4feathers

I am planning to attend my first step meeting on Sun. I am nervous because If I tell them I have been sober since Jan will they ask alot of questions or even think I do not need to be there.

Even though I am sober I still have thoughts of drinking. How long does it take for those thoughts to go away or will they always be with me. I try to remind myself how horrible things were when I was drinking, all the stupid things I did or even let happen.

least

The only requirement for being in AA is a desire to stop drinking. That's all. I don't think they'll 'ask questions' about your sober time, will more likely congratulate you for it.

You don't have to talk, ya know. You can just say "I'm so-and-so and I just want to listen."

Like anything else, you'll get out of it what you put into it... so give it your all.

nandm

I would not worry about telling them you have been sober since January. I have seen many people come into AA with a few months of sober time before they decided to try AA. I find that to be a positive thing and have never heard anyone question it. I think you will find the most people will do is congratulate you on the time not question it. Also just like Least said you are not required to talk in the meetings, you can always pass. No one will judge you for it. I have been in AA for ten years now and I have passed many times and at times still do.

As far as thoughts about drinking, I had those for several months before they went away. I still have them at times today but they are fleeting not an obsession like they were in early sobriety. One thing that I found that provided relief from these thoughts was jumping in and working the steps of AA early in sobriety. They are the core of the AA program and are what will help you the most. The meetings, and social aspect of AA are important but without working the steps it is hard to stay sober for very long. At least that is what I have seen.

I do hope you find that AA provides you with the hope, strength, and courage I found in the rooms. Take care and keep us posted.

reggiewayne

The only questions you'll get are "would like some more coffee". That's it. I think you'll be pleasently surprised. I remember when I went to my first meeting, I thought everyone would be staring at me, asking me questions, trying to convert me to their religion, etc... I was wrong about all of it.

The realy problem is me. I am my own worst enemy and AA offers a different way of life. When you go to the meeting just look around and compare the results of what you see. Are the people sober, happy, content, honest, and helpful? I know I was none of those when I entered the rooms.

AA has changed my life. It's not the only plan, but it is the only thing that has worked for me.

Best of luck to you!

Anna

I'm glad you are taking action to help your recovery.

cabledude

To do this right, show up 15 minutes early and let the people know you're new to AA. They'll make you comfortable and answer your questions before and/or after the meeting.

You need not talk unless you choose to, you have the right to pass if called on, or say a few words about whatever you want.

It's an error to rabbit after the meeting's over. Stick around and let people get to know you a bit.

I'm interested in hearing how it goes.

Gorpus

Yeah, just like everybody said, you will not be questioned. people will just be happy that you are there.
You are headed in the right direction

EmeraldRose

I can understand your worries...but they are all just people like you and I. They have a different perspective of people than 'normal' people who may 'judge' you. They are glad you are there regardless of sobriety. If you give them a small history on yourself they won't have the need to ask anything.
I couldn't wait for my first meeting. The first thing that happened was I lost my job, the next day I called a counseling service, had to wait till the following Thursday to get to a meeting. I went with the intent that it was ALL for me. I really didn't care who was there, what they would ask, how they would feel about me...I knew in my heart that I had to be there and I had to take the initiative to make it work -for me.
You'll be fine...Sunday is a few days away...keep busy.

4feathers

OK I went to the Sun meeting..it was not a step meeting but I did and could relate to what was said. I did find out that the step meeting is on Mon night.
After reading some other post I did show up early only one person spoke to me and did not so called rabbit rabbit after, still no one talked to me.....
The one thing that I will keep with me from the meeting is someone was talking about how we are imprinted growing up and all the drinking would cover up those thoughts in your head. But know I am left with all those negative thoughts of I am not good enough, not going to amount to anything etc..You know the rest, enough said.
Over the weekend I really wanted to drink to re leave the anxiety and worry about going. I came so close to going and getting a (liquor) bottle and drinking. I do not want to ruin my sober date and feel utterly shameful and back into that worthlessness.
I will be going to the Mon night meeting hopefully people there will not make me feel like an outsider. I just want to be and feel welcome and like I belong. If I can not obtain that I do not know how much longer I can do this on my on.

There is also a Wed night women's meeting..the one thing said about that was it was a good place to find a sponsor.
question How do you determine who would be a good sponsor ?

So that is my update.....

implosion

I understand exactly what you are saying. I've been trying to quit by myself for close to seven years now and just recently relapsed after 4 months. I'm sick of the struggle and have committed myself to getting help. Tuesday is my first AA meeting. I'm nervous...talking about something that I have held close to me to a bunch of strangers is not on the top of my list.

I do feel that so many people get so much from it, that is must be worth the effort. I'll let you know how Tuesday goes. Good luck!

Boleo

Tradition #5 "Each group has but one primary purpose-to carry its message to the alcoholic who still suffers."

Note; the word suffers can mean anyone with any amount of clean time. The length of time it takes thoughts of drinking to go away is dependent on action, not calender days.

4feathers

That is interesting you said 4 months I have 4 months and have been wanting to drink so I realized I can not do this by myself.

CarolD

I'm pleased you are interested in AA.....it's been an awesome adventure
for me for 22 years....on how to live alcohol free and enjoy it...

Yes the key is the Steps....that is the AA program.

Here is the official AA guideline on sponsorship...it's often on the free literature rack at meeting

http://www.aa.org/lang/en/catalog.cf...y=4&product=17

implosion

After 4 months my recent relapse came unexpectedly. It wasn't premeditated at all. I was offered a drink and accepted. I had lost focus. The pain of addiction had left my mind, and the happiness with my current situation had caused me to put my guard down.

Of course the one drink, in a months time, led to a three day bender

I'm hoping AA, more than anything will be something I enjoy and at the same time keep me in the right mind frame.