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Grrrrr. enough is enough.

Old 04-24-2015, 10:56 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Nowiamawas1026 View Post
Oh my god looking at a stranger is totally correct. I have come to not even know who this person is anymore. Part of me so wanted to believe it was his brain chemistry fighting it's way through 12 years of opiate addiction...but his symptoms didn't get better, they have gotten way worse over the last 3 months.

Another thing that bothers me is that I think I'm the only one who has been able to see the change in him. (Maybe this is just me being stupid) as an addict he's very good at putting on a good face to others, and with me, I see all the good, bad, and ugly.
His parents blamed me for his addiction. Denial at it's best folks. They first tried telling me that if me and him weren't fighting as much, he wouldn't have been taking pills. And then they also went so far as to blame my profession stating that he never would have got addicted if the dr didn't prescribe him pain meds for a broken ankle 12 years prior. That was the last time I spoke with them....

God you guys are awesome. It's like everything you guys are saying and have been through and experienced, is my ex and I to a tee.
Yup, same!

His parents and friends don't believe me, despite the fact that he was in hospital 6 months ago with kidney problems due to detoxing from heroin.

Here is what one of his friend's text me "I am happy with what he has told me" - WTF!!!!!

Are you people to ignorant.

Of course he is going to tell you whatever you want to hear. Urgh.

Nevermind that I am the non addicted one who was living with him. His wife who was telling them that this addict is using again - WHY DON'T THEY BELIEVE ME!

This seriously bugs me.

His parents also blamed me... apparently me being a bad wife caused that relapse then, however now he is all 'hunky dorey' again according to them.

Gosh, this stuff is hard to deal with.
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Old 04-24-2015, 11:02 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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Wanna hear something really crazy? His parents HATED me, I'm about to be 32, I've traveled the country by myself, supported myself, awesome career...

They LOVED his ex wife, a college dropout who had a new job basically every 6 months, was on unemployment most of the time, and she was a RAGING pot head!!! Explain that to me!!!

People see what they want to see. In the ER it's blatantly obvious those that come in drug seeking and it's sad seeing whoever they are with, support the behavior. Then I look at the supporting person and I'm like "oh that's me, awesome"
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Old 04-24-2015, 11:30 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Nowiamawas1026 View Post
Wanna hear something really crazy? His parents HATED me, I'm about to be 32, I've traveled the country by myself, supported myself, awesome career...

They LOVED his ex wife, a college dropout who had a new job basically every 6 months, was on unemployment most of the time, and she was a RAGING pot head!!! Explain that to me!!!

People see what they want to see. In the ER it's blatantly obvious those that come in drug seeking and it's sad seeing whoever they are with, support the behavior. Then I look at the supporting person and I'm like "oh that's me, awesome"
Yes I can relate to this.

When I took my husband to the Doctors when he was detoxing I will always remember how he literally begged for methadone.

I have never seen that side of him before, it was a total shocker to me.
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Old 04-24-2015, 12:20 PM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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Dear Nowiamawas1026 & CarmenLove: Part of being in denial is believing in what is more comforting/less painful. Sometimes people do shoot the messengers.

If the addict's other friends and family members are not ready for the truth, they will do and say anything to avoid it. It's a family disease.

If you want to walk away/stay/etc. but wonder if it's the right thing to do: listen to your guts. Listen very closely. Every time I'm able to look back to my life, I feel my guts must have been screaming but got muffled by my denial and fear. Even if all you hear is a whisper, acknowledge that it is there, that you really hear it, that whatever it is YOU want to do is the right thing for YOU. It doesn't have to be right by anybody else but you.

I vaguely realized I needed to go get help when the addict's logic started to make sense to me....

Last edited by Somber2Sober; 04-24-2015 at 12:24 PM. Reason: added note
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