker while I drink both in social settings and by myself.
If you want to break a bad habit, 2 weeks of abstinence is too little in my opinion. Aim for a month at least, and two might be better.
That being said, and I know a lot of people will disagree with me there, I don't think drinking for one day (at the beer festival) should have too much influence if you don't drink a drop for two weeks before and after it. Just be careful not to drink too much that day, maybe settle on a limit ahead of time?
In any case, I can certainly understand your misgivings about not drinking at all in social situations, it's probably the main reason why I don't want to quit completely. Ever tried chatting up a girl while 100% sober (or worse, if she asks why you're drinking water)? Or being sober in a bar when all your friends are trashed?
That being said, there are a few practical pointers (from experience):
- If you're worried about your drinking, your close friends probably are as well... unless they're worse than you are. In any case, you can let them know you want to cut down or quit and there won't be much awkwardness (only for close friends though)
- If you're in a bar and you have a beer in front of you, no one will really care how fast you're drinking it, or even if you are drinking it. Even if someone does, just tell them you felt like hanging out but not really like drinking (say your stomach's upset or something)
- At parties, bring canned beer and walk around with an open can without drinking from it. Trust me that no one will notice.
If you can't be around an open beer without drinking it, even when you don't want to, you should think a bit more seriously about it.
All the best
Even our drinking habits are similar, though there are some differences, you seem to be more of a social drinker while I drink both in social settings and by myself.
If you want to break a bad habit, 2 weeks of abstinence is too little in my opinion. Aim for a month at least, and two might be better.
That being said, and I know a lot of people will disagree with me there, I don't think drinking for one day (at the beer festival) should have too much influence if you don't drink a drop for two weeks before and after it. Just be careful not to drink too much that day, maybe settle on a limit ahead of time?
In any case, I can certainly understand your misgivings about not drinking at all in social situations, it's probably the main reason why I don't want to quit completely. Ever tried chatting up a girl while 100% sober (or worse, if she asks why you're drinking water)? Or being sober in a bar when all your friends are trashed?
That being said, there are a few practical pointers (from experience):
- If you're worried about your drinking, your close friends probably are as well... unless they're worse than you are. In any case, you can let them know you want to cut down or quit and there won't be much awkwardness (only for close friends though)
- If you're in a bar and you have a beer in front of you, no one will really care how fast you're drinking it, or even if you are drinking it. Even if someone does, just tell them you felt like hanging out but not really like drinking (say your stomach's upset or something)
- At parties, bring canned beer and walk around with an open can without drinking from it. Trust me that no one will notice.
If you can't be around an open beer without drinking it, even when you don't want to, you should think a bit more seriously about it.
All the best
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,443
I know a lot of people will disagree with me there, I don't think drinking for one day (at the beer festival) should have too much influence if you don't drink a drop for two weeks before and after it.
The problem with this for me is once I get on a roll all my good intentions are worthless...
intending not to drink again after that 'one day' is a great aim...but if any of us could do that for sure none of us would be here.
I went out for 'one night' in 2004...didn't stop again til 2007.
There's a lot at stake for drinkers like me from one small decision like that.
D
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 1,138
Originally Posted by Dee74 
I went out for 'one night' in 2004...didn't stop again til 2007.
D
D
Crazy Cat Lady
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 2,661
I'm too afraid and respectful now of alcohol and the power it has over me. I'm over 2 months sober now and there's a persistant and not very quiet voice in my head that tells me that i have the power to moderate. Right now i think it's more fear of a relapse that's keeping me sober which is fine for the short term. I hope that as that fear dies down i can replace it with healthy life choices that keep me on the path of sobriety. Still, i'll take that fear for now! It's quite the motivator!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Vashon WA
Posts: 1,035
I quit seven months ago. I've quit for a month at a time before and it was torture--like holding my breath. A month isn't enough time to really feel the difference and adapt to sobriety in my opinion. The more time that I put in the less I want to drink, thank God!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Location: England
Posts: 10
Originally Posted by BASEjumper
Do you have a plan?
1. Stop drinking for 2 weeks as a trial (not long to go now)
2. No drinking during the week
3. No binging at weekends, just share a bottle of red with the girlfriend Saturday, for the next month, again, as a trial.
If I cant stick to my new plan then I will face the facts, let my friends and girlfriend know that I am clearly an alcoholic and ask for them to be supportive.
Not sure from there, I guess if I fail at the above then I'll be booking in to AA
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Location: England
Posts: 10
Originally Posted by Someguy23
Hi Troll265, we seem to be in a similar situation in that we both realize we drink too much but aren't sure how serious the problem is or what to do about it exactly.
Even our drinking habits are similar, though there are some differences, you seem to be more of a social drinker while I drink both in social settings and by myself.
If you want to break a bad habit, 2 weeks of abstinence is too little in my opinion. Aim for a month at least, and two might be better.
That being said, and I know a lot of people will disagree with me there, I don't think drinking for one day (at the beer festival) should have too much influence if you don't drink a drop for two weeks before and after it. Just be careful not to drink too much that day, maybe settle on a limit ahead of time?
