Lazyboy

Gave the wife grocery list and check for shopping.......booze was not on list...get home and my nemisis Gin and pearl onions is on the counter......Ive heard for years about drinking too many tini's and well I dont get it .......this is the second time she has provided me with temptation this week......am i missisng something or does she not like me sober....or god forbid like me hammered better......gang im in trouble....
Lazyboy:wtf2

Dee74

Many members here deal with spouses who just don't get it Lazyboy - that's why we have SR - 24/7.

You'd know her motives better than anyone else here would, LB.
what happened with the talk last time?

D

Lazyboy

Said she understands........then this temptation ..her dad was an alcoholic......think this has something to do with this? I dont know my Whole family is alcoholics..............lazyboy

aasharon90

Sickness or illness's do
affect the entire family.

And that is why there is
a program to accommidate
all of them too.

Dont let temptations side
track u. Wear ur recovery
amour to protect urself
everyday.

I challange
anyone to a duel if they
stand between me and
my recovery.

Thank you Thank You
Thank you very much..!

Anna

I hope that you can focus on your sobriety LB.

And, as Dee said, one of the reasons we come here is because we DO understand.

Dee74

I don't know lazyboy.

A lot of my friends and my family tried to ply me with drinks too - whatever the various reasons they had, I had to remember I was in a dark and horrible place when I drank - and I nearly died.

That's pretty good motivation to resist any temptation.

If the gins just for you, I'd dump it - make it plain where your intentions lie.

D

least

Yeah, dump the damn gin and leave the empty bottle on the counter as a reminder to her not to get any more. Just because she brought it home doesn't mean you have to drink it. It's for you to do with as you please, so it's yours to pour out.

smacked

When you told her that you quit drinking, for good, what did she misinterpret?

Bars sell drinks, doesn't mean ill take them up on the offer. Casinos around here serve free drinks..my choice is to pass.

I agree with the other posters, pour it out, remind her that you're an alcoholic and that drinking will kill you.

At the end of the day, however..your sobriety is yours to protect..and she will never understand. Maybe do the shoppin next time so no liquor happens to fall in the cart.

suki44883

Yeah, I'd pour it out, leave the empty bottle on the counter with a note taped to it saying...I Don't Do This Anymore. Maybe then she'll get the hint.

Horselover

I have to say that does upset me to read that your spouse is trying to undermine your efforts to remain sober. I definitely would pour it out and have a seriously long conversation with her. You are stronger then the temptation.

SomeoneSomwhere

Um yeah seriously! I'm glad I'm not the only one. I told this one girl that I'm an alcoholic and that it's a serious problem and I'm trying to get sober. Today is only Day 1 for me. Earlier she was begging me to go to the bar with her. I stood my ground and didn't go and I explained to her why.

Two hours ago she texted me asking me to go to a party. Just now she texted me again saying she really wants to go to the bar and she'll pay for my drinks and "make sure" I don't get to drunk.

Yeah, thats gonna work really well considering I can't even control how much I drink, I'm sure YOU can. Ugh I really don't understand people. I think they just like don't GET it. Or something.

Your wife is aware you're in recovery I assume? So yes it does seem very strange to me that she would do this but God knows what justifies peoples actions. Maybe they just think that it's easy for us to just not drink...like just because we're trying to get better it means like... we could just stop at one drink. Or that it's easy to resist...I don't know. But I guess if you're not an alcoholic you can't imagine what it's like, can't really put yourself in that person's shoes because they're not addicted. It's easier for them just to think that we can just... be like them and control ourselves

This girl who has been texting me is kind of an idiot. She is a girl I used as an excuse to get drunk a lot so at least...it kind of makes sense. But she's seen me like... well on some bad nights, which is why I'm surprised that she's being the way she is...it shocks me even more that your WIFE is doing this...

suki44883

I can't imagine trying to not drink while living with people who just don't understand and buy liquor or reward me with drinks for not drinking! It just makes no sense to me. I agree you need to sit her down and impress upon her the seriousness of the situation. Like I asked last time...would she give a peanut butter sandwich to someone allergic to peanuts?

NellieM

My husband continued to bring me wine for about a month after I stopped. No worries, someone else in the house made sure it didn't go to waste. He finally gets it, I'm not drinking. Hasn't changed his drinking any, but that's his problem. I'm staying focused on mine. It's tough, but if you don't crack the seal, or you pour it out, you'll be fine.

splendra

Sometimes the people I love the most will throw a monkey wrench and not even have a clue as to how it hurts me. At times like this I have to do whatever it takes to take care of myself.

One thing I have learned about recovery is that it is an inside job and it can also be quite lonely and there will be times that the only comfort I will find is to turn it over to my HP.

Ronan

I don't really know your full story but I'm guessing your wife isn't an alcoholic? I think that might be the problem. For me it was always absolutely crazy that people could have a few drinks and then just stop and not be bothered with any more. I guess it's the same for how we, the people who will drink and drink and drink, look to those people that can stop. Some regular people will just never understand our problem.

I know I would definitely not be able to stay sober with the things going on around me that your wife has done. You've gotta get this sorted with her mate.

Emmy69

I had a similar problem when I first quit. Looking back it may have been because I didn't make it clear to her "I'm quitting for good!" I had many failed attempts before so I think I didn't want to look like an idiot by declaring once again I'm done drinking.

She knows now that I'm serious and doesn't try to get me to drink anymore, although she still drinks every night. Oh well...

Hang in there and keep reading and posting on SR. it makes a huge difference!

AmericanGirl

I agree with everyone: pour it out and make it clear to your wife that you want to quit permanently. I know this can be a terrifying thing to say. I think only your wife can know exactly what she is feeling, but one other thing might be that she is afraid of change. Most of us are. Good luck!

Lazyboy

Thanks everyone your the greatest!
Lazyboy

Kmber2010

Lazy, again I read this and am sorry to hear this is going on. I agree with everyone...toss the booze and leave her a note.....Just stop!

It is wonderful to have support on the homefront but we are the ones who ultimately keep ourselves sober. I pray daily to give me strength because I have been tempted but I remember where I who and what I was when I was a drunk and never again.

Just keep on posting my friend. You have our support and I know you can do this.

GreatGonzoChops

i like the pouring it down the drain part... but my note would say "The next bottle of gin brought into this house is going to be put somewhere where it hurts YOU a lot more than ME."