24 Hour Recovery Connection Part 307
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,217
Here for 24 more.
I had a great weekend and Monday- I spent a lot of time with our older son (6) and did some pretty cool things with him including taking him to a children's meditation/Buddhism class on Sunday. We both really enjoyed and and plan on going every Sunday. I felt on top of the world yesterday until he came home and shoved his 3 year old brother down onto the pavement. The physical aggression between the two and the constant fighting is a huge trigger for me. I don't know how to handle it but I get angry when I know I shouldn't. I ended up chasing him around the house for 5 minutes because he would not come inside. I am at a loss as a parent and feel like I am failing, big time.
Despite the 3 good days, I am having an awful day today. Been crying no matter where I go, what I do and I blew up at the boys again this morning for fighting.
I have been doing so much to work on myself- therapy, hypnosis, meditation and breath work and I even did a yoga class today. I'm still in tears and crawling out of my skin. I just want to feel better than this and I don't know what it's going to take at this point but I'm going to keep on trying.
I had a great weekend and Monday- I spent a lot of time with our older son (6) and did some pretty cool things with him including taking him to a children's meditation/Buddhism class on Sunday. We both really enjoyed and and plan on going every Sunday. I felt on top of the world yesterday until he came home and shoved his 3 year old brother down onto the pavement. The physical aggression between the two and the constant fighting is a huge trigger for me. I don't know how to handle it but I get angry when I know I shouldn't. I ended up chasing him around the house for 5 minutes because he would not come inside. I am at a loss as a parent and feel like I am failing, big time.
Despite the 3 good days, I am having an awful day today. Been crying no matter where I go, what I do and I blew up at the boys again this morning for fighting.
I have been doing so much to work on myself- therapy, hypnosis, meditation and breath work and I even did a yoga class today. I'm still in tears and crawling out of my skin. I just want to feel better than this and I don't know what it's going to take at this point but I'm going to keep on trying.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,521
Oh love. So many hugs.
Trying to do better is the very best we can do.....I fear that you are a bit hard on yourself. I know we all are ~ we share that trait. But look at all the wonderful things you accomplished this weekend....you are doing so well. The boys will be OK because they have incredible parents. Really.
And please try to be a little bit gentle with yourself.....just a little?
♥
Trying to do better is the very best we can do.....I fear that you are a bit hard on yourself. I know we all are ~ we share that trait. But look at all the wonderful things you accomplished this weekend....you are doing so well. The boys will be OK because they have incredible parents. Really.
And please try to be a little bit gentle with yourself.....just a little?
♥
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,217
Originally Posted by venuscat 
Oh love. So many hugs.
Trying to do better is the very best we can do.....I fear that you are a bit hard on yourself. I know we all are ~ we share that trait. But look at all the wonderful things you accomplished this weekend....you are doing so well. The boys will be OK because they have incredible parents. Really.
And please try to be a little bit gentle with yourself.....just a little? ♥
Trying to do better is the very best we can do.....I fear that you are a bit hard on yourself. I know we all are ~ we share that trait. But look at all the wonderful things you accomplished this weekend....you are doing so well. The boys will be OK because they have incredible parents. Really.
And please try to be a little bit gentle with yourself.....just a little?
♥
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,521
There are a lot of parents here....I am betting that many of them would agree that yelling at your kids makes you feel awful for sure....and I know you worry about the impact on the kids. I am not a mum, but I really hear you love. ♥
I have a rage problem....well, I most definitely did. I don't talk about it much here, but Nick and I have sure talked about it.
The very best way I am learning to let go of this behaviour is to do things for me....calming soothing things. And every time I 'mess up' and do it again, I get over the crazy a little quicker. Not saying you do what I do love....not at all. My rage is nuts. Pure and simple. I know why it was happening and I have addressed that, but I can't fix me overnight. It's going to take me a while to re-learn calm responses to all of the situations I find myself facing.
♥I have a rage problem....well, I most definitely did. I don't talk about it much here, but Nick and I have sure talked about it.
