ElChupacabra

Well, at the time I had drunk behind her back and kept it from her. When she found out she was deeply upset at the deceit and breach of trust so she basically decided to leave me. I had to talk her around to staying with me and the price of that was an ultimatum to give up booze altogether until Christmas otherwise she'll walk. She hasn't given me a complete booze ban after christmas. I'm still allowed to drink on special occasions, but I'm limited to three drinks even then. But it wasn't the ultimatum that had any effect on me. It was the that that she had already left me beforehand that had the effect.

Basically it was the prospect of living with the notion that I had screwed up a potential marriage because the short term enjoyment of drinking was more important. I consider myself better than that so I did what I thought was necessary to preserve my dignity.

jennygirl73

Chupacabra,

You should be so proud of yourself for making that decision. I know that I am proud of you! Thank you so much for your insight. I think this will help us a lot. It also helps me realize that we both need help. Thank you so so much. And good luck with your progress. I really am proud of you.

jennygirl73

I am going to my first al-anon meeting today at noon. Wish me luck! I am scared to death, but if I want change in my life, I think this is the first step.