Good Morning
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 333
Good Morning
Just to check in and say I'm on a new day 2, and looking hard at the way forward. I really really don't want go the AA route and there are no alternatives here. Should I risk trying it on my own again? That lasted around four months - do i have the strength? Questions questions! 
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 4,682
Each to their own, i personally wasted years trying to do it on my own and since sobering up now realise that even in the times that i did not drink it was still ruling my life completely even though i thought it was not. If not AA why don't you go to a counseller who has experience in alcholics, i found one and she is great. I said it in another post i am firm believer that if i could have done it by myself i would have done it years ago.
good luck and keep coming to SR too:-)
good luck and keep coming to SR too:-)
Resident
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Toronto, Ontario
Posts: 4,150
Good morning Cool. I am new to quitting( around 3 weeks) so I can't really answer the one about doing it on your own.
I do know there are several people around here that have had continued success using this forum as their main support. Hopefully some of them will chime in and give you some advice.
I am trying to go it alone, so to speak, and I come here every day and read all the posts and post a lot myself and this alone has kept me on the straight and narrow so far. It is great that you don't quit quitting and the 4 months you have isn't lost.
This forum keeps me grounded by being around like minded people.
I do know there are several people around here that have had continued success using this forum as their main support. Hopefully some of them will chime in and give you some advice.
I am trying to go it alone, so to speak, and I come here every day and read all the posts and post a lot myself and this alone has kept me on the straight and narrow so far. It is great that you don't quit quitting and the 4 months you have isn't lost.
This forum keeps me grounded by being around like minded people.
perpetual optimist
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Montana
Posts: 2,959
Hi CoolMummy,
I have to agree with Yeah, maybe find a good counselor to talk to face to face. This place is a great support tool, you can vent, read and find friends. The common thread is we have all been on day one.......sometimes again and again. But we don't judge, we come back here to open arms. This group is the best. I hope you stay around. Take care of you!
I have to agree with Yeah, maybe find a good counselor to talk to face to face. This place is a great support tool, you can vent, read and find friends. The common thread is we have all been on day one.......sometimes again and again. But we don't judge, we come back here to open arms. This group is the best. I hope you stay around. Take care of you!
Attitude of Gratitude
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Dayton, Ohio
Posts: 2,305
WELCOME TO SR COOLMUMMY!
I can't quite figure out why some people have such an aversion to AA. . . I feel it's one of the main reasons that I am alive today. I tried things my way for 25 years after I realized I had a problem and sure, I had some periods of time when I wasn't using but I was just on what I call a dry drunk. By that I mean that I still had all of the same negative, self destructive behaviors. Each time I went back out because I was so damn unhappy. It was worse than when I was drinking and using because there never was that time where I mentally escaped from my agony.
I had went to AA and NA meetings (I'm also an addict) during my dry/clean times but I didn't work any kind of Program of Recovery. The 12 Steps are where I was able to own that I have a problem, that I am powerless over it, that my Higher Power, whom I call God is there and always has been. I then had to look at the things that got me to the point when I walked into the rooms and asked for help. Sure, it's hard to open up old wounds so to speak but this was necessary to let go of them. Some people say that they were dragging around a sack of crap filled with the pain of their past, I felt like mine was an industrial sized dumpster. But by working the Steps, I was able to clean out the garbage of my past. This was the most freeing experience to be able to let go of these things that caused me to pick up in the first place. I was then able to let go of resentments that I had been carrying with me for many years. Funny thing is, when it came down to it, I couldn't even really remember why I was so angry or hurt in the first place. I was able to apologize to people who I had hurt which was like the weight of the world being lifted off of me. I then learned how to live my life on life's terms. This is just a basic summary of how I perceive working the Steps. . . in my words.
I also went to a counselor who specializes in drug and alcohol addiction and that has been so helpful too. I still go, even though I have been in Recovery for 3 1/2 years. After all, life still throws me curve balls. Just because I'm not using that doesn't mean problems and situations don't arise.
I hope you will find what is best for you. I hope you will at least try some Meetings before you write them off. Go to several different ones. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised at the amount of compassion, friendship, support and understanding that you will find there. For me, there was nothing more comforting than being in a room full of people who shared the same problems I do. . . helped me to realize that I am not a horrible person. I just have a horrible disease.
Stick around and keep reading and posting. I tend to get very wordy, but after all, this is my life and what a wonderful life it has become.
God Bless,
Judy
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: MN
Posts: 528
I don't have experience with AA, except that I have a brother in law that did it for a couple years. He said he liked it. I have talked to him about what its like, what they talk about, etc. I just don't really feel comfortable going right now. But thats just me. I found having this site is a great help & the friends I have made here help keep me going.
Maybe try AA before you dismiss it. Its different for everyone.
Good Luck!
Maybe try AA before you dismiss it. Its different for everyone.
Good Luck!
Forum Leader
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Scottsdale, AZ, one big happy dysfunctional family!
Posts: 23,056
Good morning and welcome back CM, hope you continue to reach out for support.
I tried many times for years to "do it on my own" and never stayed sober for more than a few days at a time. That's not really sobriety, it's just being in between drinks. AA works for me, it started with a commitment to never take a drink again, no matter what happened. Abstinence, and the rest followed the longer I was in the program.
I'm not an expert on what does and doesn't work, I feel it's up to the individual to discover and decide what will work. Something, anything, as long as it's a long-term plan for recovery.
I tried many times for years to "do it on my own" and never stayed sober for more than a few days at a time. That's not really sobriety, it's just being in between drinks. AA works for me, it started with a commitment to never take a drink again, no matter what happened. Abstinence, and the rest followed the longer I was in the program.
I'm not an expert on what does and doesn't work, I feel it's up to the individual to discover and decide what will work. Something, anything, as long as it's a long-term plan for recovery.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: New Hampshire
Posts: 396
I said the same thing! I would never go to AA, so don't even bring it up to me. It wasn't for me. I tried on my own for so long that a week ago I decided that day I was going to a meeting. I wanted to sit in the back and not say anything. They were very nice about it. So now I'm on the AA wagon, and trying not to say it to people who don't want to hear it. As you can see, I'm not very good at keeeping my mouth shut.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 5,068
Originally Posted by Coolmummy 
It'snot that I'm 'dismissing' it as such, I just don't feel that it would be the right thing for me!
I go to AA, its not perfect but I wouldn't be sober today without it. Every group has its own personality, it took me some time to find the one I fit in with.
But best of luck and however you do it, stay sober.
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