First day sober and it's a Friday night.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 4
First day sober and it's a Friday night.
I am a 38 year old functional alcoholic. I've been drinking heavily for the last 21 years or so. I've always been able to cool off and moderate for periods of time. I've always been a happy drunk, but that started changing when I uncovered my wife's long term affair almost 10 months ago.
My wife and I are reconciling, but my drinking has spiraled out of control. It has really started affecting my mood. My therapist seems to think I have some sort of mood/depression issue and has been trying to persuade me to at the very least cut back on the booze and go see a Psychiatrist for diagnosis and meds.
I have actually cut down on the quantity I consume, but I still end up getting drunk almost every night. Moderation just isn't working for me.
Last night is the reason I have decided to finally try to kick my addiction to alcohol. I found out the "other guy" helped pick out a guitar that my wife had purchased for me several years ago. Last night, Pete Townsend would have been proud, and I can honestly say I don't feel bad about destroying that guitar. What I DO feel bad about the loss of control over my emotions and all the nasty things it caused me to say to my wife, who has been remorseful and is now doing everything as right as possible.
So... I poured my scotch down the sink, and here I am on a Friday night!
My wife and I are reconciling, but my drinking has spiraled out of control. It has really started affecting my mood. My therapist seems to think I have some sort of mood/depression issue and has been trying to persuade me to at the very least cut back on the booze and go see a Psychiatrist for diagnosis and meds.
I have actually cut down on the quantity I consume, but I still end up getting drunk almost every night. Moderation just isn't working for me.
Last night is the reason I have decided to finally try to kick my addiction to alcohol. I found out the "other guy" helped pick out a guitar that my wife had purchased for me several years ago. Last night, Pete Townsend would have been proud, and I can honestly say I don't feel bad about destroying that guitar. What I DO feel bad about the loss of control over my emotions and all the nasty things it caused me to say to my wife, who has been remorseful and is now doing everything as right as possible.
So... I poured my scotch down the sink, and here I am on a Friday night!
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Location: Upstate New York
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FinallySeeing - Very pleased to meet you. I know you'll really benefit from being here. You can share your feelings with people who really get it - you don't have to be alone with your anger & frustration.
I can't believe all the years I thought I was helping myself by getting numb. What I needed to do was be clearheaded to face and deal with the challenges in my life. Instead, I was foggy and incoherent much of the time. I'm still paying for the insane lifestyle I once led. You already know you don't want to go down the same road as many of us did. Be proud of yourself for recognizing what needs to be done. You can do this, and we are with you!
I can't believe all the years I thought I was helping myself by getting numb. What I needed to do was be clearheaded to face and deal with the challenges in my life. Instead, I was foggy and incoherent much of the time. I'm still paying for the insane lifestyle I once led. You already know you don't want to go down the same road as many of us did. Be proud of yourself for recognizing what needs to be done. You can do this, and we are with you!
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 3
Great job man. Keep it up! And hey, you're better than I for reconciling a cheated relationship. I don't do well in that situation. It's one of the few unforgivable to me. You're open minded, smart, and you're on the right road my man. Keep moving! And dont turn back. 
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 4
Thanks for the responses. I think I may have landed in the right place!
Dee74 - I like your analogy of pouring gas on a fire. Seems to ring really true in my case.
Boater - great job! I'm afraid my 24 mark won't be until about 4:00am, but I am looking forward to it!
Dee74 - I like your analogy of pouring gas on a fire. Seems to ring really true in my case.
Boater - great job! I'm afraid my 24 mark won't be until about 4:00am, but I am looking forward to it!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Ontario
Posts: 79
I went through something very similar about 12 years ago. The marriage did end but the drinking continued up until a week ago when I finally said enough of it. Congrats on dumping the scotch and I wish you the best!
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