I am starting over again
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Bridgeton
Posts: 718
when does one turn the corner?
What a year it has been. I did almost 100 days in rehab as I drank for too long (I also hoped it would take away some jail time for a 3rd DUI)....
I did the jail time...and came out feeling positive..."if God took me to it, he got me thru it!"...I still go to 4 or 5 AA meetings a week. I worked the steps with a seasoned sponsor who is an inspiration to me.
Now as I close in on 1 year sober, I all of the sudden where I am in life.
I am struggling, not with the thought of a drink, but with life. Things seem to be caving in around me.
I worry a lot about my 'grown children'....my parents whose health is getting worse & worse, my home which I may lose....I lost my license for 10 years!
I do have a job, but it is not covering my costs of living....I find it so hard to be positive.
I pray numerous times a day. I always try & do the next right thing. I know to grow, there is often pain...but it seems to be piling up on me with no end in sight. I try to let go & let God....I just seem to struggle with my new found sobriety...it was so much better years ago....I can't figure it out....
I did the jail time...and came out feeling positive..."if God took me to it, he got me thru it!"...I still go to 4 or 5 AA meetings a week. I worked the steps with a seasoned sponsor who is an inspiration to me.
Now as I close in on 1 year sober, I all of the sudden where I am in life.
I am struggling, not with the thought of a drink, but with life. Things seem to be caving in around me.
I worry a lot about my 'grown children'....my parents whose health is getting worse & worse, my home which I may lose....I lost my license for 10 years!
I do have a job, but it is not covering my costs of living....I find it so hard to be positive.
I pray numerous times a day. I always try & do the next right thing. I know to grow, there is often pain...but it seems to be piling up on me with no end in sight. I try to let go & let God....I just seem to struggle with my new found sobriety...it was so much better years ago....I can't figure it out....
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
I had to look at things differently...I knew I couldn't stop on my own...What better place to find out how to stop...Then a room full of people...With the same problem I have...That want the same thing I want.....I learned to like it....Now I love it...It saved my fricken life...
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
Welcome back, and congrats on 3 days!! The last "2nd chance" I was given was after ignoring LOTS of chances. I had to want recovery for myself, STOP being the one that did everything for everyone, took on their issues, and work on me.
This recovery stuff hasn't been easy, but it's worth it. I don't think I have another recovery in me, so holding on to this one for dear life.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
This recovery stuff hasn't been easy, but it's worth it. I don't think I have another recovery in me, so holding on to this one for dear life.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Sober Alcoholic
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 3,539
If you feel like God has given you another chance, then the question to ask yourself is what God wants you to do.
For some people, all that is needed is a firm resolve not to drink. They can quit all by themselves or with some self-help literature. As far as I’m concerned more power to um.
Personally, I have an incredibly strong will but things got VERY bad for me. My will was a part of the problem. I did not feel like God was giving me another chance. I had no God. Finally I came to the point where I wanted expert help! Fearing rehab more than AA I chose the latter. There I found a whole lot of folks who accepted my miserable desperate self just as I was. They had suggestions but they were not pushy. They did not say I HAD to do anything, and I liked that. I did not like some of their suggestions but I was willing to listen. Some had dealt with the same sorts of problems I was facing. Some were available to spend lots of face to face time helping me with those difficulties. I say this because I worked for me. Hope you find something that works for you.
For some people, all that is needed is a firm resolve not to drink. They can quit all by themselves or with some self-help literature. As far as I’m concerned more power to um.
Personally, I have an incredibly strong will but things got VERY bad for me. My will was a part of the problem. I did not feel like God was giving me another chance. I had no God. Finally I came to the point where I wanted expert help! Fearing rehab more than AA I chose the latter. There I found a whole lot of folks who accepted my miserable desperate self just as I was. They had suggestions but they were not pushy. They did not say I HAD to do anything, and I liked that. I did not like some of their suggestions but I was willing to listen. Some had dealt with the same sorts of problems I was facing. Some were available to spend lots of face to face time helping me with those difficulties. I say this because I worked for me. Hope you find something that works for you.
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