JJB

Hi everyone

I used to come on this site a lot and stopped. Guess what happened? of course my drinking got worse.

So instead of waking up with a hangover as usual and deciding not to drink anymore (or at least for just today) today I'm reaching out to SR again.

I know I can't do this on my own, I've tried it and it never works so I'm hoping that with your help, going to meetings' help and God's help I can at least not pick up a drink today.

I'm fed up of this monkey on my back and I want control of my life back.

neferkamichael

I couldn't do it by myself either. Thanks to SR I'm almost 6 months of crack. Plenty of people here who care and enjoy helping others with problems.

Sapling

Welcome back JJB...Yeah...I had to throw in the towel myself...Just couldn't do it anymore. I used the program of Alcoholics Anonymous to quit drinking....The great thing about it is......It not only helps with the drink problem....It teaches you how to live life the way life should be lived....I got so much more out of it than I ever dreamed of...It's pretty amazing. I can tell you from that sentence above...You have done steps one, two and three. I've seen people struggle with those steps for months....Usually end up leaving...The one's Ive seen...Right back to drinking.
This is how I did it...I went to a meeting and I listened....Met some great people...Came back the next day and did the same thing....I saw someone that said some things that interested me...He looked like he "got it." I went up to him after the meeting and said I needed a sponsor....We went for coffee...He told me his story...Which made me feel like a rookie...I talked about mine....Told him pretty much what you said above here and I was on my way with step 4. He is my sponsor and friend today and he took me through the 12 steps...And that not only saved my life...It changed it. And that's what I needed. See if you can hit a meeting today...Start your journey..Don't drink for today...And change your life.

BLove06

Reading all these posts really makes you realize that you are not the only one with this terrible disease. Sometimes you feel so alone and as if there's no one that could ever understand. There's a lot of us out there. Trying to quit, relapsing, trying again........and when you read some of these success stories, it makes you realize that it CAN be done. I've dried out many times, and was sober for about 2 years while pregnant and nursing, I know I can live without the alcohol. I'm currently detoxing right now for what I hope and pray is the last time. My body is telling me I HAVE to stop. I am a 31 year old woman with a beautiful child and wonderful husband. I have so much to live for, and I have to get rid of the one thing holding me back and making me miserable. For me it's learning to deal with the hard parts of life without reaching for a drink. Learning to handle my anxiety without always medicating myself to feel more comfortable. Also, a huge thing is admitting that once you quit, it has to be for good. It's hard to admit that you will never be able to have a drink again. Alcoholics can't just have one glass of wine, or one beer. We don't stop at one, and the cycle starts all over again. I think of all the people in the world going through this process, and I hope and pray success for everyone.

Sapling

Sounds like you are figuring it out...The quitting forever thing got me at first too...So I just quit for today...Easier for me to wrap myself around that....My first AA meeting gave me hope....I had nothing to lose....I'd already lost it all. Try something...And run with it.....Because I can tell you from experience...It doesn't get better drinking.

langkah

Good you're trying. I hope that reading and posting helps you this time more than the reading and posting you did before.

I see you're considering adding in doing some meetings...when will you begin?

Dee74

Welcome back JJB
welcome to you too BLove

D

JJB

Thanks everyone for your helpful words and pushing. Nice to feel welcomed back and supported even though i've been away so long.
Dee you're still here . You're a star! xxx

I'm still at the stage of counting hours at the moment but hope to then be able to clock them into days.

Sapling

Use some of that counting time to get to some meetings and getting a sponsor...Good luck to you.

lilac0721

Glad you are here, JJB! From a person who has had many attempts at getting and staying sober, I encourage you to keep trying, keep trying different things and to spend a lot of time here. SOOOO much support!

Rexfiles

Yup, by quitting just for today, living in the now, with sober support, a week has passed since my last drink.

Every problem I had before I still have, except I am now dealing with them with a clearing conscious, and not trying to compound them by adding more.

By some of my past actions, and inactions, over the past couple years I spent out this time, I anticipate a very.....ahhh, let's just say, "colorful" year.

"today" is here, and some challenges to face. I'm awake, not feeling like a drowned rat, and am determined to not pick up, and give it the best I can.

Just a side note, watched the movie "seabiscut". For the first time last night. all the main players in the film were broken in some way or another.

By reaching out, and being compassionate to each other, and having faith, they did the impossible.

Not alone, but together. I took that and can easily extrapolate that to our experiences in life, in recovery.

To paraphrase a quote from the movie, "just because someone is a little banged up, it's no reason to throw an entire life away".

Yup, I'm beat and banged up myself, but there is still plenty to live for, and the journey ahead is what will make it worth LIVING the rest of it, not just existing at a bar stool.

Peace

Rex

JJB

Am now just finishing day two and keeping my mind very concentrated on not doing things the same way as I did last time.
Wow two days!! Only you guys will understand what an achievement that is and that's why i'm so glad to be here.

sober4metoday

Congratulations on 2 days!!

Sapling

What have you done that's different?

JJB

Sapling , I've just posted a list of tips to get sober which I found online and I've found quite a few of them useful.
One of them is to ignore the high rates of relapse and concentrate on your own success.
Another is the refusal to feel self pity.
Another is to join a forum (OK I did that last time but the difference is this time I will not run away as soon as anyone asks a direct question like yours!)

I sometimes found posts on here a little too aggressive (which put me off) but now i understand why people can be like that. It's a nasty disease we're up against and it needs some hard fighting .

JJB

Sapling , I've just posted a list of tips to get sober which I found online and I've found quite a few of them useful.
One of them is to ignore the high rates of relapse and concentrate on your own success.
Another is the refusal to feel self pity.
Another is to join a forum (OK I did that last time but the difference is this time I will not run away as soon as anyone asks a direct question like yours!)

I sometimes found posts on here a little too aggressive (which put me off) but now i understand why people can be like that. It's a nasty disease we're up against and it needs some hard fighting .

jocata

Glad you are back JJB. Sometimes the posts on here do sound harsh, but it is usually just honest experience. Glad you are going to do some things different this time. I could never do it alone. I failed everytime.

God bless.

Sapling

It's not a game...It kicked my ass pretty bad...Yeah I saw your list...I liked the ones about the meetings.

jrmar

Yes, it’s a killer for sure. congratulations on your second day sober. Reading your post reminded me of me, years ago I wrote almost the same thing on SR.since then it almost killed me. And this time around I have over a year sober thanks to God, Meetings and good people that share their struggles and their hope. Thanks for sharing..

Sapling

Congrats on a year jrmar..Little late...But still Congrats...Nice post.