An interduction
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 3
An interduction
Ok, here I am. I came here on my own feel will because I recognize I have a problem and this looks like a place I can find some people that are facing the same sort of problems and hopefully I will get some support.
I am a fairly heavy drinker.... maybe 100 drinks a week. Not sure what everyone here considers "heavy". I spend alot of time in bars, and 100 a week does not seem overly excessive compared to alot of my "drniking friends". But, I realize, from a health standpoint and a desire to getting my life back on track...my drinking needs to be cut way back.
I drink mainly to forget my problems. I dont deal with them in a healthy way and use alchohol as medication... the same way some might use AD's. I have had alot of **** in my life, especially recently....and drinking always seemed like the easiest way out.
Anyhow, I'm posting here. Hopefully this is the first step in changing my life. Wish me luck.
I am a fairly heavy drinker.... maybe 100 drinks a week. Not sure what everyone here considers "heavy". I spend alot of time in bars, and 100 a week does not seem overly excessive compared to alot of my "drniking friends". But, I realize, from a health standpoint and a desire to getting my life back on track...my drinking needs to be cut way back.
I drink mainly to forget my problems. I dont deal with them in a healthy way and use alchohol as medication... the same way some might use AD's. I have had alot of **** in my life, especially recently....and drinking always seemed like the easiest way out.
Anyhow, I'm posting here. Hopefully this is the first step in changing my life. Wish me luck.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 3
Thanks for the warm wishes. Can anyone tell me if theres such a thing as just cutting back..... Don't see I have it in me to go cold turkey....would just be setting myself up for failure if I were to try that. Never veiwed myself as an alcoholic... but I am definately dependant.... please your experience.....
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
welcome turningthepage 
I think most people try to cut back...and most people seem to fail.
It's hard to do - the whole issue of alcoholism is we have no control - so how can we do something we've shown we can't do very well in order to cut back, or taper?
It's especially hard to do if you're using alcohol to self medicate.
You're drinking a significant amount - many of us have detox horror stories - I think it's safest for you to see a Dr and get some medical advice and supervision with your detox.
D
I think most people try to cut back...and most people seem to fail.
It's hard to do - the whole issue of alcoholism is we have no control - so how can we do something we've shown we can't do very well in order to cut back, or taper?
It's especially hard to do if you're using alcohol to self medicate.
You're drinking a significant amount - many of us have detox horror stories - I think it's safest for you to see a Dr and get some medical advice and supervision with your detox.
D
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: I'm exactly where I should be.
Posts: 1,889
There is such a thing as cutting back but most alcoholics have a problem with that plan. It's a great plan when it works -but never worked for me.
If you are used to hanging out in a bar drinking 100 drinks a week, you may be conscious of your drinking and cut back (some) but eventually, if you don't change your playground I think you will find that you will resume old habits within time.
There are many ways to moderate...just drink on weekends, just drink 2 a night, save certain nights for drinking, dilute drinks...I found that by moderating my binges were making up for lost alcohol.
Some people can moderate. There's only one way to find out.
If you are used to hanging out in a bar drinking 100 drinks a week, you may be conscious of your drinking and cut back (some) but eventually, if you don't change your playground I think you will find that you will resume old habits within time.
There are many ways to moderate...just drink on weekends, just drink 2 a night, save certain nights for drinking, dilute drinks...I found that by moderating my binges were making up for lost alcohol.
Some people can moderate. There's only one way to find out.
Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Northern Virginia
Posts: 449
Well good luck and congrats if you can just cut back. I had no success at that, my experience would reveal only that I failed.
The book that I use mentions that heavy drinkers can usually stop or moderate if given sufficient reason. You might be a heavy drinker who can do that.
I couldn't begin to tell you how to succeed, but here's some things I tried.
0. No Jack Daniels or Jim Beam, whiskey made me violent, I cut that out early as the drink of choice. - Failure. Of course whenever I was drinking and it was offered me or the only thing around, I drank it.
1. Drinking only beer. Figuring I wouldn't drink as much because I'd feel full in the stomach. - Failure.
2. Drinking only when the wife and I went out and holding myself accountable as to how much I drank, letting her limit it. - Failure. I went to the bathroom a lot by way of the bar, sneaked drinks, and drank before we went out.
3. Drinking only on Friday Nights. Failure. I usually found some excuse to drink on Saturday and Sunday and hey - Wed is close enough to Friday right ?
4. Buying less at the store. If it isn't at the house, then I can't drink it. Faliure. Always ended up driving, drunk, going for more.
5. Switching to Vodka. Getting fat and people on the "Atkins Diet" said Vodka was okay. Failure. When the Vodka ran out I went back for more vodka or if the store was closed, went to the bar and drank beers.
Those are a few of things I tried, and I failed at. I failed at them because my body reacts to alcohol differently than it does in say my wife or my brothers. Couple that with a mind that's obsessed with the notion of being able to enjoy alcohol, and a nature that's restless, irritable, discontent, resentful, selfish, self-centered, fearful, etc.. etc....
I came to the conclusion I must be what that book described as an alcoholic. Which means I've abandoned any and all hope that I can drink alcohol safely, responsibly, and without adverse consequences to my health (spiritual, mental and physical), my life and the lives of the people that love me, my community, etc.. etc..
