PlanoTexican

The only reason you are keeping it is at some point you are going to believe you have it under control and can be just a casual user.

If that were true why did you quit in the first place?

StrongR2Day

Huh, you just told on yourself.

Now you either have to listen to the good people here, and get rid of it. Or you can say "I know better" and hold on to it. In which case, if you eventually use it (and odds are pretty good you will), you'll say "I should have listened to you". That is, if you make it back to recovery.

So, save us from having to say "told you so", save yourself a whole lot of grief, and dump it. Stat.

djfriedm

I really would get rid of it. You're only setting yourself up to use again. You're not excercizing control by having it there.

Sugah

If I had control, quitting wouldn't have been necessary.

Peace & Love,
Sugah

Hope

Actually, the addiction is in control because it has you believing that it is okay to have it there. Addiction is sneaky like that. It wants you to believe you are in control.

Luckyv2

You are lucky at least Chy slapped you

SadCircle

It's a comfort thing. My dad has been sober for twenty years.. and hes always kept a bottle of wine for guests and or girlfriends.. Maybe after the two year mark it would be a better idea.

dalin

if he ever worked a REAL FIRST STEP, not that fill in the blank guide,and truly wanted to stay clean,it would no longer be there.
not being critical.......but being real.
my recovery follows my actions,not just the step work paperwork.
it is called a reservation.
get real with yourself
and your sponsor

Humbled 1

"Denial isn't a river..."

Nevyn

Thanks everyone. Rose was right, I certainly would not have let on to a single soul that I still had it if I had not really wanted someone to help me toss it. So, I told my sponsor and he came over and we solemnly did the deed. I can't say I feel good about it. Actually it is gnawing on my insides and now I want to go get more. I won't though. I am committed. And I am still working on a complete and honest first step.

Dreamz

Good for you for doing that - hang in there - just take it day by day!!!

djfriedm

Good for you for doing that. Keep working it!

Sugah

You got rid of the material part of the reservation. Now, with your HP's help, you can rid yourself of the mental reservation. Take a deep breath....now, pray! I'll even pray with you....

Peace & Love,
Sugah

2dayzmuse

I'm glad you got rid of it. I think it is the right thing to do. I had to wonder if hanging on to it was a test, or a convenience? I liken hanging on to a stash while trying to quit to hanging on to the bullets for the firing squad of your own execution, or tying the knot in the noose of your own hanging. Eventually, it is going to get you. Why assist in your own demise?

Luckyv2

Did the Russian Roulette game play any part in that as well? I just had to let some people really see that this isn't a game. I always thought that it was, but of course I was so far into denial. Glad that you are feeling better and glad that you choose life today.

Love Vic

Newf Stimpson

Way to go Nevyn. I believe you made the right choice. I know for me I can't keep any booze or dope in my house. I tried what you were doing several times and I relapsed hard each and every time.

Cheers
Newf

REZ

The first thing I did when I got clean was got rid of all my drugs and paraphanalia. True, if I really wanted to use again, I would do it, regardless of how hard drugs are to get. But it is a lot easier to use again if I have a stash ready to raid. If I have to go get the drugs, I might actually have time to think it through and stop myself before using (maybe call my sponsor, etc.) If the stash is right there, I could use again before I even have a chance to talk myself out of it. It's like having a loaded gun in the house: I'm more likely to shoot someone or myself if I keep a loaded gun around. So get rid of the stash! There is no good reason to keep it around. It is just your addiction playing stupid games with your mind.

Nevyn

Yeah it did. I needed several slaps upside the head and that sure did it after the first one from Chy. Subtlety does not work on me, just ask my wife.

Thanks a million everyone.