Jules62

You don't suck Bam.Addiction does.

Glad you're still here.Keep going.We're with you,

Julesxox

littlefish

I know what you mean: I relapsed last week. I think the best thing is to avoid beating yourself up about it, that is just counterproductive. Try to learn from it.

I learned a lot from my relapse. I found out some things about myself. What built up to the relapse was frustration with a new job and the feeling that I couldn't do anything to fix the problem.
I kept it all building up inside till I was miserable, exhausted and physically sick. And I didn't talk to ANYONE about the problem! Right there is where I went wrong: I have a fellowship here, and a fellowship with AA and I (could have requested) counseling at my treatment center but I kept my feelings to myself until I felt like a spec of dirt on the floor.

Then I reached for the bottle.

Next time I have a problem I will talk to someone about it!!!!!!

BeamMeUpScotty

We're all human. If it weren't for our mistakes we wouldn't appreciate our successes. Don't beat yourself up as the past is done, today is here, and tomorrow is on the way.

Tazman53

Bam as long as one stands up more times then they fall, they are a winner.

You coming clean is honesty, that was the one thing that got me started on the path to sobriety, being honest first with myself and then others, as long as yuo stay honest you stand a chance.

Bamboozle

Wow...everyone...


Thank you.






Ah, the job...the job I probably didn't quit soon enough. I saw the problem coming, it was building up...but, I didn't do something about it until it started erupting. Typical for me...

I don't know, it was like the perfect crap storm. I made it a point not to drink until after I was done at my job. Yeah, you read that right.

I need professional help. I don't think I'm strong enough to wait it out a few months sober to see if I get any better. I almost always drank to self-medicate. I have terrible coping skills. What to do when the medicine's gone?

I haven't been able to talk myself up now for about a month. Don't worry people. I'm not really in the depths of despair...it's kind of weird...I feel somewhat numb...and bland...and not very hopeful. I can joke around and laugh if I want...but I'm not where I want or need to be at all.

Pelican

Hey Bam!

I hope this is an upper for you today:

You have been a tremendous inspiration to me in my becoming sober. I am sure there are other newbies on SR and some still lurking that have received hope and inspiration from you. Your honesty here and now continues to be helpful to us and yourself.

I think your sharing and talking about this is revealing:
I hope you will share your struggles and solutions with all of us as we travel this road together.

Positive thoughts and energy to you!

Ananda

Bam what you just shared made total sense to me...yep get some help now before it does get bad...Glad to see newcomers letting you know how important your posting is for them...its important for us farther down the path as well....:ghug

Horselover

Hey Bam - have you ever dealt with depression in your past? I ask because when you say you feel numb and kind of bland, it could be a sign. It probably is temporary if it is, but I would get a professional opinion as you stated. You are worth it Bam! I know the self medicating thing and I think a lot of do or did this, but that's the part about sobering up. We have to find other ways to deal with life and I am definitely a work in progress on this concept. Still hoping you find what you need Bam. :ghug3

dancinggirl

Sweetie, so sorry you slipped, but SO CONVINCED you can do this!!! Thinking of you today!

TryingSoHard

Hi Bam,

I just wanted to say that I don't think you suck, and I'm glad you're here. Being honest is HARD so good for you.

*hugs*

IO Storm

You were honest. You got up. You have the right attitude.

Now go for it again, Bam!

:ghug3:

Lenina

Bam,

You slipped. You 'fessed up. So, you start over with some more knowledge about alcoholism. I'm glad you're back!

Love,

Lenina