Lastbinge

Whoopee, I'm getting ready to go mow the lawn.

c'est la vie

We've already turned our heat on a couple times. Now that the kids are back to school it's getting hot during the day again. Poor kids. oh well

I'm so glad we entertained you Sharon.

OnceNice

Whoopie I'm getting ready to go into my bosses office.'

I hope he bosses me around. I'll be thinking about winging the paper weight at his head.

Cindi R

Thanks for asking Sharon...
I wish I could say that I was cleaning carpets or doing something productive...
I worked last night and I learned that my first sponsor died yesterday...
I'm very sad & upset...
I'm not going to use over it.
I know that she gave me a lot of good stuff and I'll miss her.
Her name was Terry and she gave me the gift of the ability to write a gratitude list when I was having a pity party...
She also made me memorize the Third Step Prayer:
"God I offer myself to Thee-to build with me and do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self so that I may better do Thy will. Take away my dificulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always!"
Please pray for her children Troy,18 and Ashley,15 who must be devastated at this point...
I am struggling...
I've lost a lot of people in the last year or so...
I need the program-but there's the whole confidentiality issues cause I'm a nurse...
I also lost a sponsee a little over a year ago...
not feeling like I can help anyone very much....
Going into self preservation mode...
"I can only take care of me dang it"
Putting up the wall...
Isolating...
becomming a "workaholic"...
Another thing Terry told me was "Never go into your head without a flashlight and a friend...it's a very dark and scary place alone"....
Recently ended a long term relationship.....
like this week, cause it just wasn't ever going to be what I wanted to be...
I wanna date, too!!!
and to that, Terry would say, "Do you need to do another 4th step about this?"
and "Check your motives!"

She lives on...
inside my head, forever...
Thanks, Terry H.
I'll keep on doing the next right thing.
I love you!

aasharon90

djfriedm...hunnybee... : ) You guys are sooo young.....hurray for the young at heart...lol After 24 yrs marriage...i still call my husband "baby" and a few other things under my breath...lol...ok i slapped my hand....: ) Be Nice Sharon...lol

Cheryl....its about 89 right now and this is with a cool front that came thru....sould be nice tonight tho.....from looking at the extended forcast....we're slowly decending in tempts...instead of being 95 to 98 we're dropping to 92...lol *****ooo...lol FALLS IN THE AIR...lol Time to break out the sweaters... NOT...! lol

Lastbinge...man i remember the days i use to mow the lawn...edge and weed eat....blow stuff off the side walk...wash the windows....want me to go on...lol However....NOT ANY MORE...every 2 weeks we have these people to come cut our grass....down here in Texas we have lots of men from Mexico who can indure that kind of heat. So what took me 4 to 6 hours every week to do on my own....2 or 3 can do all that in 15 to 30 minutes....DARN they are fast...lol

Im sure ur lawn looks nice and how about that fresh cut grass smell...lol sniff sniff.....hey before u know it it will be too cold to cut grass...lol right? In FLORIDA... : )

ONCENICE....what happened to be called to the office? We're u like me? My ASM wanted me to go pick up carts in the parking lot one day when it was just beginning to rain....so i didnt hop on the job right away...she put on a poncho..went out herself for a minute to get it a little wet then ran to the office to tell on me....OH NOOOOO.....lol so i was called into the office and had a talk with the Assistant Boss....i like him..think hes cute...lol and so to sit there and try to be serious when all i want to do is flirt...lol That was difficult..but i tried and i listened to him tell me that he didnt want to see me in the office again because i can get my walking papers for insebordination(SP) thats when someone tells u to do something and u dont do it....that was a new word for me....anyway i was suppose to sign something but never did...WHEW..!

Hope u were behaving urself...lol

aasharon90

cindi r....I just posted a new thread this morning title Turning Your Will and Life Over...It's the 3rd Step Prayer. Coincidence? Anyway...Im sorry to hear about ur first sponsor passing away. My sponsor is still in Baton Rouge and even tho we r miles apart and I dont speak to her often....she is still very much apart of my sobriety. She will always be someone that became a huge influence on me in my recovery. All the things she suggested to me, all her actions..they all spoke volumes to me. She is such an inspiration to me and as far as im concern she will never be replaced.

Im so glad that u were touched by someone so special. She will always live within u thru ur own action. She seems to have taught u well. Now u will be able to pass on her teaching to someone newer in recovery than u. Just u being here and sharing is much appreciated and a wonderful inspirtation.

Sponcees will come and go...there will be someone that will carry ur torch as time goes on....even if it is one person that u inspire than that is a HUGE accomplishment....so dont give up...U have a lot to offer a new person....ur ESH...experience, strength and hope to stay clean and sober one day at a time and following a program of recovery.

Im glad ur here and dont stop sharing.

