when did i become a drunk
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 24
jesus my life has been one major car crash ,,i havent had a drink in 5 months and i,m bored ,i built up a business from scratch but always felt like a fraud ,i had no friends as i never really felt comfortable enough with myself to relax in anyones company unless i was drinking and then i probably just came across the wrong way ,,anyway i eventually blew my business got into a load of debt and lost my home ,,i moved away with a new girlfriend i had just met after all of my family had basically disowned me ,,i,m due to get released from bankruptcy in a few months and am scared that i wont have the strength to get back to work and start again ,,i,m about to hit 42 and prior to giving up the bottle i had been a serious drinker since my 20,s at the end i was downing a bottle and half of scotch everyday and i mean everyday before really discovering a love for scotch i had been on a diet of a minimum of 3 bottles of red a day ,,the only days i didnt drink this much wine were the days i had cocaine the wine had been at this level for about 10 years ,,,,after 5 months i was expecting my thoughts to be a little clearer ,and although i do feel better i still cant stop analysing everything ,,i even think about what people think of me ,and i,m talking people that i hardly know ,,,just always thinking thinking thinking ,,,
PAWS stands for : Post Acute Withdrawal Symptom. google it, it explains a lot about our minds when we are getting sober. I found it helpful to read up on it. I had a symptom just this morning. I woke up scared, wondering if I had drank last night and couldn't remember how or when I had gotten to bed like I used to when I blacked out everynight. About 5 minutes later I realized I had gone to bed sober and at 12:30.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 24
Hi. I'd just like to say that I highlighted a "win" in your post.
You said you quit, and that you feel better. That is a win. Congratulations.
And you've successfully established a business. That it was in the past does not alter that fact.
Anyway, you have more time than I have, and to hear people say: "five months, feeling better" is a win.
A win for me too, to read it, because it is proof that five or more months is possible even if things are not going super-easy.
So, thanks for posting.
You said you quit, and that you feel better. That is a win. Congratulations.
And you've successfully established a business. That it was in the past does not alter that fact.
Anyway, you have more time than I have, and to hear people say: "five months, feeling better" is a win.
A win for me too, to read it, because it is proof that five or more months is possible even if things are not going super-easy.
So, thanks for posting.
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: NJ
Posts: 20,458
you are bored and you are quite intelligent....seek out some new things to accomplish, develop some new habits...look at your free time as a GIFT, because you will soon be working, (and it might not be the *perfect* job)...
I am reminded of an old episode of HOUSE....where he gives up his Vicodan, after rehab he is out of work and bored....he takes cooking classes and becomes a gourmet cook.... i would give my left thumb if I came home to a fresh meal every night.
I am reminded of an old episode of HOUSE....where he gives up his Vicodan, after rehab he is out of work and bored....he takes cooking classes and becomes a gourmet cook.... i would give my left thumb if I came home to a fresh meal every night.
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: NJ
Posts: 20,458
Longdays. FYI, I'm a woman, not a dude....your missus is very lucky that you cook, but obsessing about the price of a mini-bottle is not a good thing.
so, find something else you have always wanted to do to entertain yourself.
so, find something else you have always wanted to do to entertain yourself.
Hi and welcome.
Have you ever considered going to A? They have a really good program which teaches us how to live a happy, joyous, free sober life.
Just connnecting with people in the meetings face to face can be very helpful when you are feeling like you are right now. You've got nothing to lose by just going to a meeting.
Have you ever considered going to A? They have a really good program which teaches us how to live a happy, joyous, free sober life.
Just connnecting with people in the meetings face to face can be very helpful when you are feeling like you are right now. You've got nothing to lose by just going to a meeting.
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