Desperately need to cope with the lies and betrayal
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 254
I hate all the lies too! But it's almost this sense of relief when you hear them that one final time, that last time that makes something in you snap, and you realize you are just not buyin' it any more. "I am not going to keep pretending to believe you any more."
It's going to get BETTER from here!
It's going to get BETTER from here!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 14
God, I hate addiction.
It makes me so mad/sad/confused, basically every emotion runs through my body, when I look and see how many others out there are just like me.
So many of us fall for the ones that are broken, trying to fix them... in turn to only end up broken ourselves.
Not to say that we all start out with addicted loved ones, sometimes it happens later on. But the fact that so many end up living this same life that we all speak of. We lose them to something, whether physical or mental... we start to lose ourselves in the process, caught up in trying to save whatever is left of our addict.
I hate how addiction can take a life so beautiful and destroy it. I hate that I find comfort in the fact that I am not alone... I wouldn't wish this upon anyone, but I am glad to know that I have found others to talk to.
My boyfriend is in rehab right now and the struggle is one that I have never had to deal with before. I completely see where you are coming from, it is hard to trust someone who has done nothing but lie and manipulate you. I find myself wondering time and time again what is going on, what to believe. Only time will tell.
It makes me so mad/sad/confused, basically every emotion runs through my body, when I look and see how many others out there are just like me.
So many of us fall for the ones that are broken, trying to fix them... in turn to only end up broken ourselves.
Not to say that we all start out with addicted loved ones, sometimes it happens later on. But the fact that so many end up living this same life that we all speak of. We lose them to something, whether physical or mental... we start to lose ourselves in the process, caught up in trying to save whatever is left of our addict.
I hate how addiction can take a life so beautiful and destroy it. I hate that I find comfort in the fact that I am not alone... I wouldn't wish this upon anyone, but I am glad to know that I have found others to talk to.
My boyfriend is in rehab right now and the struggle is one that I have never had to deal with before. I completely see where you are coming from, it is hard to trust someone who has done nothing but lie and manipulate you. I find myself wondering time and time again what is going on, what to believe. Only time will tell.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Greenville sc
Posts: 137
Seesaw and Sparkle. ......exactly.
The lies are so damaging. I feel so betrayed by them but then feel like a hypocrite because I am also dishonest. I cover things up and lie to family about anything that will thwart the chaos. And I never tell him the real truth about the finances because if he thinks i have a dollar he will find a life or death need for that dollar.
Its such a confusion and infuriating cycle.....He is now working on getting into another rehab. And im left with all the responsibility to do everything else. Ugh
The lies are so damaging. I feel so betrayed by them but then feel like a hypocrite because I am also dishonest. I cover things up and lie to family about anything that will thwart the chaos. And I never tell him the real truth about the finances because if he thinks i have a dollar he will find a life or death need for that dollar.
Its such a confusion and infuriating cycle.....He is now working on getting into another rehab. And im left with all the responsibility to do everything else. Ugh
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 254
I used to feel forced into lying too - saying I was too busy when she asked for things she could easily do herself, downplaying what was happening to other people.
It's always hard to figure out what the best way to protect yourself and your family is when you're in the thick of an impossible situation. No one handed us a handbook.
You're taking really positive steps now!
It's always hard to figure out what the best way to protect yourself and your family is when you're in the thick of an impossible situation. No one handed us a handbook.
You're taking really positive steps now!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Greenville sc
Posts: 137
So for an update. .......
He called me today and asked for a ride to a detox center. I was reluctant at first but then decided that i can do something good to help him after all the enabling that didn't help him at all.
I have no way of knowing what will happen from here but i know that detox followed by rehab is a huge step in the right direction. I will continue to have my boundaries but I will be supportive of this decision.
Here's to him working on him and me working on me.
He called me today and asked for a ride to a detox center. I was reluctant at first but then decided that i can do something good to help him after all the enabling that didn't help him at all.
I have no way of knowing what will happen from here but i know that detox followed by rehab is a huge step in the right direction. I will continue to have my boundaries but I will be supportive of this decision.
Here's to him working on him and me working on me.
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