mesh12121

So i started yesterday after a 4 day binge drink on wine....i've been drinking for 17 yrs usually beer...wine and harder alcoho.has put me in detox 3 times...1st detox was 0.0463...i laughed that off and drank the day i got out....this last time i didn't get a bac...well i'm sure i was tested but i was to out of it to ask...had hallucinations...very vivid...the worst....it got to the point that they wanted my wife to get a lawyer for guardianship in case i never got out of the state i was in.....stayed sober for 17 days only bcuz i was pink slipped....drank the day i got out....i'm being honest in saying that i never took it seriously til now....i hit my first 2 meetings yesterday....and was suprised...the main topic was on step 3....i was thinking o.k. here come the jesus freaks(i don't mean to sound rude but that's what i thought)to save me... i couldn't of been more wrong...so many people have the same fear i did....contemplate god much deeper than i woulda thought from this small litttle hick town in ohio....really putting effort againsst organized religion..not for the sake of being anti god but anti pre-packaged organized religion.i was shocked and hooked. I thought i was special...i think there was one traditional catholic there...I was at my 2nd meeting 2 hours later!!!...as far as my detox...last night sucked i bought a 12 pack because i was shaky/pukey...and this is something people can have problems with but i do see this as a win for me...i drank 2 beers and stopped. Not the whole 12 like i normally would or planned...i think i left the remaining ten there to tempt me.....i went from 11:30 last night til 5 a.m.thinking about drinking it and never did...screw it that's a win and i'm taking it..prayed meditated and shook all night!woke up throwing up today after 2 1/2 hrs of sleep...won't even try to eat right now...and will be hitting meetings today....someone there with alot of time said something so simple....all ya have to do is stay sober today.....tomorrow will take care of itself...talk about breakin it down to simplistic terms...meetings are a mandatory for me now!!!!!!!!!!! For anyone whose on the fense about going to a.a. do yourself a favor set your hangups aside and go...it may not work for ya.....it would of saved me ten+years!!!!