Cindi R

Thanks...
My other sponsee just called...outta the blue...I havent heard from her in a couple of months...
she's been doing well. Got her son back and is planning on going back to school.
OH...and I'm making myself do dishes & laundry that have been piling up...

aasharon90

If u can get one of those 2 things done anytime before u go to bed tonight, then thats a big accomplishment. : ) Glad u heard from ur little pigeon. Sounds like ur in a good place right now.

2dayzmuse

(((c'est la vie)))

I can see growth in you and your recovery.

(((Cindy)))

I'm sorry about your losses. I know this must be very difficult for you. Prayers for you and the families who have suffered the loss of a loved one.

I missed another day of work. I have been missing a lot lately. I'm starting to feel guilty and I'm afraid people are going to start looking at me sideways. I know it looks bad, but I really can't help it. Missing a Thursday at work makes for a very convenient four day weekend for me. I assure everyone, it is not done purposefully.

I suffer from GERD. Gastroesophageal Reflux Disease. I haven't been officially diagnosed with tests, but this is something my Dr. and I discussed long ago and I have all of the symptoms. I have pretty much been described every acid reducer you can think of.

Certain foods, coffee, and after eating a meal, or on an empty stomach the acids starts churning. I always have a horse, raspy voice, sore throat and heartburn during a flare up. Early evenings I get really sick to my stomach and usually end up being sick. The acid sets off the gag reflex and it gets pretty icky at times. I hate it. I never know when it is going to hit. So far I have been pretty lucky and have not suffered any embarrassing public moments, but have come awful close. When it hits, it hits with a vengeance.

The first thing I did this morning when I get up is start throwing up. I know it is the GERD thing. It can last for hours on end. I made the decision to not go into work today. Instead of being able to get ready for work, I had a gagathon in its place. I'm not driving 40 minutes into a 10 hr. shift, not knowing if this is going to be how I spend my day.

I have plenty of sick time, it is legitimate, but I still worry about letting my co-workers down. I doubt myself wondering if I am sick enough to stay home or not? It is part of my self-doubt and insecurities kicking in. Also being an alcoholic, all the missed work I associate with negative connotations, the hangover thing. To me, missing work is associated with self inflicted reasons. Even though it may be legitimate, I'm afraid people are going to assume otherwise.

So what do I do? I can go to the Dr. and have tests done to confirm that I suffering from this. I would have to swallow the scope. No thanks. Not only am I passing on a lovely opportunity/experience, I also am passing on the extra expense that my insurance co. won't cover. I can not afford it. I than can be prescribed acid reducers. I have already gone through this and my insurance company refuses to cover them. They said I can purchase the same meds over the counter. So, I wait and hope it will pass. I go through flare ups and then periods of relief.

I need to watch my coffee intake. Caffeine really causes a problem. I need my coffee though. It is really tough though. I also have noticed that sugar has been making me sick lately. I need to cut back on that.

So there it is. That is what I am going through today. It is unpleasant and kinda gross. Not in a projectile kinda way, but in a noisy, vocal kinda way. If you know what I mean? I can reach some pretty interesting octives. I guess it is one of those things you learn to live with. At least I no longer am drinking. Man oh man. I really suffered when I was drinking. The worse case scenario is the acid can eat away at your esophagus over time and can cause throat cancer. No need to dwell on that now. I'm feeling pretty good at this time. That is what makes me feel guilty. I miss work than end up feeling fine. Who knew?

aasharon90

Hi muse...thank u for sharing ur day with me and others. A co-worker and I were goofing off at work today and she mention something about wanting to go home early because she was conjested. We laughed saying the same thing u said about as soon as she would step foot out the door of work she'd begin to feel better....it's just being inside work is what kills ya....lol she's the cashier and im the bagger. We have soo much time to kill in between customers....lol Anyway.....

I know that burning in the throat and stomach cant be comfortable...did u ever try that little purple pill Nexium....? I think it takes time for the esphogus to heal ....

Anyway....as far as the coffee goes...many have had to give up coffee for health related issues...me i was told to get off it several yrs ago because i had found a lump in my br****..... it scared me enough to take my doctors advice....the lump was a cyst and was lanced and drained....i have to be careful of coffee and chocolate because they r stimulants....

Once u ween urself off coffee u will begin to feel sooooo much better...u wil be able to tell a difference in how u feel and ur mood.

I guess all in moderation...right?

Well i do hope u get to feeling better. And it does get better the long you stay sober and others clean. Honest.

Cindi R

****{2daysMuse}}}
Tummy trouble...
I suffer from IBS...
I also don't wanna go through the tests...for all the same reasons...
Although I do know that they give you good drugs so that you don't remember most of it.
But you're right about the cost of the meds & ect...
I, too have not been able to give up the coffee...
with sugar & cream...
off to do another 12 hr night shift...gave a good night ladies and gents if there are any...

