Codependency and Beyond - Part 14
Leap of Faith Survivor
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 4,555
((Jane)), I am glad you are being gentle with yourself as you work your recovery...I used to worry about everyone else too, and I just didn't understand how that was hurting me...I thought I was helping...
now my world isn't quite so crazy, and I can enjoy helping where I am meant to and leaving the rest,focusing on me and enjoying my life....the life I was busy avoiding by being so involved in everyone else's life..lol..
now my world isn't quite so crazy, and I can enjoy helping where I am meant to and leaving the rest,focusing on me and enjoying my life....the life I was busy avoiding by being so involved in everyone else's life..lol..
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: South Dakota
Posts: 346
((((Rita))) Congratuations!
(((Amy)))) I'm so proud of how you are learning to take care of yourself and can't wait to see how well school goes for you. Bravo on your recovery.
(((Grateful))))
(((Hugs to all)))
Just a quick note. Exhausted but good. Youngest D went to the grandparents for the weekend. We had a blast. REALLY didn't want to come back here to the stress of the husband...but have done well so far at not engaging him and staying in my hula hoop.
Loves,
Annie
(((Amy)))) I'm so proud of how you are learning to take care of yourself and can't wait to see how well school goes for you. Bravo on your recovery.
(((Grateful))))
(((Hugs to all)))
Just a quick note. Exhausted but good. Youngest D went to the grandparents for the weekend. We had a blast. REALLY didn't want to come back here to the stress of the husband...but have done well so far at not engaging him and staying in my hula hoop.
Loves,
Annie
mergirl
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Paradise
Posts: 4,161
Wow! Its seriously like I am reading that for the first time. I never remember to take a positive inventory! I should though, because my life is pretty amazing and wonderful in the face of this gnarly chapter I am in.
I just realized I am knee deep in THREE legal shindigs (I hope I havent shared this already). I am dealing with union stuff as a shop steward, a workmans comp claim gone haywire and now the probate stuff. In the middle of all of this, it appears i have entered in to a relationship with a man who by all accounts I should have stayed away from, but is treating me marvelously and the two of us are having quite a lot of fun.
I got a call tonight from a girl in AA who relapsed and was in trouble, she touched my heart tonight.
The baby made her first big sale, the 3 kids are hanging out lots together, and the (ex)s family is reaching out to me
I walk in the light, in love and in reverence of it all today, by the grace of a higher power. I am a good person. I am making spiritual progress. Thank you all for sharing your journeys with me, the are lighting my way.
I just realized I am knee deep in THREE legal shindigs (I hope I havent shared this already). I am dealing with union stuff as a shop steward, a workmans comp claim gone haywire and now the probate stuff. In the middle of all of this, it appears i have entered in to a relationship with a man who by all accounts I should have stayed away from, but is treating me marvelously and the two of us are having quite a lot of fun.
I got a call tonight from a girl in AA who relapsed and was in trouble, she touched my heart tonight.
The baby made her first big sale, the 3 kids are hanging out lots together, and the (ex)s family is reaching out to me
I walk in the light, in love and in reverence of it all today, by the grace of a higher power. I am a good person. I am making spiritual progress. Thank you all for sharing your journeys with me, the are lighting my way.
Leap of Faith Survivor
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 4,555
You are reading from The Language Of Letting Go by Melody Beattie Copyright - 1990 The Hazelden Foundation
Powerless over Others
September 7
Stop making excuses for other people.
Stop making excuses for ourselves.
While it is our goal to develop compassion and achieve forgiveness, acceptance, and love, it is also our goal to accept reality and hold people accountable for their behavior. We can also hold ourselves accountable for our own behavior and at the same time, have compassion and understanding for ourselves.
When we claim powerlessness, we are not claiming irresponsibility. We have no power to control others, what they do, what they did, or what they might do. We're stating that we are willing to end an ineffective life based on willpower and control. And we're beginning a spiritual, mental, and emotional journey in which we take responsibility for ourselves.
We are not victims. We are not helpless. Accepting powerlessness when that is appropriate enables us to begin owning our true power to take care of ourselves.
Today, I will avoid making excuses for my own or someone else's behavior. I will let consequences and responsibility fall where they belong.
Powerless over Others
September 7
Stop making excuses for other people.
Stop making excuses for ourselves.
While it is our goal to develop compassion and achieve forgiveness, acceptance, and love, it is also our goal to accept reality and hold people accountable for their behavior. We can also hold ourselves accountable for our own behavior and at the same time, have compassion and understanding for ourselves.
When we claim powerlessness, we are not claiming irresponsibility. We have no power to control others, what they do, what they did, or what they might do. We're stating that we are willing to end an ineffective life based on willpower and control. And we're beginning a spiritual, mental, and emotional journey in which we take responsibility for ourselves.
We are not victims. We are not helpless. Accepting powerlessness when that is appropriate enables us to begin owning our true power to take care of ourselves.
Today, I will avoid making excuses for my own or someone else's behavior. I will let consequences and responsibility fall where they belong.
Leap of Faith Survivor
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 4,555
Originally Posted by grateful2b 
We are not victims. We are not helpless. Accepting powerlessness when that is appropriate enables us to begin owning our true power to take care of ourselves.
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It was a huge struggle for me to finally get to a place of surrender and acceptance of my powerlessness...but once I began to understand, that I really was powerless, it was life changing...
I can still find myself in a place where I have forgotten that momentarily
but thats ok...((Annie)) I have missed you! I am glad you went and had a bunch of fun, and good for you for maintaining those boundaries!!
(((Gyps))) you are in my thoughts and prayers. Your plate is full but your recovery is strong...be good to you...
msPINKacres, GeordieNYC, and fragrantrose((Everyone))
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