Day 12 and 'preparing' for relapse
Focus
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Washington DC
Posts: 206
Originally Posted by 1_day@_a_time 
"I'm already planning the 4th......and debating what I will drink with all of that alcohol... free, unlimited alcohol."
Just to give you or anyone else an idea of how your life can change if and when you are ready to stop: on the 4th of July, I will wake up with no hangover, no guilt or remorse about drinking & be very grateful for my life being alcohol free.
I will promptly ask Him to be with me in the moment I'm in and be with me throughout the day & help me with my thinking & though life.
I'll start the day out with some reading & praying, asking Him to be with me, all of my family and all my friends, which include each and everyone of you.
I'll ask for compassion, understanding, flexibility and tolerance. That love & tolerance be my code to others in all cases. If someone bothers me, I'll ask for patience & pause to not get angry, but pray for them, for they may well be emotionally ill and or frequently wrong & a child of God's too.
I'll thank Him I am able to run the trails of our mountians for hours on end, and complete all the endurance events I have come to love so much.
The 4th of July is a special day for me as I pause and show my gratitiude that indeed another year has passed w/o any alcohol or drugs. That my life has completely changed as I continue to recover & grow. That finally I have found a program which teaches me coping skills to live life w/o having to escape. So that I may be at peace emotionally, physically, mentally & spiritually & become happily & usefully whole.
and btw, I am incapable of ANY of this without God, a formal program of recovery (AA), the amazing assistance of a loving sponsor, applying the 12 steps & continuing to learn how to apply spiritual principles in my life, as a way of life.
I really love the 4th of July......
Just to give you or anyone else an idea of how your life can change if and when you are ready to stop: on the 4th of July, I will wake up with no hangover, no guilt or remorse about drinking & be very grateful for my life being alcohol free.
I will promptly ask Him to be with me in the moment I'm in and be with me throughout the day & help me with my thinking & though life.
I'll start the day out with some reading & praying, asking Him to be with me, all of my family and all my friends, which include each and everyone of you.
I'll ask for compassion, understanding, flexibility and tolerance. That love & tolerance be my code to others in all cases. If someone bothers me, I'll ask for patience & pause to not get angry, but pray for them, for they may well be emotionally ill and or frequently wrong & a child of God's too.
I'll thank Him I am able to run the trails of our mountians for hours on end, and complete all the endurance events I have come to love so much.
The 4th of July is a special day for me as I pause and show my gratitiude that indeed another year has passed w/o any alcohol or drugs. That my life has completely changed as I continue to recover & grow. That finally I have found a program which teaches me coping skills to live life w/o having to escape. So that I may be at peace emotionally, physically, mentally & spiritually & become happily & usefully whole.
and btw, I am incapable of ANY of this without God, a formal program of recovery (AA), the amazing assistance of a loving sponsor, applying the 12 steps & continuing to learn how to apply spiritual principles in my life, as a way of life.
I really love the 4th of July......
This is why I could see me really looking up to you
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Location: NY
Posts: 6,608
Originally Posted by effortjoy
Finally brought up my drinking problem with my husband and he said that he noticed that I hadn't had a drink in six months. But he didn't say anything because he figured I just wanted to stop without his interference. I have only been sober for 12 days. For the past six months I have been 'drunk' almost every day! I feel guilty that I didn't correct him. But then I started thinking...if I hid it that well then maybe just for the vacation this week I will drink and then I'll stop when we come home..I am already thinking about stocking up on my favorites so i can bring them to the hotel with me..just in case I really need them..I know that I won't drink before vacation but I am "planning" my relapse even though I don't want to be a drinker again. Don't know what to do; can't even start packing the suitcases without making my list of drinking essentials. How will I relax without alcohol?
Believe me when I say I have had to do this myself lately. Okay I won't drink for today. I wake up and I repeat that.
Repeat after me, "I will not entertain the thought of drinking on vacation." Enjoy your vacation and stop wearing yourself out on these needless thoughts. Hugs - Sarah
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 237
If this vacation is something you can't do w/o booze then I think you shouldn't go on vacation as it must be something you don't want to do that's why you need booze to get through it.
Do you have to go? If you need to drink to get through it, doesnt sound like much fun. It sounds like a whirlwind of chaos. Why not, instead of involving yourself (half drunk) in the chaos, just take a step out and relax, maybe with a book (sober) outside of the chaos. You may actually enjoy yourself.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Virginia
Posts: 187
I'm a pretty "new" sober man,,,,,but I can say that "I did it"! For a long-term drinker, I can tell you that you will have to fight some demons for a while when you quit for good. Bite the bullet, quit, fight those demons for a couple of months or so, and be rid of the drink....You can do it. I did it, and feel pretty darn good now!
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