2dayzmuse

Thanks guys. Yeah Cindy, stomach issues, blech. I've had problems every since I was a kid.

Sharon, I've had the purple pill, the pink pill, the blue pill, the you name it, I've tried it. Nothing seems to work at times. Things do need time to heal.

The coffee, I don't drink much of it. I had one cup today, but in this instance, one cup may be to much. Like anything else, when things get bad enough, I'm forced to see things for what they are and make changes. Sometimes I'm a slow learner...

scootinbabe

aasharon--this was a nice thread. it's end of day here so not much is going on anymore with me...i'm beat. my biggest adventure was taking three young kids to the grocery store at the end of the day when we were all tired and cranky. two hours, 1 lemonade, loads of items, 89 threats of near-death to my children (from me), and almost $300 later, I was near death myself. i absolutely do not know how i will be able to feed them all when they become teenagers. just the lugging of groceries alone is wearing me down. think i should get me a farm and train them to work the land? we could all go on raw food diets or get some cooking hints from oncenice Rose ;-)

anyhow, i need a meeting. i really do. i was all of h.a.l.t. tonight.

hugs to all! keep on keeping on!

bob123

eating a cinamon bagel watching Telletubbies with bob junior..

Krys_wyo

Oh i dont miss teletubbies......lol going to work out this morning then buying new smoke alarms and fire checking our house, went to a seminar on fires last night and came home to realize how unsafe our house is and we have no plan and 1 smoke alarm.

RubyT

Today I will pray for Krys that my Dad, the retired fireman NEVER gets on this site and reads her post. LOL! Every time he stops by for a visit, my smoke alarms get checked. And my candles blown out! God love him...he makes me nuts!

aasharon90

Hello and good morning ladies....im about to run out to the grocery store. I still want to reply to ur posts when i return...so keep writing....lol maybe ill spot something exciting while im out and about to come back and write about...do u ladies need me to pick u up anything from the store? chips, sodas, ladies home journal...lol ok ill be back soon. Love ya.

RubyT

Thanks for asking, Sharon. Could you pick me up a quart of motivation? And if you have time, stop by the bank to see if they're giving out free samples today. : )

Arura

Ive just got home from work...doing an old ladys garden...As thats my job...! I love it aswell...! the best bit is when i walk away and see the look on their faces...: ). Always a big smile and a thank you...!
I dont get paid much ...but im not out to become a millioner...?????
I do it because I like it and i can give something back...In my own way...!

Im beat...! Love the thread ((Sharon))...Ermmmm....??? some cool Lemonade and some selfconfidance...please...!!! Do they sell new seratonin in the US...?
some more of that would help for sure...!

Great to read what your ALL up to...!

Well thats me... mud gets everywhere...!

aasharon90

Hey Bob glad u could join us....now we need more dads or guys to pop in to let us know what they r up to day...we know you too work hard like us...When im at the grocery store from 8am to 2pm i dont see many dads are men as i would with the moms or women. But they do pop in. Its a nice treat for the ladies. : ) Anyway...we do have some dads that come in with their kids as they do the shopping for their wives. Then the single bachlors guys they too need to eat. Some u can tell really love to eat or cook and just seeing what they buy makes me feel happy inside. I say that because I was brought up to believe the womens place is in the house cooking, cleaning and rearing the kids...the men, dads place was working on cars, yard work and fix it up jobs. : )

Anyway...i do know times have changes since the 50, 60 and 70's.

Ok, enough for that.... : )

So guys lets us know what u did today? Keep it simple and fun....lol

scootin....again when im at the grocery store....i see lots of moms trying to juggle many things at one time.....we love our kids tho when we see them...most have been coming to the store since they were born...and now to play peep-eyes with them or to see how tall they have gotten....then of course i like to visit with the pregnant ladies as they get excited about the arrival of their new bundles. I can also sympathize with the moms that need time out for themselves....i remember at some of the meetings i went to back home in Baton Rouge...if a mom came in with her child and the child was restless...and i could see the mom really wanted to just be alone and hear the meeting...i would ask if i could walk outside with her child.....we had a huge open window to see outside...so she knew where i was at all times and could sit their peacefully for a few minutes before the meeting was over to reunite with her child. I was glad to be there to offer her some relief.

Anyway....

Ruby and Krys getting thos smoke alarms fixed....Isnt it wonderful to have someone like ur dad u can count on even as they get older to lend support love and care.

Lemonade, self-confidence, extra sleep, FRIENSHIP...advice, suggestions, love and care....we have it all right here in SR... : )

Im glad to have a place to come to today just to chit chat about my day.

Thanks u guys for being here for me today. : )