The very best way I am learning to let go of this behaviour is to do things for me....calming soothing things. And every time I 'mess up' and do it again, I get over the crazy a little quicker. Not saying you do what I do love....not at all. My rage is nuts. Pure and simple. I know why it was happening and I have addressed that, but I can't fix me overnight. It's going to take me a while to re-learn calm responses to all of the situations I find myself facing.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,217
Originally Posted by venuscat
There are a lot of parents here....I am betting that many of them would agree that yelling at your kids makes you feel awful for sure....and I know you worry about the impact on the kids. I am not a mum, but I really hear you love. ♥
I have a rage problem....well, I most definitely did. I don't talk about it much here, but Nick and I have sure talked about it.
The very best way I am learning to let go of this behaviour is to do things for me....calming soothing things. And every time I 'mess up' and do it again, I get over the crazy a little quicker. Not saying you do what I do love....not at all. My rage is nuts. Pure and simple. I know why it was happening and I have addressed that, but I can't fix me overnight. It's going to take me a while to re-learn calm responses to all of the situations I find myself facing.
♥I have a rage problem....well, I most definitely did. I don't talk about it much here, but Nick and I have sure talked about it.
The very best way I am learning to let go of this behaviour is to do things for me....calming soothing things. And every time I 'mess up' and do it again, I get over the crazy a little quicker. Not saying you do what I do love....not at all. My rage is nuts. Pure and simple. I know why it was happening and I have addressed that, but I can't fix me overnight. It's going to take me a while to re-learn calm responses to all of the situations I find myself facing.
Keep Going
Join Date: Apr 2017
Location: England
Posts: 1,530
Weev in for 24 more little hours at 7:33pm - not 34 like yesterday, that's just plain greedy.
Going to take myself off to Body Combat and try to sweat the hormones out of me.
It a pretty witchy kind of night out there tho. I'm kinda scaredy-cat.
Haven't caught up with thread yet so hope everyone has had a peachey day and it's all been easy 
Love and Weev prayers for all
Going to take myself off to Body Combat and try to sweat the hormones out of me.
It a pretty witchy kind of night out there tho. I'm kinda scaredy-cat.
Haven't caught up with thread yet so hope everyone has had a peachey day and it's all been easy
Love and Weev prayers for all
Guest
Join Date: Apr 2017
Location: UK
Posts: 2,256
Originally Posted by Sunflowerlife
Thank you- you are right that it is all about re-learning and that it won't happen overnight. I just never thought this is the person I would be today. It makes it even harder to love myself. Going to keep on trying though.
Anyone who takes their kid to a meditation class sounds like a fantastic parent to me Sunflowerlife! Family life will always throw you a few crazy moments but don't discount the positives. You're doing loads of things really, really well. And you're trying every day to be the best parent you can be. Your kids are lucky to have you xxxx
Member
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 4,553
Good evening everyone. Feels strange being behind on everyone's posts and news.
Had a very busy day out shopping for birthday pressies for me and my daughter. I do love my sister and mum loads but it's strange I feel like a bit of a stranger to them. By concealing my drinking for so many years they have no idea about all of this and my recovery and, well, you guys! Plus I've lied about why my bf isn't here. So I'm a little uneasy but it's nothing I can't cope with I'm my own little way.
Milestoners list is SUPERB today!!!!
Red darling I'm thrilled for your 6 months!!!!!
Lots and lots of love and ooh yes I'll have 24 please ❤❤❤
Had a very busy day out shopping for birthday pressies for me and my daughter. I do love my sister and mum loads but it's strange I feel like a bit of a stranger to them. By concealing my drinking for so many years they have no idea about all of this and my recovery and, well, you guys! Plus I've lied about why my bf isn't here. So I'm a little uneasy but it's nothing I can't cope with I'm my own little way.
Milestoners list is SUPERB today!!!!
Red darling I'm thrilled for your 6 months!!!!!
