Hope

I feel very frustrated today. I'm having academic problems. I am in a financial hole and I'm facing legal problems... and that is causing problems with my family. I feel like I can't clean up these messes I made. I'm sober today but I just feel like curling up in a ball and crying. I'm so discouraged.

Golfman

Hey, hey, hey!!!! I know exactly how you feel. You are definitely not alone. Sometimes I still feel like a little boy who wants to take his blanket, such his thumb in the corner, and hope that someone will come along and tell me everything's going to be alright.

Go ahead and cry, it will probably help. Get it all out, give yourself plenty of time to move through this. When I was in this kind of situation, so many thoughts running around in my head, someone who cared about me said..."slow down, breathe, and write eveything down that's overwhelming you." That way your list will be on paper, not in your head. Once it's on paper it becomes a plan of action. And remember, you can only do one thing at a time. So...do the first thing on the list.

Your friend in Sobriety,
Ed

Done_With_It

I feel like I can't clean up these messes I made.>>>>
Hope those aren't feelings, those are thoughts. You can change your thoughts.

Take it one step at a time. Try writing some of this stuff down maybe, and some solutions, instead of letting all of this come down on you at once.
It's overwhelming you, break it down...
You are in a financial hole, that is going to take time...
Legal problems.... if you write them down, it will help you come up
with solutions...
Your family and you have always had problems on and off again.
It's time to worry about you, and let them take care of themselves...

Change your thoughts to I can do this, I can find the solutions....
They will come to you.....

Aysha

I'm right with you too. I worked hard to get my credit back over the past few years had a good credit score going on. But I started going wild in Oct. of last year and now I am so far in debt with that and medical bills. I lost it all in a matter of a couple months what took a few years to get back.
I want crawl in a hole and hide sometimes.
You have more than I do to think about but I feel like that too.
Your clean and sober tho. And it feels like it just isnt worth the effort to try and make it right sometimes. But you know..All things take time.
Family can be tough to deal with.
You'll be ok. That stuff is peanuts compared to making your recovery happen.
That takes courage, strength and comittment.
This too will all come together somehow.
I hope you feel better hun.

Surlyredhead

Don't give up H4L, I was in your position a few 24 hrs ago. I had two warrants out for my arrest, my credit (which used to be perfect) was ruined, and my family had all but disowned me. I cried a lot during that time...and yes, it helped to get it out. Much like everyone is saying, I had to take a deep breath and start at the beginning to correct the wreckage I had made for myself. I had to deal with things in a matter of importance. I knew that the only cure for my family problems was time. I had to continue to show them that I was really trying to stay sober and become respectable and responsible...I was messing up for a long time and it would take time for that relationship to rebuild. I went to court and took care of my warrants and made arrangements for payment.....the court was more concerned about the fact that I was not drinking and I was making an effort to repay what I owed them. After consulting with a credit counsler, I decided to declare bankruptcy. My credit was not all my spending, my ex-husband helped, but everything was in my name...and I take responsibility for most of it.
It has been a difficult and long process, no one wanted to give me credit (can you blame them) but eventually things began to get better and it has been over 10 years since I declared bankruptcy. My family loves and trusts me again, they even told me they are proud of me and that makes me cry. My dealing with the courts have been long over....and today, I am a responsible and respectful member of society.

I am telling you this, so that you know that you are not going through anything alone. I want to let you know that when we become sober.....for the long haul...there are things we will need to take care of...and these things take time and effort. They can only get better if we work at correcting the mistakes we made using......and it is okay to cry, a lot, if it helps....crying is better than drinking. You will be fine...just DO NOT drink.

Big hugs to you....Cathy

Missymae737

Hope4,

I needed to read your thread today. I too have been struggling with a mess I made, when I was drinking and drugging.

What helped me is I grabbed on to any accomplishment, small or large, and believed there is hope. Things may not come as quickly as I would like, but as long as I stay sober I can have my life back...

Thinking of you....

hope3

Hi hope4life, I am so sorry you are having such

a difficult time. This may sound harsh, but money and things

can be replaced, we can't. You are still here, your family is still here,

we can't go back and change the past, all we can do is learn by it...

I hope tommorrow brings you more hope, and less sorrows, you are

in my prayers, hope3

Luckyv2

Right now we need to just focus on right now....a guy told me one time he said "Vic what can you do about this situation right now?" If you can't do anything then let it go and when the time is right...things take care of themselves. We don't have to be in control today... I better practice that one a little more

CarolD

Prayers and Hugs coming your way.

nogard

Cheryl, I love what Vic said and like me and Vic you are among the originals when I arrived here and I know you can do this - keep talking and take it one baby step at a time.

Thinking of you and praying with you.

Kevin

Hope

I feel better after reading all these posts! I don't feel so alone right now.
Thanks you guys. I'm grateful for all of you right now.

And hey, look what I found!!! -

Hope

I cried for a few hours earlier. I think I just needed to let it out. I'm taking baby steps.

I also just got a letter for medical bills stating that they are about to turn it over to a collection agency. I can't pay all of this right now.

As I am told, I have to just focus on staying sober right now. Everything else will start to fall into place. Without sobriety, I won't have anything.

I had a few thougths of going get a fifth of liquor and getting drunk but I'm ignoring that thought. That is what has gotten me in this mess to start with!!

I am taking a leap of faith and hoping that things will work out.

nogard

they will if you don't pick chetyl

You can arrange to pay opff the bills.

Kevin

hope3

Hi cheryl, I'm glad you are able to focus on the

most important thing right now, your health

and sobriety... Just wanted to say hi today and let you

know I'm thinking of you, hugs, hope3

ayla zaire

everyone has given such good advise to you........the only thing i can add is to keep reaching out for support........and vic is right, one day at a time.....and try not to worry about the things you can't deal with now......you have the future to deal with those problems........i hope today is a better day...love your sig........

hugs and love
ayla

Done_With_It

Cheryl, I have so many medical bills in collection, even been sued, you just do what you can. You can always make it through it. One step at a time.
And they are always willing to work with you.