Originally Posted by longdays

jesus my life has been one major car crash ,,i havent had a drink in 5 months and i,m bored ,i built up a business from scratch but always felt like a fraud ,i had no friends as i never really felt comfortable enough with myself to relax in anyones company unless i was drinking and then i probably just came across the wrong way ,,anyway i eventually blew my business got into a load of debt and lost my home ,,i moved away with a new girlfriend i had just met after all of my family had basically disowned me ,,i,m due to get released from bankruptcy in a few months and am scared that i wont have the strength to get back to work and start again ,,i,m about to hit 42 and prior to giving up the bottle i had been a serious drinker since my 20,s at the end i was downing a bottle and half of scotch everyday and i mean everyday before really discovering a love for scotch i had been on a diet of a minimum of 3 bottles of red a day ,,the only days i didnt drink this much wine were the days i had cocaine the wine had been at this level for about 10 years ,,,,after 5 months i was expecting my thoughts to be a little clearer ,and although i do feel better i still cant stop analysing everything ,,i even think about what people think of me ,and i,m talking people that i hardly know ,,,just always thinking thinking thinking ,,,