Lots and lots of love and ooh yes I'll have 24 please ❤❤❤
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,521
Originally Posted by kenton
You're an awesome person today Sunflowerlife! Taking your son to a meditation class is fantastic, really fantastic. As for shoving his little brother over, I think that's fairly standard sibling behaviour. My kids are always fighting about something. Just now, I was reading your post and I heard an almighty din and I ran out the kitchen and my boys are sitting on trays and sliding down the stairs because they "saw Bart Simpson do it." They're making loads of noise as the trays crash on the ground which is driving my daughters nuts. One of my daughters gabbed the tray off the ground and I know she was about to frisbee it towards one of the boys' heads but luckily I got it off her in time. But this is just life. It's messy and it's loud and sometimes I shout at my children because I'm human and I get tired and grumpy when I see their latest "science experiment" has ended up all over the kitchen ceiling ... don't let your kids put mentos into diet coke... just don't. But the thing is, I could beat myself up every day about something but I don't because I know that there's no such thing as a perfect parent and as long as I love my kids and always put them first, well.. hopefully they'll turn out ok.
Anyone who takes their kid to a meditation class sounds like a fantastic parent to me Sunflowerlife! Family life will always throw you a few crazy moments but don't discount the positives. You're doing loads of things really, really well. And you're trying every day to be the best parent you can be. Your kids are lucky to have you xxxx
Anyone who takes their kid to a meditation class sounds like a fantastic parent to me Sunflowerlife! Family life will always throw you a few crazy moments but don't discount the positives. You're doing loads of things really, really well. And you're trying every day to be the best parent you can be. Your kids are lucky to have you xxxx
And kenton.....you are some kind of awesome.
♥
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,217
Originally Posted by kenton
You're an awesome person today Sunflowerlife! Taking your son to a meditation class is fantastic, really fantastic. As for shoving his little brother over, I think that's fairly standard sibling behaviour. My kids are always fighting about something. Just now, I was reading your post and I heard an almighty din and I ran out the kitchen and my boys are sitting on trays and sliding down the stairs because they "saw Bart Simpson do it." They're making loads of noise as the trays crash on the ground which is driving my daughters nuts. One of my daughters gabbed the tray off the ground and I know she was about to frisbee it towards one of the boys' heads but luckily I got it off her in time. But this is just life. It's messy and it's loud and sometimes I shout at my children because I'm human and I get tired and grumpy when I see their latest "science experiment" has ended up all over the kitchen ceiling ... don't let your kids put mentos into diet coke... just don't. But the thing is, I could beat myself up every day about something but I don't because I know that there's no such thing as a perfect parent and as long as I love my kids and always put them first, well.. hopefully they'll turn out ok.
Anyone who takes their kid to a meditation class sounds like a fantastic parent to me Sunflowerlife! Family life will always throw you a few crazy moments but don't discount the positives. You're doing loads of things really, really well. And you're trying every day to be the best parent you can be. Your kids are lucky to have you xxxx
Anyone who takes their kid to a meditation class sounds like a fantastic parent to me Sunflowerlife! Family life will always throw you a few crazy moments but don't discount the positives. You're doing loads of things really, really well. And you're trying every day to be the best parent you can be. Your kids are lucky to have you xxxx
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,521
Do what you need to do jo jo....as long as you stay sober and can be at peace with yourself, it will work out. Maybe in time you will want to talk to your family about this....you never know.
Be proud of yourself honey. You are rocking this. ♥
Be proud of yourself honey. You are rocking this.
♥
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Posts: 28,680
Sunflower- one thing I do that changes my behaviour, my thinking and the way I feel about the world is CBT training. With a psychologist, mindful CBT meditation , journal stuff, art and exercise. I am beginning to break thinking patterns I have had my whole life. Such as very low self esteem, from the age of 4. Perhaps that may be of use to you. ALSO- there is a lot of stuff on line...diy..a very good site is 'Mood gym'.
Support to you.
Support to you.
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