Threshold

I don't know you, but when your drinking buddies start telling you that they think you have a drinking problem...I'd take that as a head's up

freshstart57

I didn't feel my head clearing for four or five days sober. That would be the minimum, I think, to see if you are experiencing any cognitive issues. On the other hand, in the interests of SCIENCE, it is recommended that you abstain for a month, starting right now. An inability to do this is cause for concern.

Lionne

Offtopic:
Dee, I'm really sorry that I confused you with Carol.(Carol and Dee, you both are great. I don't want either of you to feel like I don't see you as individual persons. My apologies for the mixup ) I feel a bit embarassed now. It was early in the morning over here,and before I went off to the library I checked in on the forum and wrote my post. Maybe I wasn't totally awake yet or I maybe I read a post by Carol in another thread just before reading this one. :P

Ontopic: Glad you came back to the thread avgcollegkid. Using alcohol as a way to cope with stress or other problems is another sign that your relationship with alcohol is not average and it shows that you are already depending on it as a crutch. Even if it might be that you don't have any physical dependency (yet) to it, you are already on a very dangerous path if you cannot get through stressful times without it. Keep reading around and if you like, you can also write how your plan to not drink this week goes and what's happening. Take care,
Lionne

Boleo

Ummm... Lets see. Where is there alcoholic behavior in this post?

eJoshua

Glad you stopped back avgcollegekid. I hope that you will realize that drinking is not relieving any stress for you. When I was drinking I was a nervous, stressed out mess. Drinking felt like it was helping because I felt like I was able to relax, but in reality it caused more stress and didn't really help me in the long run. On top of that, sleep when you are drinking is a total mess, so I wouldn't be surprised if your body is starved for some quality sleep if you are drinking a lot.

Best wishes to you and best of luck in your studies.

avgcollegekid

Thanks for your advice everyone. I guess I sort of knew that my rekationship with alcohol wasn't normsl. Tonight I told myself I wasn't going to drink but 6 friend showed up with half a handle and I couldn't not. I have anearly class tomorrow and I feel like an idiot becausr now I have to go hungover unless I start drinking in the morning, which I don't want to do.

Lionne

Hey avgcollegekid,

I can guarantee you 100% that alcohol will not help you deal better with the stress, and it causes anxiety, is a depressant and disrupts your sleep patterns to. Really, please don't start that "hair of the dog" method...it would just open the door to drinking 24/7.
Good that you are so honest about it. You are not a fool, but I think that you found this forum because deep down you knew that your drinking has become problematic. (after all you wrote I'm pretty sure) Not being able to stop once you started ingesting alcohol, and having no control over it is part of alcoholic drinking. I'm sorry to say that, but cutting down or trying to manage your intake will most probably not work out. I think many of the people here in the forum (including me) had to go through a phase where they tried to cut down they realized that it didn't work. It's not a matter of "pulling yourself together" or willpower. Plus, life on campus is an environment where booze is everywhere and it takes some time until other people realize that there's likely something wrong with your drinking. It kinda takes a lot to stand out from the crowd of boozing students. I think that's why your friends are probably right.

If you find that it doesn't work out for you either, it's very serious but still it doesn't have to be the end of the world if you decide to do something about it. Most likely you 'll need support irl; a good next step would be to find out if there is an alcohol counsellor that you could make an appointment with either on campus (some colleges do have one) or in the town your college is in.
There's really no shame in it. PS: I didn't have that at my uni but I saw a professional at the mental health services of my university for almost a year after I quit drinking. It sure helped me a lot to stay sober and also to develop healthy coping skills for stressful times. It was totally confidential and it was free, maybe you can look if there is some kind of support available for you on campus.

I know, being "found out" and the fear of negative consequences can be a hurdle, or being afraid of being labeled, but most of the time but a) none of the things you are fearing happen, b)most likely some people know already c)it's really not as important as your own health and wellbeing. This won't go away once you graduate. It is progressive.
I hope you managed not to drink an eye opener, best wishes,
Lionne

onlythetruth

avgcollegekid:

Perhaps things would be clearer and easier for you if you reframed the question from "am I an alcoholic?" to "do I have a healthy relationship with alcohol?"

I'm not sure anyone here can or should venture an answer as to the "alcoholic" question, since some of us can't even agree an on what an "alcoholic" IS.

But I'll go out on a limb and tell you that from where I sit you definitely have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. It may be common to drink a lot in college, even to drink daily. But it is not common, nor is it normal, nor is it healthy, to go to classes drunk, to drink alone in the middle of the day when others are in class, or to become upset when you aren't able to drink in this manner. Taken together, this behavior leaves absolutely no doubt that you have an unhealthy drinking pattern: a problem with alcohol.

The question is not whether you do or don't have a problem. The question is what you are going to do about it. Any ideas?

Danae

So glad you posted here and are willing to listen to what people have to say about their own experiences.

For me it has been much easier to not drink at all than to cut back. I tried for a while to limit myself, but that felt like deprivation and I was always thinking about when i could drink next and how much.

After the initial rough days/weeks, this has been sooooooo much better!

bellakeller

Welcome to the board. This is a good place.

I am glad that some of your friends care enough about you to let you know what they think about your drinking.

Take care.

Reset

Welcome. I was a college kid who drank every day, got pretty good grades at a difficult school, and for the most part was doing what most other college kids do. Except that I had a big drinking problem at 27 and was downing a beer or two, half a fifth of bourbon and three glasses of wine a night by the time I turned 42. Be careful.

And after I quit, I discovered it's not a stress reliever at all. It's a stress delayer. The things that made me stressed after I got drunk to create "relief" were still there when I woke up in the middle of the night or the next day.

I couldn't imagine not drinking either. Then I quit with a short term goal of 3 months and realized I wasn't missing anything. Maybe you could try it and see what happens. It's only 3 months and it'll give you a clearer perspective of the effects.

Anyway good luck and again, welcome.

Mariano

You sound like an alcoholic. Sorry, it is my honest opinion.

FNW

I wish someone had said all of that to me when I was in college! I was >40 when I got sober. I too got through with honors, but a mess in my head. It will feel much better without the booze- give it a try.