I did find that there's a wonderful life on the other side, that life abstaining from alcohol can be rich, fullfilling, joyful, sorrowful, and the full range of human experiences available to me - experiences I was denying myself sitting and drinking - being scared, being resentful, being lazy, and being - drunk.
All that being said, if I could make the right about face and drink like a gentlemen, I wouldn't be posting this message - I'd be out drinking like a gentlemen.
If you can do it. Rock on and enjoy it.
The book that I use mentions that heavy drinkers can usually stop or moderate if given sufficient reason. You might be a heavy drinker who can do that.
I couldn't begin to tell you how to succeed, but here's some things I tried.
0. No Jack Daniels or Jim Beam, whiskey made me violent, I cut that out early as the drink of choice. - Failure. Of course whenever I was drinking and it was offered me or the only thing around, I drank it.
1. Drinking only beer. Figuring I wouldn't drink as much because I'd feel full in the stomach. - Failure.
2. Drinking only when the wife and I went out and holding myself accountable as to how much I drank, letting her limit it. - Failure. I went to the bathroom a lot by way of the bar, sneaked drinks, and drank before we went out.
3. Drinking only on Friday Nights. Failure. I usually found some excuse to drink on Saturday and Sunday and hey - Wed is close enough to Friday right ?
4. Buying less at the store. If it isn't at the house, then I can't drink it. Faliure. Always ended up driving, drunk, going for more.
5. Switching to Vodka. Getting fat and people on the "Atkins Diet" said Vodka was okay. Failure. When the Vodka ran out I went back for more vodka or if the store was closed, went to the bar and drank beers.
Those are a few of things I tried, and I failed at. I failed at them because my body reacts to alcohol differently than it does in say my wife or my brothers. Couple that with a mind that's obsessed with the notion of being able to enjoy alcohol, and a nature that's restless, irritable, discontent, resentful, selfish, self-centered, fearful, etc.. etc....
I came to the conclusion I must be what that book described as an alcoholic. Which means I've abandoned any and all hope that I can drink alcohol safely, responsibly, and without adverse consequences to my health (spiritual, mental and physical), my life and the lives of the people that love me, my community, etc.. etc..
I did find that there's a wonderful life on the other side, that life abstaining from alcohol can be rich, fullfilling, joyful, sorrowful, and the full range of human experiences available to me - experiences I was denying myself sitting and drinking - being scared, being resentful, being lazy, and being - drunk.
All that being said, if I could make the right about face and drink like a gentlemen, I wouldn't be posting this message - I'd be out drinking like a gentlemen.
If you can do it. Rock on and enjoy it.
instant
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Australia
Posts: 5,711
TJT you summed up a lot of stuff there. I always wonder why I never really drank spirits, for me it has always been beer and wine. I did however try most of the "techniques" you mentioned, funnily enough with similar results.
TTP it might be a good idea to get some professional advice about your withdrawal risk, and options thereof
TTP it might be a good idea to get some professional advice about your withdrawal risk, and options thereof
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 3
TJT....ok point made...and I understand....because I have also caught myself rationalizing my problem away also. I am here because I feel dependant....not because I'm a drunk. In fact I rarely if ever get drunk. Just cant control myself from using alcohol to maintain that "confortably numb" feeling that just makes your troubles seem to go away.....Ok, they dont go away, but it relieves some of the physical symptoms, if that makes sence. So, I am here, because I do realize I am dependant, and thats not where I want to be. Maybe just looking for a fer cheerleaders to help me get where I want to be. BTW....first day here....and not much to cheer aabout....maybe tomarrow....
Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Northern Virginia
Posts: 449
Consider me a cheerleader for your success in finding your truth no matter what it is. Be it a man who can handle himself and drink on HIS terms. Or a man like myself, who cannot.
Life can be grand either way. My brother is very happy, adjusted and content with his occasional drinking - sometimes a little much but NOT like me at all. I am more happy, adjusted and content with my abstinence from drinking than I ever was drinking and I wish everyone the same thing I wish for myself. Continual growth in spirit,, knowledge, prosperity, usefulness and contentedness.
Rah Rah Brah
Life can be grand either way. My brother is very happy, adjusted and content with his occasional drinking - sometimes a little much but NOT like me at all. I am more happy, adjusted and content with my abstinence from drinking than I ever was drinking and I wish everyone the same thing I wish for myself. Continual growth in spirit,, knowledge, prosperity, usefulness and contentedness.
Rah Rah Brah
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: western pennsylvania
Posts: 5
Turningthepage:
I am new here also. My husband is an alcoholic. I think the fact that you can admit you have a problem is fantastic. Not many can see that they do! I wish you well and hope you can find the help you seek. This is a great place to start.
TW
I am new here also. My husband is an alcoholic. I think the fact that you can admit you have a problem is fantastic. Not many can see that they do! I wish you well and hope you can find the help you seek. This is a great place to start.
TW
Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: San Diego
Posts: 77
Hi Turningthe page,
Welcome, I am new here as well (Day 13 without alcohol). I have tried cutting back, but when stress gets to be too much my glass of wine turns to a bottle or two. This is a great site with amazing support.
Glad you are here.
Welcome, I am new here as well (Day 13 without alcohol). I have tried cutting back, but when stress gets to be too much my glass of wine turns to a bottle or two. This is a great site with amazing support.
Glad you are here.
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