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Old 02-05-2010, 08:02 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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There's a lot of fear involved in stopping, I know - but your addictive side will gladly use that fear to stop you from actually doing anything.

I let my fear completely rule me until I was drinking everyday, all day...I wish I'd had the courage to act sooner, Donna.

It is scary, but you have a ton of support here...and you may find it at that meeting too when you decide to go.

You're not alone
D
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Old 02-05-2010, 09:14 PM
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and thank you too happier and clearlyheaded good luck and continued sobriety... your so strong already... the fear is unreal, the sweet taste of nectar whispering my name so strong.. I'm kinda lost on this site as to where I can find a thread to help.. they all help but seems like I'm going arund in cirlcles... wish I could just put the glass down..
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Old 02-05-2010, 10:18 PM
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Putting the glass down is the first step Donna - it all comes from there.

Until I stepped out of the 'drunks perspective' it was very hard for me to find my way - I just kept returning to the same points, over and over....

Drinking not a solution, it just keeps you in a holding pattern.
Nothing changes if nothing changes.

D
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Old 02-06-2010, 02:01 AM
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I guess it is human nature to leave what is familiar and comforting..... my goal tomorrow is to sit down with my common law husband and tell him.. then go to an aa meeting tomorrow night....... no i didn't list "not drinking" as a goal... the first two are all I can deal with at the present.... thank you all so much for your insight, knowledge, experience and support... this is what I truely eneeded..
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Old 02-06-2010, 05:00 AM
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Hi Donna, I hope you can get to that meeting. If you have "open" meetings in your husband can go with you, if that would help.

Good luck.
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Old 02-06-2010, 08:02 AM
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Good morning everyone... it's a beautiful day out today ... yet I sit here with the alcholics morning after... sat and sun mornings are the worste for me because I drink so much on frid and sat.. I have decided that I am going to tell my bf tomorrow... I still have wine left for tonight and quite frankly I have no idea why I can't just tell him today...but i will tomorrow..not going to a meeting but will attend a meeting here tonight or whenever it is.. still have alll the amotions about quiting but kind of relieved I can see an end to this madness... not sure how I will feel once I start detoxing...lol thanks so much everyone
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Old 02-06-2010, 08:58 AM
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Hi Donna,
I guess you won't tell him today because you want to drink today. When you're ready, you're ready. When you're done, you're done.

We will be here when that time comes. Enjoy that meeting if you get to to.
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Old 02-06-2010, 09:54 AM
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don't really want to drink...... scared to death to tell him... not sure if our relationship is going to be able to handle this.... if it can't I would rather only have one day to dwell on it instead of two..
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Old 02-06-2010, 12:42 PM
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I don't claim to have myself figured out and certinaly do not have any idea what is best for other individuals. It sounds to me like you have set good goals. Only you know the timing but I am guessing none will be much easier than the other. Like I mentioned, just thinking about steps in the right direction is hard and you've already done that and more. Let's all just help each other keep moving in that direction : )
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Old 02-06-2010, 01:28 PM
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Originally Posted by DonnaT View Post
don't really want to drink...... scared to death to tell him... not sure if our relationship is going to be able to handle this.... if it can't I would rather only have one day to dwell on it instead of two..
Hi Donna,

I hope it goes well for you. After all, you are just not going to be drinking in the future....so I hope that does not affect your relationship too much in the short term.
good luck.
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Old 02-06-2010, 02:05 PM
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Phew.... I feel soooo much better... I told him!!!! he is being very supportive and yes he has suspected for a while now but didn't want to say anything... the only thing that is bothering me is now he wants to go to my Dr. appt on Mon with me which is fine, but then on Tues I have an appt for assessment with an addictions cousler and he wants to go to that one too.. he is talking about canceling some of his business trips so he is not away overnight... so now I am feeling like I am a glass bubble.... is this normal????
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Old 02-06-2010, 02:09 PM
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I am stilll drinking because I am afraid of the effects of detoxing... I have not had one evening in the past two months with alchohal in my system so I want to see what my dr. say mon morning... right now I am just sipping to keep the jonesing at bay...
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Old 02-06-2010, 02:15 PM
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Hi Donna

I'm glad you told him
Maybe he's just trying to be supportive?

I know from my personal experience you can be too supportive tho LOL.
This is your journey and you have to walk it.

You're entitled to your space - if him being there will invade your comfort zone, or stop you from being 100% honest, then I guess maybe you have to ask him, gently, to let you do this yourself?

D
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Old 02-06-2010, 02:58 PM
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Originally Posted by DonnaT View Post
Phew.... I feel soooo much better... I told him!!!! he is being very supportive and yes he has suspected for a while now but didn't want to say anything... the only thing that is bothering me is now he wants to go to my Dr. appt on Mon with me which is fine, but then on Tues I have an appt for assessment with an addictions cousler and he wants to go to that one too.. he is talking about canceling some of his business trips so he is not away overnight... so now I am feeling like I am a glass bubble.... is this normal????
Well done, Donna. That must be a huge relief. And what a good man you have there.

Admitting we need help is difficult, perhaps that's why you feel like you are in a glass bubble but it is good to have him around, particularly if you are going to detox.

I understand about the drinking until Monday. Going to see your doctor is a very good move.
Keep us updated.
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Old 02-06-2010, 03:41 PM
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Thank you dee and intension... I thought maybe people would think I was making excuses for continue to drink through the weekend but I already start go through withdrawals after 12hrs with no alcohal... I right now am drinking in moderation...lol
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Old 02-06-2010, 03:47 PM
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Originally Posted by DonnaT View Post
... I already start go through withdrawals after 12hrs with no alcohal... I right now am drinking in moderation...lol
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html
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