Karthas

I've failed quite a few SSRIs. And I'm tired of waking up each day thinking not another day of major depression and anxiety..... I just want a medication or something to take it away. When I'm dreaming I'm so peaceful and when I wake up I'm actually a bit confused for about 5 minutes like I don't know where I am and than I realize oh right I'm back to this world and I'm depressed and anxious going through misery 24/7......
the derealization and depersonalization is extremely scary as well it feels like I'm in a dream like state... Anyone around to talk or help...

Coldfusion

Hi Karthas!

I'm sorry you're feeling this way. I also deal with depression and anxiety, and find that lifestyle is the main thing that I can control. If I am getting exercise outdoors, eating well, and getting to my 12-step meetings on Zoom; then I find that I have fewer feelings of anxiety and depression.

How about joining the weekend thread here on SoberRecovery? There's several folks posting there, and it's a good place for support.

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ry-2022-a.html (Soar like an Eagle - Weekenders 21 - 24 January 2022)

Karthas

​​​​​​Thank u for the support. I'm in a different sort of depression and anxiety.... I'm in the process of tapering benzodiazpines. And altho I had depression and anxiety before benzos like valium now that I'm trying to taper and get off I've been basically bed bound. And so fatigued just talking I'm out of breath and I've had to have my gf buy me food because I'm so fatigued to get groceries.... I'm 35 years old about 210 pounds not really obese or anything but dam I'm just in hell and really struggling with anxiety depression and dpdr...... I'm glad your doing well did an SSRI help u?

Anna

Karthas, I hope that when you get off the benzos, your depression and anxiety will ease up. It sounds like the benzos have worsened your depression, so hopefully that will shift soon. Is your doctor helping you to taper off the medication and is he aware of your depression and anxiety?

Try to set reasonable goals for yourself each day such as taking a short walk, eating a nice meal, that kind of thing.

Astro

I can relate to these feelings but this goes back many years in my short journey with an SSRI. It took me a long time to adapt to the way they made me feel, "cobwebs on the brain" most of the time, and getting off them altogether was one of the best days in my first year of recovery. I agree with what others have shared with you already, I hope you can taper off the benzo's with the help of your doctor. I often share that what works for me best to keep my depression and anxiety at bay nowadays is sunlight, fresh air, exercise, and eating as healthy as possible. Socializing is huge for me too, but sometimes I have to push through the discomfort of being around others and open myself up to those relationships.

Alysheba

Karthas, I know this is later than your post, but I hope you are feeling better. Benzos are so complicated and really tough to come off of. I'm sorry things feel so badly for you and and hoping and sending good vibes your way..

Take good care and have a happy 4th!