New here, but not to this heartache
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Indianapolis, Indiana
Posts: 13
New here, but not to this heartache
This is probably my sixth time to try and get off of vicodin. I last two weeks being "clean" and I always give in to the craving whether its from actual pain or depression or anxiety. The withdrawls are killing me and get worse every time. Each time I say I am never doing this S**t again and two weeks later I am desperate to get to the pharmicist. It's like I don't remember how much pain I went through to feel decent.
I have never told anyone that I abuse them and take more than needed. I could never tell my husband although I feel like I need his help. He is so Mr. Goody and has never been addicted to anything in his life and I just don't think he would understand. I feel like I need support and not chastised.
My real worry is that the meds and dependency are ruining my relationship with everyone that I care most about, especially my beautiful daughter who is 14 and who I love more than anything in this world. I do not want her to ever find out about my problem but my mood swings are so apperant and I have no energy to ever do anything with her.
My job is impossible to do while going through withdrawl. This is the umpteenth time I have had to call in "sick". I don't want to lose my job.
I am going to post on the site that is specific for this as there seems to be some helpful folks over there.
Thanks for listening.
I have never told anyone that I abuse them and take more than needed. I could never tell my husband although I feel like I need his help. He is so Mr. Goody and has never been addicted to anything in his life and I just don't think he would understand. I feel like I need support and not chastised.
My real worry is that the meds and dependency are ruining my relationship with everyone that I care most about, especially my beautiful daughter who is 14 and who I love more than anything in this world. I do not want her to ever find out about my problem but my mood swings are so apperant and I have no energy to ever do anything with her.
My job is impossible to do while going through withdrawl. This is the umpteenth time I have had to call in "sick". I don't want to lose my job.
I am going to post on the site that is specific for this as there seems to be some helpful folks over there.
Thanks for listening.
Starting a New Life
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Greensboro, NC
Posts: 104
You CAN beat this! I have faith in you. Have you thought about trying to go to meetings where you are? Have you talked to anyone about that? I think that it would be a really good idea and it really does help all parts of life.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Indianapolis, Indiana
Posts: 13
I have thought about meetings. I am still so ashamed about anyone knowing. My fear is that I am so mentally beat up that I know that I will break down and become emotional in front of everyone. I HATE that. But I will consider because I really don't think I can do this by myself anymore.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,513
Hi and Welcome,
I know shame and guilt were a huge part of addiction for me. In fact, that ended up being a stumbling block for me many times, because the shame would push me back to drinking.
There is lots of support here, so take a look around and get to know us.
I know shame and guilt were a huge part of addiction for me. In fact, that ended up being a stumbling block for me many times, because the shame would push me back to drinking.
There is lots of support here, so take a look around and get to know us.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
