First post here - forth day dry
First post here - forth day dry
Hi everybody,
I'm 49 and have been a binge drinker since high school, but about two years ago I started ramping it up to five or six days a week. Things really started to slip...mistakes at work...I stopped doing the recreational and creative things that used to fulfill me...my emotions became so numb my wife started commenting on my empty eyes...our daughter missed her playful dad...being hungover in the morning felt normal...partial blackouts were the norm...and I was getting double vision in the mornings.
I recently started to learn about how chronic use of alcohol changes ones limbic system in the base of the brain, allowing it to in effect lead the rest of the brain by the nose into doing what it knows is absolutely detrimental to its own good. It empowers me to know why the cravings are coming, that it isn't some unknown voice in my head urging me to drink.
I mean really, if I made one list of all the things I'm proud to have done while drunk, and another list of all the things I'm ashamed to have done while drunk, the second list would be 10,000 times longer!!!!!!!!!!!
This seems like an open minded, respectful, supportive forum; I'm looking forward to leaning on everyone of your shoulders and learning what the path to sobriety has in store for me.
Murray
I'm 49 and have been a binge drinker since high school, but about two years ago I started ramping it up to five or six days a week. Things really started to slip...mistakes at work...I stopped doing the recreational and creative things that used to fulfill me...my emotions became so numb my wife started commenting on my empty eyes...our daughter missed her playful dad...being hungover in the morning felt normal...partial blackouts were the norm...and I was getting double vision in the mornings.
I recently started to learn about how chronic use of alcohol changes ones limbic system in the base of the brain, allowing it to in effect lead the rest of the brain by the nose into doing what it knows is absolutely detrimental to its own good. It empowers me to know why the cravings are coming, that it isn't some unknown voice in my head urging me to drink.
I mean really, if I made one list of all the things I'm proud to have done while drunk, and another list of all the things I'm ashamed to have done while drunk, the second list would be 10,000 times longer!!!!!!!!!!!
This seems like an open minded, respectful, supportive forum; I'm looking forward to leaning on everyone of your shoulders and learning what the path to sobriety has in store for me.
Murray
Welcome Murry ,
were glad you found us , do look around there lots of support and wonderful ppl behind that support , Even a chatroom come in and have coffee with us one day , we dont bite . Huggles Endzy
were glad you found us , do look around there lots of support and wonderful ppl behind that support , Even a chatroom come in and have coffee with us one day , we dont bite . Huggles Endzy
Hi Murray, welcome to SR, it is nice to have you with us, i am sure you will find lots of informative information here and great people to give you loads of advice. Well done on day 4!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Chepstow
Posts: 359
Hi Murray,
Congratulations on four days; it's not easy; I know from experience, but really you need to do something to help you stay stopped for the long term.
I found my solution in AA, but there are other programmes about, and I would suggest that you find some sort of outside help because you may find, even though your intentions may be to stay stopped, that you cannot.
Kind regards,
Tosh
Congratulations on four days; it's not easy; I know from experience, but really you need to do something to help you stay stopped for the long term.
I found my solution in AA, but there are other programmes about, and I would suggest that you find some sort of outside help because you may find, even though your intentions may be to stay stopped, that you cannot.
Kind regards,
Tosh
Hi Murray and welcome! I'm glad you posted. You're not alone. The last two years of my drinking were about like yours. I started caring less and less about myself and often drank just to feel normal or get through the day. It wasn't even about enjoying a drink anymore. And the hangovers just got worse and worse (many mornings just laying in bed).
Congratulations on 4 days and I hope to see you around. This is a great place- I come here at least twice a day - it really helps me stay sober.
Congratulations on 4 days and I hope to see you around. This is a great place- I come here at least twice a day - it really helps me stay sober.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: SoCal
Posts: 4,491
Welcome Murray.
Congratulations to making it to Day 4.
I am only two days ahead of you but just wanted to let you know that SR has been very helpful. Checking in here morning and night has helped keep me on track.
Congratulations to making it to Day 4.
I am only two days ahead of you but just wanted to let you know that SR has been very helpful. Checking in here morning and night has helped keep me on track.
Thanks for the warm welcome folks!
I went to the drugstore a couple days ago to buy multivitamins, and was confused by there being so many choices. It took a couple minutes to summon the courage, but I asked to talk to the pharmacist and told him that I had quit drinking alcohol recently, and was there a multivitamin he would recommend. (That was the first time I had admitted to anybody other than myself that I had a drinking problem). When he found out my diet was good he recommended a B complex with 100mg of the B's and a few other things in it. Yesterday, it seemed to help a lot, as I had energy left at the end of a hot, hot day at work.
Feeling good about day five!
Murray
I went to the drugstore a couple days ago to buy multivitamins, and was confused by there being so many choices. It took a couple minutes to summon the courage, but I asked to talk to the pharmacist and told him that I had quit drinking alcohol recently, and was there a multivitamin he would recommend. (That was the first time I had admitted to anybody other than myself that I had a drinking problem). When he found out my diet was good he recommended a B complex with 100mg of the B's and a few other things in it. Yesterday, it seemed to help a lot, as I had energy left at the end of a hot, hot day at work.
Feeling good about day five!
Murray
Murray,
Good for you for speaking up and asking the pharmacist for the correct vitamin. It was a huge step and struggle to ever say it out loud that I was having problems with drinking. My first time was over the phone to some 1-800 number. Oh boy I was sloppy-crying. It sounds like you kept your composure better than I did. That's awesome and now you have the correct vitamin to boot!
Great step on taking the vitamins. I know for me that just knowing that I am feeding my body vitamins, water, and other healthy stuff is one more motivator to stay sober.
Keep us posted on your progress!
Good for you for speaking up and asking the pharmacist for the correct vitamin. It was a huge step and struggle to ever say it out loud that I was having problems with drinking. My first time was over the phone to some 1-800 number. Oh boy I was sloppy-crying. It sounds like you kept your composure better than I did. That's awesome and now you have the correct vitamin to boot!
Great step on taking the vitamins. I know for me that just knowing that I am feeding my body vitamins, water, and other healthy stuff is one more motivator to stay sober.
Keep us posted on your progress!
Murray, I think of it as 4 days of mental clarity. Everyday your mind gets healthier and you feel better. We are all right there with you. Also the comment about,"alcohol changes ones limbic system in the base of the brain, allowing it to in effect lead the rest of the brain by the nose into doing what it knows is absolutely detrimental to its own good. " is so very true. I wish more people would understand this fact. At least you won't be lead around by the autonomous actions of the body. I know I refuse to be fooled.
Coming here is good for staying focused. I am not really into AA so this helps tons.
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