tallcactus

The dogs were going crazy, (5 furry, loving Chihuahua's) and answered the door. An old friend and drunk, crying, with a sixpack of Budlite. (My DOC)
My first thought, concern. I let her in and start the coffee, 4 me.
I listen and am thinking I don't need this, but I love her as a friend and didn't know that she had a 'problem.' Not only alcohol, but in a very abusive relationship. Long story short, she is sleeping in the guest bedroom and I'm awake without a plan to help her. The sixpack, she put it in the fridge.
Have 2 confess... I thought about drinking the 5 that R in there, but haven't.
Thinking should I just dump what she put in the fridge or drink it...hey, who would know.
Thinking..this is a test, this is good 4 me.
Thinking, I do not need this temptation.
Thinking, about this a## of a partner that she has and what he has put her threw; I'm angry.
This is her beer. I will not drink it. We have a history of drinking together, here at my house. ( I most always did my drinking alone in my home.)
It's quiet, television is on 4 background, awake and worried 4 her. Just covered her up, kinda a cold front here, just turned on the heat.
Just putting it out here, my feeling, her problems, my worries and I know I will not drink. Still sober and will have 90 days tomorrow after my small relapse, after over 5 years of continuous sober time.

stone

Stay strong TC, be a friend, forget the beer.

Dee74

I know you'll do the right thing for you and yr friend, TC.

Way to go on your 90 days, too!
D

TheSunAlsoRises

Hey... good to hear your coming back up to 90 days thats awesome... sorry to hear about this girl... you being there and being sober for her is something she obviously needs... Way to talk about whats going on, I only get in trouble when I try to grit my teeth and say i'm gonna get through this...

Dean62

Well TC you must be doing something right if she is coming to you for help. This is a great opportunity for you to be a great example as a friend to her as well as to us here at SR. Thanks for sharing with us and continue to take care of yourself. Your doing great. :ghug3

PS. You might consider talking to her about tossing the beer in the morning if you think she really does have a problem?

Sikkisirus

Congratulations on your 90 days TC

Throw the beer in the trash, its not doing any good for you or your friend

littlefish

I would get rid of the beer. I can't have alcohol in my house. It took a long time for my husband and older son to get on board with that. It might be good for her to understand that your home is an alcohol free zone. It might give her the same feeling of safety you feel in your home without alcohol.

sandpoint

Cool story and it is happening right now. I bet you will get a lot more from giving care than joining her. She could use your help for sure. Nice story, really. Keep going with what will be best for her and for you....

bananagrrrl

Stay strong TC!

It sounds like you are a very good friend to her.

Horselover

Way to go TC. I am sorry for your friend. Abusive relationship and alcohol problem is pretty sad. You can help her by being a sober friend and I know you know that. Congratulations on the 90 days AND the 5 years. I think you know what to do. Posting here was a good way to show newcomers how the process works for everyone no matter how much time they have. Hope you are getting some rest right now. Check in today when you can.

anono

maybe take the beer out of the fridge so its not cold? then discuss with her getting rid of it when she is up

stay strong...

herennow

Thanks for posting this - what a great description of how this all works (the temptation, self-talk etc...) You are strong (I've read your posts) and I have no doubt that you will do the right thing for both yourself and your friend.
Congrats on the sober time...

traderjane

TC -- You are a good friend. I know you'll pull through this.

ANEWAUGUST

TC-

You are a kind and caring friend.
She obviously felt safe enough to come to you.

I hope she seeks some help for her abusive relationship.

Congrats on the 90 days. You might share with her that you aren't drinking, and would prefer her not to bring her beer over in the future...or not...I am sure the right words will come to you when you are ready.

Five chihuahuas...aw...I miss my little one so badly!

coffeenut

Congrats on your sober time!

I would take the beer out of the fridge...I agree with the previous poster about keeping it warm. Then, I think I'd share with your friend that you are sober, and damn proud of it. Maybe you can give her the push she needs to get sober.

Stay strong. You're right....this is one of those 'tests'.

littlefish

Little reminder here: I never cared if my beer was warm or cold. If it had the alcohol percentage I needed to stave off another hangover, that sufficed for me.

tallcactus

Thank You all 4 the replies.
She stayed here until the evening of last night. She came here, because we are friends and she knew that I was sober. She knows all my past dirty secrets, the lies, etc.
Her plan is to stop drinking. She has the desire and said she would call me, so we can go 2 a AA meeting together today, but first she is getting rid of the BF. She had called him the morning after and told him to pack "his ****," LOL.
All is good today.

Dee74

I'm glad to see you back here, TC

D

Hevyn

TC, I missed this when you first posted it. You gave your friend a safe haven, what a wonderful thing you did. She knew she could count on you to see her through, that's a priceless gift to give to someone. Who knows what might have happened if she hadn't had you to turn to - especially in the condition she was in.

I'm really happy you came here and told us about it. We can usually get through anything if we share it here (I rarely do, but I should). I hope you'll let us know how it's going for her.

thirtybubba

good to hear, tc, sorry i missed this when you posted

you are strong!

tb