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Old 08-15-2009, 01:11 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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I never got much out of N.A. At least where I live. It's like hanging out with a bunch of junkies who don't have any drugs. I didn't witness any real life changing, just not using, and that's not enough. A total change in our addictive thinking is what we need to STAY clean and sober. That's the miracle of working the A.A. twelve steps, with a sponsor. There are plenty of addicts in A.A., especially these days. Find an open minded group, but be vague when sharing in the group setting as far as the drug itself is concerned. Just say, "I really feel like getting loaded today" etc. Then get to know people and find the ones who are addicts above all. My A.A. sponsor is a cocaine addict, but he found through doing the step work that he has all the alcoholic tendencies, and when he drank he drank to get drunk, so when he introduces himself he says, Hi, my name is Aaron, and I'm an alcoholic.
The label doesn't matter. It used to with me. I used to say Hi, I'm Gerry, and I'm an alcoholic and addict. Now I just say I'm an alcoholic and leave it at that. A turd by any other name still smells like a turd. Alcohol is a drug, after all. A sedative hypnotic. Find a cool A.A. group and spend $12.00 on a "Big Book" of alcoholics anonymous, and I highly recomend the Daily Reflections book as well. When you read it, everytime you see the word alcohol replace it with your drug of choice. You will be flabbergasted (thats my word for the day) at how much you will relate to in that literature. Find someone who has abused the same drug you do, so you will relate more comfortably with him (or her, if your a female) who has at least a couple years sober and has worked all twelve steps -that's important, the blind shouldn't lead the blind. And ask them if he or she would sponsor you. Don't walk away dejected if the answer is no. Sometimes members just can't take on anymore newcomers at certain points in time. Ask them to direct you to someone who may be able to help you. Get phone numbers, make friends, share at meetings and stay clean and happy. But if you feel the need to talk about the drug in depth do it on the sidelines or with your sponsor. The drug isn't even important. It's what's compelling you to the drug use that's the issue, and that is what the 12 steps will address. And that's how you will achieve true lasting happy sobriety.
I wish you the best. My ex-wife was a weed addict. The only one I ever knew. I'm not talking heavy smoker, I mean she HAD to have it or she would freak out, and go to any length to get it, or I would have to go to any length to get it for her, for my sanity and her safety. I understand, man.
Your friend, Gerry (gtinney1)
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Old 08-20-2009, 04:40 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
ZM2
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Just checking in to let everyone know I'm still holding strong.

I'll share more when i get some time.

[[[ DAY 11 ]]
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Old 08-21-2009, 10:33 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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Glad you're still with us! This is a great site. I'm really greatful I found it.
Have a good day, with bright hope for tomorrow.
Gerry
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Old 08-24-2009, 07:06 AM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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Day 15

still....







still not using [thank God]


still working out






still living life on lifes terms


still working the steps




still DONT have a sponsor





still ignoring ego [most of the time]
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Old 08-24-2009, 07:02 PM
  # 25 (permalink)  
Not all better, getting better
 
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Good for you!!! Keep at it!! I'm glad you are doing well. Take care.
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Old 09-08-2009, 05:48 AM
  # 26 (permalink)  
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Day 30!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i made it. Couldnt have done it without the help of my fellow recovering addicts and alcoholics. Thank you all.

Me being a recovering "pothead" 30 days also signifies the day in which my system [should] be officially clean.

Yea thats right baby , i can go out and apply for jobs without the fear of failing the drug test. Many of you dont realize how HUGE this is for a guy like me.

I still dont have a sponsor though , but I'll make sure i get one before i start to stray from the mission at hand which is NOT USING.

30 days BABY!!!!!!!!!
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Old 09-08-2009, 05:53 AM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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That's incredibly.... well absolutely WONDERFUL!

Congratulations, ZM2
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Old 09-08-2009, 05:57 AM
  # 28 (permalink)  
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Congratulations! The road to recovery is not always easy or good, but it's always better. Way, way, better!
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Old 09-27-2009, 08:03 PM
  # 29 (permalink)  
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the retread is 49 days clean...just droppin in to show some love
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Old 09-27-2009, 08:08 PM
  # 30 (permalink)  
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good to see you again ZM2

D
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Old 09-27-2009, 09:45 PM
  # 31 (permalink)  
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thanks for your inspirational story ZM2. I'm getting close to 30 days myself and it's always nice to see another person doing so well in early recovery. Stay strong!
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Old 02-22-2010, 07:49 AM
  # 32 (permalink)  
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its been a while since i checked in. Unfortunately i relapsed in Dec 09 and have been back at it every since. Like always it has broken me down.

I'm glad to still have this site to come to. I'm just having a difficult time climbing back on that wagon.
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Old 02-22-2010, 09:36 AM
  # 33 (permalink)  
Don't resist, allow
 
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Welcome back
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Old 02-22-2010, 02:05 PM
  # 34 (permalink)  
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Welcome back ZM2.

I hope coming back here will give you the impetus you need to kickstart your recovery again.

D
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