In any case, I can certainly understand your misgivings about not drinking at all in social situations, it's probably the main reason why I don't want to quit completely. Ever tried chatting up a girl while 100% sober (or worse, if she asks why you're drinking water)? Or being sober in a bar when all your friends are trashed?
That being said, there are a few practical pointers (from experience):
- If you're worried about your drinking, your close friends probably are as well... unless they're worse than you are. In any case, you can let them know you want to cut down or quit and there won't be much awkwardness (only for close friends though)
- If you're in a bar and you have a beer in front of you, no one will really care how fast you're drinking it, or even if you are drinking it. Even if someone does, just tell them you felt like hanging out but not really like drinking (say your stomach's upset or something)
- At parties, bring canned beer and walk around with an open can without drinking from it. Trust me that no one will notice.
If you can't be around an open beer without drinking it, even when you don't want to, you should think a bit more seriously about it.
All the best
Even our drinking habits are similar, though there are some differences, you seem to be more of a social drinker while I drink both in social settings and by myself.
If you want to break a bad habit, 2 weeks of abstinence is too little in my opinion. Aim for a month at least, and two might be better.
That being said, and I know a lot of people will disagree with me there, I don't think drinking for one day (at the beer festival) should have too much influence if you don't drink a drop for two weeks before and after it. Just be careful not to drink too much that day, maybe settle on a limit ahead of time?
In any case, I can certainly understand your misgivings about not drinking at all in social situations, it's probably the main reason why I don't want to quit completely. Ever tried chatting up a girl while 100% sober (or worse, if she asks why you're drinking water)? Or being sober in a bar when all your friends are trashed?
That being said, there are a few practical pointers (from experience):
- If you're worried about your drinking, your close friends probably are as well... unless they're worse than you are. In any case, you can let them know you want to cut down or quit and there won't be much awkwardness (only for close friends though)
- If you're in a bar and you have a beer in front of you, no one will really care how fast you're drinking it, or even if you are drinking it. Even if someone does, just tell them you felt like hanging out but not really like drinking (say your stomach's upset or something)
- At parties, bring canned beer and walk around with an open can without drinking from it. Trust me that no one will notice.
If you can't be around an open beer without drinking it, even when you don't want to, you should think a bit more seriously about it.
All the best
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 328
Originally Posted by TROLL265
I have a plan yes.
1. Stop drinking for 2 weeks as a trial (not long to go now)
2. No drinking during the week
3. No binging at weekends, just share a bottle of red with the girlfriend Saturday, for the next month, again, as a trial.
If I cant stick to my new plan then I will face the facts, let my friends and girlfriend know that I am clearly an alcoholic and ask for them to be supportive.
Not sure from there, I guess if I fail at the above then I'll be booking in to AA
1. Stop drinking for 2 weeks as a trial (not long to go now)
2. No drinking during the week
3. No binging at weekends, just share a bottle of red with the girlfriend Saturday, for the next month, again, as a trial.
If I cant stick to my new plan then I will face the facts, let my friends and girlfriend know that I am clearly an alcoholic and ask for them to be supportive.
Not sure from there, I guess if I fail at the above then I'll be booking in to AA
What I mean by that is that, if you fail your 2 weeks trial or your one month trial, you go to AA... but what if you don't fail?
My question isn't academic. About 8 months ago, I did two 'dry' months to see if I could (not entirely dry to be honest, I was allowed one shot of vodka at parties to relax). My plan was almost word for word the same as yours, 'if I can't do it, I'll seek help and stop for good'.
Problem is, I could do it. It wasn't even that hard. I had mild cravings at the beginning of the second week and a few times after a hard day I though to myself 'Man, a beer would hit the spot'... but I had no slip-ups, no physical withdrawal symptoms and the one shot at parties never became ten.
So after the two months, I had no plan at all... so I started drinking heavily again. Not as bad as before, but certainly not in a responsible or healthy way. It's not until three months ago that I decided to do something about it.
So... maybe learn from my mistake. Good luck to you in any case.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Location: England
Posts: 10
Originally Posted by Someguy23
I was allowed one shot of vodka at parties to relax
Its almost like, whats the point in having one :p Sounds like you stayed strong though.
One thing I will say though in my defense is that I know when to stop in terms of being pissed. If I think I've had enough at 7 pints then I will stop drinking and drink coke for the rest of the night, I wont continue to drink in to the early hours like some of my friends do.
I am the first to get a taxi home at around midnight if we go out, whereas most my age would continue partying till the bars/clubs close.
Ok thats all I'm going to say on this thread now, will let you all know how I get on
Cheers all
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Vashon WA
Posts: 1,035
The biggest advantage of quitting "for good" is that the more that time passes the less you think about drinking. For the first two months or so I thought about it all the time--until it just drove me crazy. Then it started to get better and now I'm much easier with it.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Staffordshire UK
Posts: 514
Originally Posted by dgillz
I will tell you one true story about an old drinking buddy of mine. He drank about the same amount I did, was 5 years younger, and in a hell of a lot better shape. He ran 10K races all the time. He woke up one morning all jaundiced, went to see his Dr., went from there straight to the hospital. 17 days later he died of kidney and liver failure. He never went home. No advance notice at all. He had just run the Azalea City 10K (Mobile AL) 2 days prior to going to the hospital.
Food for thought.
How old was this guy when he died?
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