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Hi from another newbie

Old 04-01-2010, 02:50 AM
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Smile Hi from another newbie

I probably have the same story as many of you. Me, I only wanted to cut down, so thought maybe weekend drink would be okay. Didn't drink all last week then did a whopper from Friday afternoon till Sunday afternoon. Was so disgusted with myself, haven't again had a drink since Sunday early evening.

Now I am beginning to think (or do I actually already know this & who am I trying to fool) that I shouldn't be drinking "just" on weekends either?

I thought I was coming down with the flu when I stopped. I don't think I have been a day without a drink in perhaps 10-12 years - self medicating very heavily for the last 7, before that 35 years perhaps, I "only" drank regularly... I still have that awful headachy feeling, insomnia bad, sleeping max 5 hours at a stretch, thankful the entire body itchy seems to be gone, although the aches and pains still bothersome, take an aspirin every night when I go to bed.

I quite smoking mid January this year (pack & 1/2 - 2 packs a day for the last 20 years) and that is going just fine, so I guess I can do just about anything, right!

When I visit my brother in the US, I used to go to his AA meetings with him, just to keep him "company". My brothers (2 sober thanks to AA and 1 still in denial) have no idea of my problem . They always say that I am so lucky that the women in the family didn't get the "curse". Makes it hard, always being so perfect, I am very well behaved when around them. I will next week be visiting again, this time for 2 months, staying with one of my sober brothers. I think I need to come clean with him?

Just wish me luck. Will continue reading all the posts which have given me inspiration these past days to NOT drink. I need to do this or I know it will kill me.

Thanks to all of you for being there and your support.

P.s. will try to get a picture, update profile... not real good at these things!
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Old 04-01-2010, 03:03 AM
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welcome to the family life

perhaps,

if you want to keep that life, live it, and learn how to enjoy it without a drink...

dont pick up that first drink.

as it's the first drink, that gets us drunk...

good wishes life

zip
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Old 04-01-2010, 03:05 AM
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hey life,

love you profile picture,

sheesh, talk about keeping ir simple!
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Old 04-01-2010, 05:10 AM
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Welcome to SR! I'm glad you decided to stop drinking. Living sober is SO much better.
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Old 04-01-2010, 05:17 AM
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Welcome LifeIs, glad like me you have found this place. Its been a god send for me. Its really good to be able to talk to people that understand what we are going through! I only joined yesterday but have read so many posts and have been given some really good advice. You have made a big decision and I guess like me need as much support as you can get!!!
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Old 04-01-2010, 06:28 AM
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Welcome to our recovery community.....

Glad to know you are seeking a healthier sober future

I too had been a long time drinker before AA.
It's been an awesome adventure for me
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Old 04-01-2010, 08:54 AM
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Welcome, Life!

Yep, I did the same thing - only on weekends - till weekends turned into week days that turned into week nights - you got it - it only gets progressively worse. And struggling to not pick up in between at first in order to try and fool ourselves into thinking 'we don't have a problem' cuz we only drink on weekends...uhmmm, not so much. For me, it was a train wreck waiting to happen.

Being the so-called 'perfect one' in the family only made things worse - my exterior success and 'got-it-all-together' appearance was a total sham. There's no dishonesty worse than the dishonesty with yourself, I think.

For me, I continued the facade until I spiraled out of control. I live in another state so my family didn't see what I was doing. I never took the chance to ask my family for help - my alcoholism decided for me because it got so bad that the truth was exposed - I'm grateful that it wasn't exposed through a fatality - which was on the way to happening.

I wish you well in getting honest with yourself. It's not about luck.

Take care ~
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Old 04-01-2010, 10:06 AM
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Welcome LifeIs -

Using your name, Life Is a lot more than drinking alcohol.

Given your family history, I think it is great that you are taking this very seriously. As has been said, this is progressive.

Life Is about honesty - with yourself and others. Try to stop drinking and see what happens.

You have made a great first step. Keep posting and learning. Glad you are here.
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Old 04-01-2010, 10:59 AM
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Welcome!

I'm glad that you decided you have a problem with drinking and are ready to deal with it.

It sounds like you will have some good family support from your brothers.
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Old 04-01-2010, 11:12 AM
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Welcome LifeIs....

I found this place just yesterday, when i am feeling weak i just start reading. These folks are a life saver. Just keep reading and keep posting, we will be there for you. :ghug3
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Old 04-01-2010, 11:35 AM
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Anna,

I think they will be shocked... we will see. I know that I need to come out with it, but it is hard after pretending all these years. I can't bear that I will no longer be the tough, centered one that everyone has always looked up to and admired.

I am looking forward to attending AA meetings while there, I don't have that opportunity here. I will be strong!

thanks for all the words of encouragement.

Last edited by LifeIs; 04-01-2010 at 11:46 AM. Reason: This post was meant to be in response to Anna's message.
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Old 04-01-2010, 11:45 AM
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Welcome to the family, LifeIs. SR made all the difference to me - I wasn't alone any more, and I gained the strength to quit.

I think it's a great idea to confide in your brother. Once I came clean about my alcohol dependency, I felt a huge burden lifted from me. I hope it'll be the same for you. I'm glad you are reaching out for a new and better life.
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Old 04-01-2010, 03:24 PM
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Welcome LifeIs

As you've already seen, you'll find a lot of support here.

I hope your family and loved ones react positively, but remember you'll always find help support experience and understanding here

D
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Old 04-01-2010, 03:34 PM
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Welcome!
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