Aysha

I am still waiting to go home. The sick thing is as soon as I got out the hospital I went to running around again for 2 days. Staples and drainage tubes sticking out of me. Goodness I am really freakin sick. I need some serious help.
But it has caught up with me and I had to go back to the hospital the other night because I was doubled over in pain. '
It has just now really hit me that someone tried to kill me. I keep seeing in my mind the blood pouring out of my head from the corner of my eye. Sorry to be so graphic but thats what is keeping it real for me right now. I got my purse from the police station and it was covered in blood.
I am staying with a friend and I dont feel comfortsable here at all. I know i am a huge burden and she just is too nice to say so. But I have no where else to go.
Anyway, I will be going home the first flight Monday. Whether going home or not is the right thing to do. It is the safe thing to do IMO right now.
I am scared to go anywhere now. That really messed my head up. It did something to me that I am not too sure of yet. But I am different somehow. I am not the only one who sees it.
Anyway, I cant wait to get back home safe and sound and with people who love me.

Dee74

I'm praying that you can stay safe and out of harm over the weekend Trish.

D

Zencat

Being safe is a huge act of recovery. Please do take great care before you go home.

Here's a link to some important information that I believe is relevant for you:
Post-traumatic stress disorder

aussieblue

You are in my thoughts . I really hope you can find a way to get of the drugs and be safe .

Liberty47

Hope your willing to go to any lengths, if not I would honestly be shocked if you live another year.

SSIL75

I'm afraid you're not going to make it either, Trish. Your mind doesn't seem to be on your side. It's like you hit bottom and grabbed a shovel. What's one more day, right? I remember that kind of thinking well.

Is IP rehab an option? Do you want to live?

SSIL75

I wanted to add that one of the reasons I think IP might be important for you would be the element of surrender. "I Do Not Know what is in my best interest. I Do Not Have my best interests at Heart. I Don't Know what I am doing, what I am thinking, what is going to keep me alive". I think you need someone else in control.

Oh man I really wish you peace. I know you can do it!!

laurie6781

Of course you are afraid right now and will probably have to incorporate some SERIOUS counseling into whatever you decide to do about yur addiction.

(((((Trish))))) please remember that although you are going home where you feel "safe and sound and with people who love me." That you are also going home where people 'enable' you.

Please, since you a 'lying low' at your friends place until Monday, start your "ToDo List" of the first things you need to do for you for your addiction upon your arrival.

I hope and pray that this was the time 'you get it.'

Love and hugs,

Horselover

Are you home?

Dee74

I was wondering/hoping that too Trish.
I hope you can get to a PC soon and let us know

D

aussieblue

I am wondering too, I hope your o.k.

Horselover

Bump!

Hevyn

Thinking of you, Trish. Let us know something, please.

recoverywfaith

Trish,

Please know you are in my prayers. Be safe and let us know when you can how you are doing.

Horselover

There are prayers being said for you tonight from NM my friend.

grateful2b

(((((Trish)))))
The one time in a long while that I have popped in here, I find your post and update
I am deeply saddened, ...I know you know what you need to do and I pray that you have the will to try and love yourself enough, one more time...
my prayers are with you, girl...you ARE worth it.
I pray you have had enough