sugarbear1

AA online chatroom - available 24 hours also has designated times for online meetings
Alcoholics Anonymous - online....the book (big book)
AA speakers - online
Fourth Dimension Group, Bob S. audio of big book study
SMART program online
SOS online program

Best wishes!

sugarbear1

Quitting is easy, staying stopped, that's difficult!

starlite dawn

Thank you for this post cleareyes.........this is how I feel about me

DayTrader

You CAN be rid of it......but it's probably going to take some different direction than what you've been trying.

"To get something you never had you'll have to do something you've never done." not sure who said that but it's a favorite of mine.

the AA program has changed my life......all for the better.....and it's not at all what I figured it would be. I was full of contempt prior to actually investigating it for myself. Maybe the same will be true for you.

One thing I've seen more often than most things.....when it comes to alcoholism.....we alkies seem to be able to take a LOT of pain.....and we'll continue to take it far longer than necessary rather than admit that a new course of action is in order. We seem to be inclined to leave our hands on that hot stove and just take the burns rather than consider admitting we were wrong to put our hand there in the first place.

Learning about alcoholism doesn't seem to be of much help to many alcoholics either. All that knowledge....and plenty of support too......can seem to be completely non-existent when that insatiable desire for the next first drink hits. That really spooked me about my drinking.... I mean, I KNEW I was headed for trouble but, at the moment of truth, it was like I didn't remember ANY of it. There's where AA hooked me....they swore that their solution didn't require me to be able to tough it out and find a way within myself to "just not drink, no matter what." Good news to me.....cuz I couldn't seem to ever pull that one off.

and for what it's worth.....there was NOBODY I hated more on this earth than ME. Before getting into recovery and well into my early days, the level of sheer disgust, mistrust, and pure hatred I had for myself was reeeeally intense. All I can say is that, once I really started taking my recovery seriously, started doing the work in AA that I didn't want to do and didn't think would solve any problems, and really started letting go of a lot of my preconceptions about "how things really are" in life.... I finally started to heal. As a matter of fact, it's been over 4 years since I wished I was dead... That may seem melodramatic but, where I was coming from, it's quite the leap forward.

lushly

Good luck cleareyes. I so know where you are at. But for me it got much worse, because it never gets better. I completely had nothing left to give my addicition it took it all. I then quit. With lots of support ,accountability and working a program. Only took me 30 years to get stopped. Hu? Be willing to do whatever it takes, is what is takes. One of the saddest things it takes is self worth. I allowed a liquid drug to obliterate me, because I always had to do things my way. What an oxymoron! I wish you the best and of course you're in my prays because I cannot forget the alcoholic that still suffers.

Terminally Unique

Isn't that the truth !