Anyone Cracked Alcohol Dependancy Without ?.

Old 01-31-2010, 05:27 AM
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Anyone Cracked Alcohol Dependancy Without ?.

would be interested to know... As i hear so many voices saying its impossible
you,ll fall at the first hurdle, will power alone is not enough? anybody able to
go against this popular belief ,an go against the grain, and come up trumps?
would like to hear any stories.. If there is any??????
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Old 01-31-2010, 05:29 AM
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bona fido dog-lover
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There are many people here on SR who have won over alcohol without outside help. It IS possible.
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Old 01-31-2010, 05:38 AM
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I quit drinking about a year ago when my wife gave me an ultimatum to quit or get out.
I did it with the help of SR and the support of an old drinking buddy who quit on his own 3 years ago when his wife gave him an ultimatum.
As Least said there are also several people at SR who have done it with just the help of others on this forum so yes it can be done.
I will say that you have to be willing to make some changes in your outlook though and willpower will only help you to get to where you change.
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Old 01-31-2010, 06:09 AM
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Thanks thats good to hear, i can see the absolute value and support the SR,
forums give and clearly help massively in any attempts at giving up booze.
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Old 01-31-2010, 06:46 AM
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although i am one who required help to enable me to be sober, that is not the case for everyone

I'm glad you are here!
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Old 01-31-2010, 07:15 AM
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Don't resist, allow
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Hi Dasha, as you know I found the solution in AA but I am glad you are asking the question. You need a plan if you are going to stay sober this time.

Keep in touch.
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Old 01-31-2010, 07:42 AM
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Um. SR is outside support.


Somebody had to say it.
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Old 01-31-2010, 07:46 AM
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I also did not use AA.

My first couple of years of sobriety was on my own, with the help of books. I found SR after that, and have been here for years now. There is always inspiration here.
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Old 01-31-2010, 07:55 AM
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There is a book, called Sober for Good, (I think!!) that highlights a bunch of different ways that people have gotten, and stayed sober. Real case studies are used, along with interviews and tips from these people. Many of these people did it without outside assistance. They just up and quit and stayed quit.

There are many paths to sobriety. The key is finding what works for you and sticking with it. I think so much of this is a mind set, and understanding and acceptance of what is...the trick is once you find the mind set, holding on to it.

I am not an AA person, but these SR boards have helped me tremendously,and pulled me out of the isolation that goes along with addiction. This is and has been my support group over the past 35 days. I tried this once or twice TOTALLY on my own, and didn't work. This is the longest I've gone without drinking, and SR helps me gain the perspective I need to keep going.

But that's just me and my experience! It's different for everyone.

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Old 01-31-2010, 08:26 AM
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The question is why? Ask yourself why would you want to go against the advice of what the majority are telling you?

I think the key to recovery regardless of what 'method' you use is an absolute honest desire to not want to drink/drug again and then being willing to do whatever is required to make sure that you don't pick that first drink up. An absolute total and utter acceptance of the fact that you are an alcoholic and that the first drink is the drink that kills you is essential imo.
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Old 01-31-2010, 09:00 AM
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When you are ready, you are ready. It what it takes to get you to that point.

I know people who had enough and stopped on their own. I know people who sought out counseling and stayed sober. I look at it now and realize I know people who got sober in just about any number of ways. For me it took a lot to get to "that point". I tried all manner of things and none of them proved effective. Was it that they were not good enough? No, I simply wasn't ready yet. Could these other methods have worked if had been ready? I would like to think so. But that is 20/20 hindsight. It got sober in treatment coupled with AA but, as I said before, I was ready. I can't go back and argue AA and treatment could have been avoided had I been ready earlier in life. It simply took what took and I am grateful for that. I agree with neo on setting conditions as to what will and will not work for me. When you are truly ready, you will do whatever it takes to get and stay sober. It's the sincerity and depth of the willingness, honesty, and openmindedness which can bring forth the realization and make clear the statement: "When the student is ready the teacher will appear".....

Hang in there, don't give up, and regardless of what happens, don't drink!

It will get better................

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Old 01-31-2010, 09:12 AM
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Dearest Dasha:

Oh my friend, IT CAN BE DONE...
It can be done, truly...
I drank from age 16, until April 16th/07 at age 50... & it was with such bitter hatred that I did it, as it had cost me my health & the health/life of my best-friend/hubby April 14th/07...

Please feel free to post or PM any questions
Blessings to you & yours, blessings !

Last edited by Dee74; 01-31-2010 at 01:31 PM. Reason: remove email link
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Old 01-31-2010, 09:15 AM
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After 30 years of daily drinking, I finally decided I'd had enough a year and a half ago. Have enjoyed a sober life since. That being said, I work daily at sobriety. First and foremost, I come to SR. I kinda feel it's like a type of AA of a 'new generation'....for ME, anyway.

So, doing it on my own meant reading lots of different stuff...AA, SMART but really, most of all it was SR.

Like others have said, you have to be ready, and I do mean READY, before anything will work. Good luck to you.
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Old 01-31-2010, 10:02 AM
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Ultimately it is me that decides if I will drink or not. Support, be it a friend, group or program can help me keep my resolve to live drug free. Yet if I make a decision to return to drugging or drinking...I get high.

I believe the internal locus of control describes my view well. Here is an article from SMART Recovery the touches on the subject.
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Old 01-31-2010, 10:21 AM
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I'm glad you asked this because I've been pondering it myself. AA could be helpful to find non-drinking friends, which I need, but I've found, at least in these early stages, that the meetings make me fixate and therefore want to drink. I will go again but am not sure I will be a regular farther down the road.

My dad was an alcoholic - drinking heavily and daily - for years. He quit without any outside help and has been sober for 15 years.
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Old 01-31-2010, 01:01 PM
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Eventually you have to do it yourself.
No one else can stop for you.
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Old 01-31-2010, 01:15 PM
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Yeah, I'm pretty much on my own, aside from this site.

I'm also an atheist, and only a couple of people outside of this internet community know about my problem.

I'm 8 months sober, so I guess it is possible. For me, it took my life falling apart for me to get pissed off enough to say: "If my life doesn't change right now, I don't want to live it anymore."
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Old 01-31-2010, 01:22 PM
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It CAN be done- I'm living proof. AA Didn't do it for me, tough I LEARNED a lot from going to a lot of meetings. You have to reach down somehow & find the "proper motivation". A Spiritual experience, such as I had, doesn't hurt either. Keep searching for an approach that you are able to respond to.
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Old 01-31-2010, 01:34 PM
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I did it dasha - but I had to nearly die to do it, so I'm not sure I recommend my way.

In 25 words or less, the key for me was not willpower, but acceptance - I had to accept I had a problem with alcohol, and I had to accept without reservation that I couldn't drink again.

Support was also vital. good luck mate
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Old 01-31-2010, 01:38 PM
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I know a couple who i used to drink with, one got a job promo in the navy and was given an ultimatum and the other met a nice girl. They both stopped suddenly and, to my knowldge, are not back getting drunk everynight. Both would certainly never be anywhere near coming onto a recovery forum like SR though, they just stopped because the reason for stopping outweighed the benefits of the drinking and nights out. No talk about alcoholism, no googling am i drinking too much, just a couple of guys who thought it was the right time to knock the booze on the head knowing that they liked it too much to have a couple.

Basically they weren't alcoholics, they were heavy drinkers...i also know, not face to face anymore obviously, a few heavy drinkers who have not stopped and would not consider stopping as they are having themselves too much fun...again you would never see them here wondering if they are drinking too much.
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